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Author Topic: Boyfriend's revenge e-mail
snopes
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Comment: Apparently going around NY at the moment. 1st is a girl's apology email for cheating. 2nd is his reply which was Bcc'd to his entire address book. He makes some excellent points.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Brad,

It would be difficult for me to be any more miserable right now, I feel like the worst person ever. First, let me start by saying that I am truly truly sorry, and I hate myself for hurting you. Of all the people in the whole entire world, you were honestly the last person that I would ever want to wrong in any way. There is no excuse at all or anything that happened, so I won't even try other than to say all of us had WAY too much to drink, and I did a stupid thing. I can handle you being pissed at me, I absolutely deserve it, I can even handle the ugly words that were exchanged between us, what I can't handle is thinking that you see me as a different person. It is weird, I feel like I just went through a horrible break up or something. The world looked funny yesterday, I couldn't crack a smile if you paid me, there are songs I can't listen to, and I just feel beyond crushed. I don't know if you meant everything you said to me, and I am hoping that you didn't. I know that I was wrong on many levels, but I am also hoping that this is something that we can deal with. I know it sounds totally crazy and stupid, but you have come to play such a significant role in my life, I can't imagine my days without you. It is totally strange and weird to say that, and you could say that my behaviour didn't reflect that, and you would be correct. I hate feeling like you hate me, and I hate feeling like all of your friends think I am a terrible person, because I am not. I know there is nothing I can say or do to take back what happened, but I just want you to know that fighting with you was just about the worst thing I could have ever imagined. It was right up there with one of the ugliest nights of my life, and I would give anything in the world to rewind and fix it.

I am not sure if you will respond to this, part of me thinks that you won't. If not today, then maybe some other time. Also, thanks for getting my stuff together, although I think my sunglasses are still at your house, if you could keep your eyes peeled for them that would be great. I can't even focus or work today, I can't eat, I seriously feel like it was an ugly break up, and I am hoping against hopes that it was not that and you are not done with me. Please don't cut me off, I really don't think I can handle that.

I am so sorry.

Elizabeth


RESPONSE:

Dear Elizabeth,

Thank you for your concern. I'll be sure to file it away under "L" for "Long-winded diatribes from drunken whores I couldn't care less about".

You did a stupid thing huh? No...doing long division and forgetting to carry the one is "a stupid thing"; Mixing in a red sock with a load of whites is "a stupid thing"; Blowing some guy in a bathroom for 45 minutes while I sit at the bar wondering if you're taking so long because you ate too much bran that morning isn't as much a "Stupid thing" as it is grounds for permanent removal from my social calendar.

To be honest, I'm not sure if it was more amusing that you went and degraded yourself in a public toilet not once but twice in a 2 hour span, or that you seemed to think that by saying "Well, I didn't F**k him" somehow gave you a clean slate. So forgive me if I couldn't care less if the world "looked funny" to you yesterday. Since your world revolves around blow dryers, golden retrievers, Prada Bags and Jelly Beans, I'm sure it must have been most unsettling to actually have to consider someone else's feelings for 24 hours straight. The good news for you is that my friends don't think you're a terrible person, they just think you're the average run of the mill cum-guzzling blond who commands about as much respect as your average child porn collector. I could be wrong but, it's pretty hard to respect some B&T chick who comes out to spend the night at my place even though she's seeing someone else in New jersey and winds up tongue-bathing the taint of anyone who decides 30 minutes of droning commentary on Colin Farrell's new haircut is worth putting up with for a and job in the men's room. The good thing about being a guy is that when I eventually bump into the young lad who finger-blasted you on top of a towel dispenser last saturday, we'll have a shot and laugh our heads off about the time it happened.

By the way, for the amount of time you claim to spend in spin class you really must be doing something wrong to sport the thunder thighs you do. Watching you parade around my bedroom in a thong was a little like watching sea lions mate. Thought you might like to know.

PS. I BCC'd about 100 people on this email.

Talk to you never,

Brad

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Eve MG
Happy Holly Days


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Ooooh, he knows how to hit hard - that comment about the thunder thighs and sea lions was harsh!

I like the new brain-popping smiley!

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Missy_pooh1997
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Damn, that's brutal!

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"People do it everyday, they talk to themselves...they see themselves as they'd like to be,they dont have the courage you have, to just run with it".

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Errata
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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Pretty cruel. About the closing paragraph though, it comes off as ignorant. Regular spin classes do build really huge leg muscles, which is most noticeable on thin women. And you can't "spot reduce", so you wouldn't expect someone to have thin legs in particular from spinning, but the opposite. But relatively fuller hips and thighs are how women are supposed to look, it sounds like he's just got issues with women in general.
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snopes
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quote:
He makes some excellent points.
What, that if someone hurts your feelings, it's appropriate to retaliate by being deliberately and brutally hurtful?

