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Author Topic: Stupid puns it took you far too long to get...
Aptenodytes_Forsteriis
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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quote:
Originally posted by musicgeek:
quote:
Originally posted by DaBrudders:
quote:
Originally posted by Wish You Were Her:
quote:
Originally posted by DaBrudders:
I didn't 'get' the name Vetenari until Pratchett himself mentioned it in an interview.

I don't 'get' the name Vetenari, please explain. Is it that it sounds a bit like veterinary?
Yes but in that context it's a wordplay on the Medici family
Cool! I got the "veterinary" reference in "The Night Watch" when the character is referred to by some as "dog-botherer," but I never made the Medici connection. Leave it to Pratchett...
Do I get extra stupid points because it took a nine month old post to make me see the Medici connection. I got the Vet part, but the fact that I always think of Ankh Morpork as London totally made me miss the reference. I am [Frown] I missed a historical pun.

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'Hello, assorted humanoid strangers. You are standing casually in our forest. This bewilders us.' Blatherskite

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Necko
Bone Appétit!


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quote:
Originally posted by Anathema Device:
It took me until this year to get what Diagon Alley and Knockturn Alley in Harry Potter actually mean...

What DO they mean?
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Em
Happy Holly Days


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Diagonally and nocturnally.

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What the NFBSK does YOMANK mean?

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Dutch Angua
Deck the Malls


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quote:
Do I get extra stupid points because it took a nine month old post to make me see the Medici connection. I got the Vet part, but the fact that I always think of Ankh Morpork as London totally made me miss the reference. I am I missed a historical pun.
I know next to nothing about history, so that joke went past me too. Don't feel so bad.

quote:
Well now, the word 'Selachii' means "An order of elasmobranchs including the sharks and rays; the Plagiostomi" and the word 'Venturis' means "A constricted throat in the air passage of a carburetor, causing a reduction in pressure that results in fuel vapor being drawn out of the carburetor bowl". Broadly speaking then, the Selachii and the Venturis are "Sharks" and "Jets" respectively.... which as you know is the name of the two warring gangs in the musical West Side Story, which is an adaptation of Romeo and Juliet .
*Jaw drops* How does he come UP with those? Better yet, how did YOU figure this out?

Ps. Vetinari is one of the best characters ever.

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Dude, where's my siggy?

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Stoneage Dinosaur
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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quote:
Originally posted by Hello_Dave:
I was wondering, whether you can help me with a phrase I heard recently. As I understand, it relates to some joke, but I couldn't find any information about it.
The phrase is "bummers are deaf"
Can anybody explain it to me?

Thanks a lot [Smile]

Welcome to the boards Hello_Dave, big League of Gentleman fan eh? Anyway "Bummers are Deaf" is just a childish joke, you say it in a barely audible way then when someone says "what?" repeat it at a normal volume, thus implying that they indulge in homosexual activities. IIRC the character Geoff from the LoG gets the joke wrong by just saying it at normal volume.

In other news, there is a regular player on the UK TV show Poker Night Live called Hoof_Hearted - and every new presenter falls for it.

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"You learn something new every day if you're not careful" - Wilf Lunn

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jessboo
The First USA Noel


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A bit like:

a: asphinctersayswhat
b: what?

yay for Waynes World!!

Going back to the chicken crossing the road. I think all the 'afterlife' theories are taking it waaaaaaaaay too far. There's nothing to 'get', but you assume that there must be because the joke can't possibly be that simple...and then you realise that that's the joke. Isn't it? [Confused]

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Join me on Lost - www.lost.eu/edcf

Do you have any wine? All of this would go a lot smoother in an altered state of reality.

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birdman
We Three Blings


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quote:
Originally posted by Stoneage Dinosaur:
thus implying that they indulge in homosexual activities.

Whoa, that's what "bummer" means in British? Gives new meaning to the phrase, "That's a bummer!" or being "bummed out."

bird "that sucks" man

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Hello_Dave
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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quote:
Originally posted by Stoneage Dinosaur:
"Bummers are Deaf" is just a childish joke, you say it in a barely audible way then when someone says "what?" repeat it at a normal volume, thus implying that they indulge in homosexual activities. IIRC the character Geoff from the LoG gets the joke wrong by just saying it at normal volume.

