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Author Topic: If you volunteer -don't bitch when asked?
YeeMum
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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Happy holidays to all!

So a few days ago DS who is 20 was all --says "I want to cook the ham ok? "
today I asked him " Do you still want to cook the ham?"

Now he is in the kitchen SLAMMING pots and such around and complaining about what he doesn't have.

I told him "Just never mind, I'll do it---I thought you really wanted to do it."
"No If I don't do it it won't get done!" was his response.

Can I borrow a magic wand and send him where ever the NFBSK it is he would rather be??????

Of sourse this comes just 2 days after he informed me I was a 'bad mother' (ahem, WHERE does he live again??)

Thank you for your time

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Charter member WNDMDC
"I am putting you on hold now.Listen to the elevator music and LIKE it."~My 'J'

Posts: 1816 | From: NE, Oregon | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Legion600
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Next time he tells you that you're a bad mother you should say, "You're right. I am a bad mother. I never give you enough freedom and independence." Then hand him a box and tell him to start packing up his stuff.
When he asks why, just tell him, "I'm giving you your freedom. You're free to go live somewhere else."

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Yes. I'm Evil. What's your point?

Posts: 199 | From: Bowling Green, OH | Registered: Oct 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Mickey is a Hanukkah Bush
O Come Let Us Adore Sales


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Legion, that's a bit harsh, and some people won't do it because they care too much and would worry too much about their child.

However, YeeMum, if it were me, I'd say "You're right. I am a bad mother. I spend money on utilities that you use. I spend money on food that you eat. I give you a roof over your head. If I'm such a bad mother, then you can do without my providing that for you, right?" and demand that he pay for rent, utilities, and food. That's what my parents are doing to my brother.

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My mom, about my nervousness with Jeopardy!: "Don't worry about it. Just get drunk and you'll do fine."
Blog Just call me Mickey 2

Posts: 3295 | From: Radford, VA/Herndon, VA/Orlando, FL | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
pirateslife
Deck the Malls


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I'm with Legion. The box might get the message through a thick skull, whereas guilt trips make people sulky.

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If the world were logical, men would ride sidesaddle. -Mama

I won't ask "Am I weird?" because that ship sailed long ago. -Kahuna Burger

Posts: 394 | From: Memphis, TN | Registered: Jan 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Amigone201
Happy Holly Days


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Wait. How about we do whatever we're going to do after cooling down a bit? Maybe have a talk?

I know, it's less fun, but seriously folks. Trust me.

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Check out my blog! http://fundiewatch.blogspot.com

Posts: 1527 | From: Buffalo, NY | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Christie
The Bills of St. Mary's


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I agree with Legion too. Sorry "kids" but when you are living at home at 20 you are living there totally at the discretion of your parents. You have to *be* 15 to get away with acting 15. By 20 if you want to call mom a "bad mother" and slam pots and pans in the kitchen pitching a temper tantrum at Christmas don't be surprised if Bad Mom shows you the door.

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If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation. - Jean Kerr

Posts: 18428 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
YeeMum
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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Dinner did turn out great----
and he is being civil to me now, no serious talk as yet but another day will have to be since I just can't handle a debate right now.

To add more information, he was working before the weather got too crappy. And he was adding a bit of money to the household budget (not near enough but.......)
Now he spends most of his time at his girlfriends house (she apparently has "better parents")
(funny since she lived with us part of last year because they kicked her out)

and
Since he has been talking to a recruiter (he is set to go mid January) he feels he really isn't consuming so any little thing he does is plenty.


I am pleased that he has decided to give the military a chance since he can't seem to get totally free of the 'nest' all by himself.
I really hope all the things his recruiter dude has promised are truth based ( but I guess that is another rant...........)

--------------------
Contact me for discounts
Charter member WNDMDC
"I am putting you on hold now.Listen to the elevator music and LIKE it."~My 'J'

Posts: 1816 | From: NE, Oregon | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
YeeMum
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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I was going to change the title to include "Son of a Rant" but that option had expired......
Rats I thought it would be more fitting now.

--------------------
Contact me for discounts
Charter member WNDMDC
"I am putting you on hold now.Listen to the elevator music and LIKE it."~My 'J'

Posts: 1816 | From: NE, Oregon | Registered: Dec 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Christie
The Bills of St. Mary's


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Good luck getting him out of the nest YeeMum! You seem to have way more patience with him than I would. I guess if you're a bad mother that would make me Evil Mom.

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If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation. - Jean Kerr

Posts: 18428 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Nov 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
   

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