If this were a real message, I'd have to wonder (as in most such cases) why the writer was so upset about the actions of a girl he evidently found so emotionally and physically unattractive in the first place.

- snopes

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reflex
Jingle Bell Hock


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
quote:
He makes some excellent points.
What, that if someone hurts your feelings, it's appropriate to retaliate by being deliberately and brutally hurtful?

If this were a real message, I'd have to wonder (as in most such cases) why the writer was so upset about the actions of a girl he evidently found so emotionally and physically unattractive in the first place.

It would be one thing if she just hurt his feelings, but damn. Cheating is a whole different category of hurt feelings. Even if all she did was play tonsil hockey with his jimmy, just the idea of a significant other doing something so intimate with someone else is enough to drive someone to such a vitriolic rage. What he writes now verses what he believed at the time he fell in love are two different things.

I remember when I broke up with my first girlfriend and how immature I acted - and she didn't cheat on me.

I don't condone what he did, but in a sense, I understand why he did it.

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The opinions expressed herein do not represent those of any rational human being and are solely for the purpose of entertainment.

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snopes
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quote:
I don't condone what he did, but in a sense, I understand why he did it.
I may understand why some people shoot up their workplaces, but I still wouldn't classify their actions as "making some excellent points."

- snopes

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halibut
Deck the Malls


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I like the fact that she sneaks in the request for her sunglasses back!! Way to try and make an apology LOL.

Well, not so much "sneaks in" as "whacks him over the head with a fish"

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Red Squirrel
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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Well asides from the sunglasses comment one of the e-mails was substantially more mature than the other. If someone cheats on you sending an insulting and prejudiced e-mail to everyone you’ve ever known is not the way to look like the bigger person. If I had received this about two people I knew slightly my gut reaction would be: fair enough the bloke has the right to be hurt but his reply is over exaggerated and immature. There may be a few people in the 100 people he bcc-ed that think he may have deserved losing his girlfriend if he thought or expressed the things he expressed in the e-mail while they were going out.

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The Sqizzle formally known as Lexi

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DesertRat
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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While childish and cruel, this was wildly entertaining. However, I feel it would have been far MORE biting and cruely effective without last paragraph... he went from hammering her in her tartish character flaw to hammering her on her looks in a VERY juvenile way. As snopes notes, I have a really hard time believing he would have had sex with--and be so worked up over--a woman that he found so attractive.

Do I condone what he did? Actually... yes. It's pretty cruel and NFBSKed up, but by her own admission, she reaped what she sowed.

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High on the wind, the Highland drums begin to roll, and something from the past just comes and stares into my soul... --Mark Knopfler

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halibut
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quote:
Originally posted by Red Squirrel:
Well asides from the sunglasses comment one of the e-mails was substantially more mature than the other.

I'm guessing here that you're female. ASSUMING this is a true exchange of emails, she was WAY out of order. What she did is a lot worse than what he did. She deserves no sympathy. I am left wondering how you would react if the sexes were reversed.
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GenYus
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quote:
Originally posted by halibut:
quote:
Originally posted by Red Squirrel:
Well asides from the sunglasses comment one of the e-mails was substantially more mature than the other.

I'm guessing here that you're female. ASSUMING this is a true exchange of emails, she was WAY out of order. What she did is a lot worse than what he did. She deserves no sympathy. I am left wondering how you would react if the sexes were reversed.
The email was more mature. Not necesarilly the actions that lead up to the email.

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IIRC, it wasn't the shoe bomber's loud prayers that sparked the takedown by the other passengers; it was that he was trying to light his shoe on fire. Very, very different. Canuckistan

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Cobalt Kitty
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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I'm a male and I agree her email was a lot more mature.

What she did before was not. But the guy showed HIS immaturity and vindictiveness in his reply.

If either or both of these people had been my friends, they certainly wouldn't be any more.

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Senior
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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If I were one of the people who had got these emails as a bcc, I'd make a point of dropping Brad from my Christmas card list. It's one thing to jump all over Elizabeth for what she did. It's quite another to tell the whole world about it.

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Ad astra per asparagus.

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halibut
Deck the Malls


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My point was about the focus of the issues, not the emails itself.

Squirrel's instinctual (is that a word?) reponse was that the girl's email was more mature, completly ignoring her actions which led to this exchange. Yes, the boy was out of order in what he did, but she was more out of order with what she did.