In other news, there is a regular player on the UK TV show Poker Night Live called Hoof_Hearted - and every new presenter falls for it.

Thanks a lot Stoneage Dinosaur [Smile]

I knew I will find the answer on this board [Smile]

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James G.
Xboxing Day


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Okay, not so much a pun but it took me ages to realise why Asynchronous Java and XML was abbreviated to AJAX. (Ajax is a method of allowing pages to be updated dynamicaly from the server without having to refresh the entire page. Thus for example it would allow new posts on this board to appear dynamicaly as they were made, not when you hit refresh. It has been billed as a tool which will replace some of the current uses of flash)I my defense I've never actually seen Flash Gordon.

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This is a public service announcement. The board is moving. Check Announcements Photos[/URL]

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Mycroft
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Pratchett tends to be very sophisticated in his jokes, for example Unseen University actually relates to the Invisible College (a collection of natural philosophers in 17th century London which eventually became the Royal Society)- and no, I'd never heard about it either until Pratchett mentioned in The Unseen University Challenge quizbook (for the US University Challenge = College Bowl)
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Eddylizard
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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One from my ex-wife which I never noticed during childhood TV years 'Inspector Gadget' (Inspect her gadget.)

As for unfortunate names of businesses, there is or used to be a newsagent's a few miles from here called 'The Chocolate Cottage.'

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"Ladies and gentlemen, this is what is commonly known as money. It comes in all sizes, colours, and denominations - like people."

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Brrrtje
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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quote:
Originally posted by belaglik:
I about died when I found out that the name of the band Butthole Surfers was much worse than previously thought. I thought they were implying that surfers were assholes or they were assholes themselves who happened to surf (in the ocean), but it turns out that it refers to sodomy!

I never saw how it could be anything other than a reference to sodomy, really. Until I heard another explanation: apperently, you can refer to really small towns as 'buttholes' in English. So a butthole surfer is an artist who plays in the tiny clubs in every single little hicksville along the road.
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Polyeth12
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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I don't know if it has already been mentioned, but it took me forever to get the pun in Frigidaire appliances. (Frigid Air)
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Blue Fuzzy Thing
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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quote:
Originally posted by Ben Who:
This one took me years:

Ford: You'd better prepare for the jump into hyperspace. It's unpleasantly like being drunk.

Arthur: What's so unpleasant about being drunk?

Ford: Ask a glass of water.

Me: ???

Years later--

Me: OHHHHH!

I'm sure that's not the only one. Robert Asprin dumps so many pop culture references in the Myth Adventures that I'm sure some have flown straight past my head.

And a LOTTA dirty jokes, which required a familiarity with the slang terminology.

Love, Who?

Am I crazy, or are you confusing Douglas Adams with Robert Asprin?

Blue Fuzzy Thing

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People say I have ADD, but they just don’t understand that... Oh look! A chicken!

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candycane from strangers
Angels Wii Have Heard on High


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Not to speak for Ben Who, but I think those were two separate thoughts, Blue Fuzzy Thing.

Such as "I didn't get this one, and I'm sure it wasn't the only one, as Robert Asprin also has things I didn't get."

That's the way I read it anyway.

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Me: "He's 19? Uh oh, I bought him a beer."
A: "You contributed to the deliquency of a minor in drag!"
"Sweet spell check: keeping drunks off the radar since 1995."- IND
God Re-Animate Green Pork Bush

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Blue Fuzzy Thing
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Ahh, looks like I'm crazy then! [Smile]

Blue Fuzzy Thing

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People say I have ADD, but they just don’t understand that... Oh look! A chicken!

