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Author Topic: John 3:16, it sure makes a cynical bastard happy
you ain't nothing but a rossdawg
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
I don't know if we had this before but the bit about the hydrant bath is brilliant. And I love how a cold hungry street kid speaks in the third person and uses Beaver Cleaver's vocabulary.

quote:
JOHN 3:16

In the city of Chicago, one cold, dark night, a blizzard was setting in. A little boy was selling newspapers on the corner; the people were in and out of the cold. The little boy was so cold that he wasn't trying to sell many papers.

He walked up to a policeman and said, "Mister, you wouldn't happen to know where a poor boy could find a warm place to sleep tonight would
you? You see, I sleep in a box up around the corner there and down the alley and it's awful cold in there for tonight. Sure would be nice to
have a warm place to stay."

The policeman looked down at the little boy and said, "You go down the street to that big white house and you knock on the door. When they
come out the door you just say John 3:16, and they will let you in."
So he did.
He walked up the steps and knocked on the door, and a lady answered.

He looked up and said, "John 3:16." The lady said, "Come on in, Son."
She took him in and she sat him down in a split bottom rocker in front of a great big old fireplace, and she went off. The boy sat there for a while and thought to himself: John 3:16 ... I don't understand it, but it sure makes a cold boy warm.

Later she came back and asked him "Are you hungry?" He said, "Well, just a little. I haven't eaten in a couple of days, and I guess I could stand a little bit of food." The lady took him in the kitchen and sat him down to a table full of wonderful food. He ate and ate until he
couldn't eat any more. Then he thought to himself: John 3:16 ... Boy, I sure don't understand it but it sure makes a
hungry boy full.

She took him upstairs to a bathroom with a huge bathtub filled with warm
water, and he sat there and soaked for a while. As he soaked, he
thought to himself: John 3:16 .. I sure don't understand it, but it sure makes a dirty boy
clean.

You know, I've not had a bath, a real bath, in my whole life. The only bath I ever had was when I stood in front of that big old fire hydrant
as they flushed it out.

The lady came in and got him. She took him to a room, tucked him into a big old feather bed, pulled the covers up around his neck, kissed him
goodnight and turned out the lights. As he lay in the darkness and looked out the window at the snow coming down on that cold night, he
thought to himself: John 3:16 ... I don't understand it but it sure makes a tired boy
rested.

The next morning the lady came back up and took him down again to that same big table full of food. After he ate, she took him back to that
same big old split bottom rocker in front of the fireplace and picked up
a big old Bible. She sat down in front of him and looked into his young
face.

"Do you understand John 3:16?" she asked gently. He replied, "No, Ma'am, I don't. The first time I ever heard it was last night when the policeman told me to use it." She opened the Bible to John 3:16 and began to explain to him about Jesus. Right there, in front of that big
old fireplace, he gave his heart and life to Jesus. He sat there and
thought: John 3:16 â,¦ I don't understand it, but it sure makes a lost boy feel
safe.

You know, I have to confess I don't understand it either, how God was willing to send His Son to die for me, and how Jesus would agree to do
such a thing. I don't understand the agony of the Father and every angel in heaven as they watched Jesus suffer and die. I don't
understand the intense love for ME that kept Jesus on the cross till the end. I don't understand it, but it sure does make life worth living.

John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten
Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have
everlasting life.

If you aren't ashamed to do this, please follow the directions. Jesus
said, "If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my
Father."
Pass this on only if you mean it. I do Love God. He is my source of
existence.
He keeps me functioning each and every day.
Phil 4:13 If you love God and are not ashamed of all the marvelous
things he has done for you, send this on.

Take 60 seconds & give this a shot! Let's just see if Satan stops this
one.

All you do is
1) Simply say a small prayer for the person who sent you this, (Father,
God bless this person in whatever it is that You know he or she may be
needing this day!).

2) Then send it on to five other people. Within hours five people have
prayed for you, and you caused a multitude of people to pray to God for
other people. Then sit back and watch the power of God work in your
life for doing the thing that you know He loves.




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Milky White Midway Bill
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 98 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
The policeman looked down at the little boy and said...

sure sonny, I can cuff ya and print ya and send you to juvie for 60 days for selling stolen newspapers on the street without a permit. Then you can learn how to bypass a home-alarm and hotwire a car - skills that will carry you thru life!

Midway "a kid standing in a blizzard in Chicago would be buried in 10 minutes [Big Grin] " Bill

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Prostetnic Vogon Paul
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Okay, great, so then what? How long is this Bible verse good for? Until the next urchin comes a'knockin'? Then is there a Bible verse duel to see who can guilt the lady into charity first? (I don't know any myself or I would give an example.)

"Paul 3:14" Unwin

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hunka-hunka burnin' love jones
The Red and the Green Stamps


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I get the feeling that the lady who answered the door is the proverbial "hooker with a heart of gold". Which means that when the cop knocks on the door and says "John 3:16" he gets a different service.

love "she can make a clean cop feel dirty" jones

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MamaBird
We Three Blings


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After about the tenth hungry street kid came to her door and said that verse, the lady might be more likely to reply, "Hebrews 13:8"*.

*"Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, today, and for ever."

Mama "From bad to verse" Boid

--------------------
It takes a sexually stimulated man to make a chicken affectionate.

Posts: 1034 | From: Central Illinois | Registered: Feb 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Le Petomane
The Red and the Green Stamps


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quote:
Take 60 seconds & give this a shot! Let's just see if Satan stops this
one.

Satan here. I'm stopping this one. Immediately. You're welcome.
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