Anyhoo this isn't really relevant. I don't know any of these people so I really couldn't care if they're screwing around LOL

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Tirisfal Pumpkin
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Well I'm a girl, and I support wholeheartedly what he did. She cheated. She deserves it. And I understand where he's coming from. When you find out your bf/gf has cheated, or done something else bad to you, you can suddenly see faults you couldn't see before. I think it's natural in those circumstances, to see someone that was once attractive to you, as suddenly the opposite. I wouldn't do what he did personally (revenge just doesn't appeal to me as something I'd do at all) but that doesn't mean I think it's always wrong.

ETA On rereading, I think I have to say that her email is just lame. A simple, 'I did bad. I'm sorry. It's up to you to forgive or not' would have sufficed in this situation I think. Does someone who's been cheated on really want to read how the other person's world is suddenly so terrible because they've cheated?

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I'm ridin' my lollerskates all the way to my roflcopter

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Archie2K
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Let us not forget the power of the internet at spreading gossip. This may have been a hastily replied e-mail from an upset person that has now gone many cc's away from it's original sender and he might wish to reel those unnecessary and immature words back in.

To summerise;
Responsible: No.
Mature: No.
Understandable: Absolutely.

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Tirisfal Pumpkin
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Archie, I agree. He may very well have burned some bridges by doing this. I guess I just understand where he's come from in doing and saying what he did. He may though come to regret it later.

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I'm ridin' my lollerskates all the way to my roflcopter

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timbobmc
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I don't know why he was so upset she blew a guy in the john. According to some posters on this MB, it's not sex. At least that's what they told me.

Personally, I don't think I'd bother apologizing if I got so drunk that I'd blow a guy in a bar. I think I'd just move to another state and start going to AA.

I'd forget about the sunglasses, too. [Eek!]

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Ich bin der Welt abhanden gekommen.

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Mistletoey Chloe
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by timbobmc:
I don't know why he was so upset she blew a guy in the john. According to some posters on this MB, it's not sex. At least that's what they told me.

If you're referring to our unfinished conversation about how Clinton should have answered the question about sexual relations *given the definition established by the court*, you somehow mis-spelled "Paula Jones' lawyers" as "some posters on the MB." Oopsie.

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~~Ai am in mai prrrrrraime!~~

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timbobmc
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quote:
Originally posted by Chloe:
quote:
Originally posted by timbobmc:
I don't know why he was so upset she blew a guy in the john. According to some posters on this MB, it's not sex. At least that's what they told me.

If you're referring to our unfinished conversation about how Clinton should have answered the question about sexual relations *given the definition established by the court*, you somehow mis-spelled "Paula Jones' lawyers" as "some posters on the MB." Oopsie.
No, I meant you and your liberal cohearts. You never posted a cite for Paula Jones's lawyers, and even if you did, it's still sex.

Besides, I was just being polite and not mentioning you by name. You never did answer my question about if you caught your BF or GF, since I don't know your persuasion, in the oral act with another if you would blow it off as "not sex" because the "lawyers in the Paula Jones case say so."

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Ich bin der Welt abhanden gekommen.

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Aimee Evilpixie
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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Whether or not a blowjob counts as sex does not make it not cheating. It's cheating if he didn't know about it and wouldn't approve, whether it was a blowjob, a hug or getting a cup of coffee.

Cheating involves dishonesty. Period.

Aimee "In other news, it's really damn COLD in my house!" Evilpixie

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Ugg want you find JESUS!

My website!

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DesertRat
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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"Sex" or "not sex," when you put another man's NFBSK in your mouth, it's cheating.

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High on the wind, the Highland drums begin to roll, and something from the past just comes and stares into my soul... --Mark Knopfler

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I'mNotDedalus
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Oh man! Dammit! Why didn't anyone tell me!!! Come on! Are you kidding me? That can't be right! Oh lord! Sweet lord! Sweet delicious lord! It all makes sense now! Women kept leaving me 'cause I was putting British school kids in my mouth!

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The salty fragrance of L’Eau D’I’mNotDedalus - made entirely of and entirely for sea turtles.

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Bettie Page Turner
Happy Holly Days


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quote:
Originally posted by kia:
Archie, I agree. He may very well have burned some bridges by doing this.

Instead of burning bridges, perhaps he should consider burning his bed linens.

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You fail to consider, for such is the tyranny of fashion, that the swan is not a slim animal... -Jincy Kornhauser, Melinda Falling

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Mistletoey Chloe
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by timbobmc:
Originally posted by Chloe:
quote:
Originally posted by timbobmc:
I don't know why he was so upset she blew a guy in the john. According to some posters on this MB, it's not sex. At least that's what they told me.