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candycane from strangers
Angels Wii Have Heard on High


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You say that like it's a bad thing [Big Grin]

--------------------
Me: "He's 19? Uh oh, I bought him a beer."
A: "You contributed to the deliquency of a minor in drag!"
"Sweet spell check: keeping drunks off the radar since 1995."- IND
God Re-Animate Green Pork Bush

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Lonely Mountain
Jingle All the Layaway


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Here's a bunch that took me more time than I want to admit:

There was a spice shop in my home town called Currant Thymes. I always thought they were spelling it in an old, medieval way like "Ye Olde Shoppe."

My local radio station used to run a fake commercial for Dicken's Fruit Stand and how there is nothing better than a nice Dicken's Cider. (they went on to describe other varieties of cider such as hot and hard.)

There was a minor league hockey team in Georgia called Whoopie. What made it a bad pun is that they were in the town of Macon.

This is one from the clean joke thread that took me forever to get:
A man and his wife are looking into a shop window. He points and says, 'That's the one I'd get." Next moment he is attacked by a Cyclops.

I also did not get the band name INXS until about 3 years ago.

[dunce]

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"Tis too much proved that with devotion's visage and pious action we do sugar o'er the devil himself." - Hamlet

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birdman
We Three Blings


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Resurrecting an ancient thread because I thought of another one:

Kid1: Are you P.T.?
Kid2: What's P.T.?
1: JUST ANSWER IT. ARE YOU P.T.???
2: Uhh... no, I guess.
1: HEEHEELOL YOU'RE NOT POTTY TRAINED??

Then they'll do it again:

1: Are you P.T.?
2: Uh.... yes.
1: Really? You're a pregnant teacher???

Kids enjoyed this little game way too much when I was about 8 years old. I never understood what was so funny about a teacher being pregnant, other than the fact that I was neither female nor a teacher.

A few years ago here, someone posted the joke, with the last line being "pregnant teenager," which makes slightly more sense.

What I find hilarious is that all these self-important kids were so proud of themselves, going around playing this little game, yet they weren't even telling the joke right. Clearly, they didn't even know why it was supposed to be funny (not that they would know why being a pregnant teenager would be funny either, but still).

-birdman

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invisigoth
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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quote:
Originally posted by dreadychar:
quote:
Originally posted by TrishDaDish:
When The Muppet Movie originally came out, our theater played a Muppet Show record over the speakers. There was one skit..."The Skit"...oh, my aching head...

It has Kermit and Fozzie Bear, and most of it's Fozzie telling Kermit to say, "Good grief, the comedian's a bear!" Wackiness ensues before they get to the actual joke. Having only heard this once, I can only tell you how the end went:

Kermit: Good grief, the comedian's a bear!
Fozzie (With terrible Italian accent): No, he's-a not! He's-a wearing a neck tie!


Okay, that reminds me of some of the other jokes in the Muppet Movie:

Fozzie and Kermit are at the bar talking about something, and the topic of frogs giving you warts comes up...

Kermit: No, no! That's just a myth!
Fozzie: A what??
Kermit: A myth! MYTH!
Woman passing by: Yes?
(this joke keeps recurring throughout the rest of the movie)


And also, driving in the car:
Kermit: Okay, bear left.
Fozzie: Right, frog!!

[Big Grin]
I wish they had the little ROFL smiley like in Yahoo messenger, because I need to insert that here!!

speaking of the muppets movie there was one line in it that no matter how much its explained to me i still dont get, its been going on for years and my mother refuses to talk abotu it anymore. they are going to exchange their car, the car salesman offers them a 12 dollar trade in, snookums(the bug hairy guy with the club) accidently smashes a fly on the sign for the car they want, changing the price from 1195$ to 11.95$. fozzie looks at him and goes , "theres out 12 dollar trade in, you owe us a nickle." i dont get it. [fish]
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LeaflessMapleTree
The twelve shopping days 'til Christmas


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quote:
Originally posted by Polyeth12:
I don't know if it has already been mentioned, but it took me forever to get the pun in Frigidaire appliances. (Frigid Air)

So it IS! [Eek!]

19 years...19 years... *sigh*

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"For me, religion is like a rhinoceros: I don't have one, and I'd really prefer not to be trampled by yours. But it is impressive, and even beautiful, and, to be honest, the world would be slightly worse off if there weren't any."
-Silas Sparkhammer

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Missie
I Saw Three Shipments


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quote:
Originally posted by Pork Chop Off Your Head:
not really a pun, but....


Me: Hey, Allie-
Allie: Hold on a sec.
Me (joking): No! No secs for you!
Allie: Ew!
Me:What?
Allie: EWWWW!
Me: I don't get it!

Oh gosh, this takes me back to when I was in second grade... I can't remember who said it (namely because I don't remember *any* of my old classmates from that time), but I distinctly remember a blonde, tomboyish girl announcing after she had just finished her lunch -

"I'm going back for secs."

It only took her a moment to add "SECONDS! I meant seconds!"

I didn't get it for a while. I don't remember how long it was, I just know that I was one of the few kids not laughing when it happened.

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Gavida
Deck the Malls


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quote:
Originally posted by invisigoth:
they are going to exchange their car, the car salesman offers them a 12 dollar trade in, snookums(the bug hairy guy with the club) accidently smashes a fly on the sign for the car they want, changing the price from 1195$ to 11.95$. fozzie looks at him and goes , "theres out 12 dollar trade in, you owe us a nickle." i dont get it. [fish]

Ok, let me try [Smile]

The salesman offers them 12 Dollars for their old car if they buy a new one from him.
Since the sign on the car they want to buy is 11.95 Dollars now (with the fly on it) the salesman would have to give them the car and 5 cents for their old one (12 Dollar trade in).
That is why Fozzie says that the salesman owns them a nickle (5 cents).

Gavida

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"He looked bigger when I couldn't see him" - Jayne Cobb

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PsychoWoman
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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There was a flap here recently over a billboard for Hooters advertising their new casino in Las Vegas that read: "Liquor in Clearwater. Poker in Vegas." My roommate couldn't understand why her husband and I were snickering at it.
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pob14
Jingle Bell Hock


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Mine was the fast food restaurant "Arby's."

You know, "R.B's". As in "Roast Beef."

I didn't get that until about two years ago.

--------------------
Patrick

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birdman
We Three Blings


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quote:
Originally posted by pob14:
Mine was the fast food restaurant "Arby's."

You know, "R.B's". As in "Roast Beef."

I didn't get that until about two years ago.

Apparently that was a backronym of sorts. From Arbys.net:

The idea was born. The only kink in the chain's orderly development came with choosing a name for it. The partners wanted to use the name "Big Tex," but were unsuccessful in negotiating with the Akron businessman who was already using the name. So, in the words of Forrest, "We came up with Arby's, which stands for R.B., the initials of Raffel Brothers, although I guess customers might think the initials stand for roast beef." It also serves as an acronym for America's Roast Beef, Yes Sir.

-birdman

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snoozn
Deck the Malls


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I just recently (about the past month) heard the Kay Jeweler ad: "Every kiss begins with Kay" and it dawned on me that it had the double meaning of the name "Kay" and the letter "K". That was a big "doh!" moment for me, as I think this ad has been around since I was a kid.

snoozn

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invisigoth
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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oh its no use explaining it to me, the concept is lost, ive exasperated my mother many a time with this, on another note my mom woke up the other night and finally got something my grandmother had told her as a child, only problem is once she fell back to sleep and woke up again she forgot what it was she had "got". my grandmother had soem weird sayings that we never got, like "you cant kid the goldfish." the womans been dead fo ryears and we are still scratchign our heads abotu it.
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franjava
Deck the Malls


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Okay, this didn't take me long to get, but I definitely had to think about it... I saw a local salon named "E. Gadd". Too funny.

"My local radio station used to run a fake commercial for Dicken's Fruit Stand and how there is nothing better than a nice Dicken's Cider. (they went on to describe other varieties of cider such as hot and hard.)" - Lonely Mountain


Reminds me of the SNL skit with (Alec?) Baldwin... "People can't get enough of my Shwetty Balls."

Edited to fix a horribly written sentence.

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Never eat anything given to you by a toddler.

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