If you're referring to our unfinished conversation about how Clinton should have answered the question about sexual relations *given the definition established by the court*, you somehow mis-spelled "Paula Jones' lawyers" as "some posters on the MB." Oopsie.
quote:
No, I meant you and your liberal cohearts. You never posted a cite for Paula Jones's lawyers, and even if you did, it's still sex.
Yes, I did. This one. And of course it's still sex. It is, not, however, "sexual relations," *given the definition agreed upon by the court*. Would you have preferred Clinton to have used a definition NOT agreed upon by the court?

quote:
Besides, I was just being polite and not mentioning you by name. You never did answer my question about if you caught your BF or GF, since I don't know your persuasion, in the oral act with another if you would blow it off as "not sex" because the "lawyers in the Paula Jones case say so."
Yes, I did. You left the thread. And referring to me without mentioning me by name is not polite; it's passive-aggressive.

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~~Ai am in mai prrrrrraime!~~

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timbobmc
Jingle Bell Hock


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QUOTE]Yes, I did. This one. And of course it's still sex. It is, not, however, "sexual relations," *given the definition agreed upon by the court*. Would you have preferred Clinton to have used a definition NOT agreed upon by the court?


Wait, you say it's sex but it isn't sex?
Make up your mind. Sex and sexual relations constitute the same thing, regardless of what lawyers think, unless we're referring to masturbation. If I am performing a sexual act, either orally, manually or coitus, on another person, it is sexual relations. If someone is performing a sexual act, either orally, manually or coitus, on me, it is sexual relations.

And, no, I was being polite. You chose to let everyone know that you thought I was talking about you. But if you prefer, next time I refer to something you and your cohearts have said I will refer to you by name.

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Ich bin der Welt abhanden gekommen.

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ladyknight
The First USA Noel


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Alright, hijack of the OP is over! I think the boyfriend in this acted really irresponsibly. It's incredibly immature to add that PS in the email. Send it to 100 other people, but why do you need to let her know? Not that she was mature by any measure, but still, I don't immaturity should be returned with more immaturity.

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Triumphs cannot be given. They must be taken, and the worse the odds, and the fiercer the resistance, the greater the honor. -- A Civil Campaign, Lois McMaster Bujold

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Sara at home
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I think the lesson to be learned here is to NOT email apologies.

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Assume that all my posts will be edited at least once. Dyslexic -- can't spell, can't type, can't proofread.

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Mistletoey Chloe
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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[hijack] To avoid further hijacking, I have responded to timbobmc in a thread called "Who are the ex-Bush voters?" in Soapbox Derby. [/hijack]

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~~Ai am in mai prrrrrraime!~~

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timbobmc
Jingle Bell Hock


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I'm sorry, I didn't realize I was hijacking the thread. I was commenting that despite opinions from other memebers of this message board, I consider what the girl did was have a sexual relation with the guy in the bar, and had I been in the same situation, I would not only have not apologized, I would have made every effort to avoid all mutual aquaintances and forget about the missing sunglasses.

The apology letter was stupid on her part, but the boyfriend's reply ended up being exceptionally cruel. Had he left out the thunder thighs comment and the CC to his entire address book, I might have a different opinion.

However, I think she behaved stupidly and brought the whole thing down on her own head.

ET correct spelling.

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Ich bin der Welt abhanden gekommen.

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Kitsune26
The First USA Noel


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Bad I'mNotDedalus! Bad! Spit 'em out right now.

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I'm as giddy as a Japanese school girl in an octopus tank.

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smartymarty66
I Saw Three Shipments


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I wonder how many of the friends he emailed called her up for a date?
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Mickey Blue
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
quote:
I don't condone what he did, but in a sense, I understand why he did it.
I may understand why some people shoot up their workplaces, but I still wouldn't classify their actions as "making some excellent points."

- snopes

Yes but this is paying back emotional hurt with emotional hurt (and I would wager that being cheated on hurts worse then a nasty letter, even if it does go out to multiple people), not paying back [whatever pissed off the worker] with bullets.


As for why he liked the girl he found so unappealing (both physically and mentally).. Well as another said when you leave a relationship (particularly in a bad way) you tend to notice all the things you either didn't notice or ignored while you were going out, I know I did.

A previous girlfriend cheated on me and I saw her in a completely different light (though all I got for an apology was "I didn't intend for it to happen" don't get me started on that one). And did I do some immature things? Yea, did I then, or do I now view them as wrong? No, as somebody else said, you reap what you sow.

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"All people are responsible for the good that they didn't do"

Posts: 4774 | From: Virginia | Registered: Feb 2004  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Sylvanz
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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Well, I think she was a stupid, drunken slob. He, however, was a complete whiny dick. Neither of these people has an ounce of sense, maturity, or self respect. YMMV

P&LL, Syl'and I don't understand why anyone would want to broadcast that sort of dirty linen on the internet...but I never got tell-all talk shows either'vanz [Roll Eyes]

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Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities. — Voltaire

Posts: 1944 | From: Michigan | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
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