posted
Just because we haven't done one for awhile....
- The Devil goes down to the wrong Georgia
- Signs you have a very bad pet
- Thanksgiving traditions that didn't quite make it
- What Fred Phelps dreams about
- Things you don't want to hear in a Snopes initiation ceremony
- If Snopes ran Congress
- World's worst Christmas decorating ideas
- Rejected ideas for Vegas tourist attractions
- Why this guy is being whacked with a frying pan
-------------------- "At all events, people who deny the influence of smaller nations should remember that the Croats have the rest of us by the throats." - Norman Davies, Europe: A History
God wants spiritual fruits, not religious nuts. Posts: 4578 | From: Sunrise, FL | Registered: Apr 2002
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Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
quote:- If Snopes ran Congress
"All those in favour of the Bannination of Ice From Bathtubs Act, say aye!"
-------------------- People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril) Posts: 8429 | From: New York run by the Swiss (Toronto) | Registered: Mar 2005
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*wham* *punch* *slap* And don't come bother Brad and me ever again!
-------------------- "For me, religion is like a rhinoceros: I don't have one, and I'd really prefer not to be trampled by yours. But it is impressive, and even beautiful, and, to be honest, the world would be slightly worse off if there weren't any." -Silas Sparkhammer Posts: 3239 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2003
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-------------------- "For me, religion is like a rhinoceros: I don't have one, and I'd really prefer not to be trampled by yours. But it is impressive, and even beautiful, and, to be honest, the world would be slightly worse off if there weren't any." -Silas Sparkhammer Posts: 3239 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2003
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-------------------- When there isn't anything else worth analyzing, we examine our collective navel. I found thirty-six cents in change in mine the other day. Let no one say that there is no profit in philosophy. -- Silas Sparkhammer Posts: 10141 | From: Toronto, Ontario | Registered: Apr 2000
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-------------------- "For me, religion is like a rhinoceros: I don't have one, and I'd really prefer not to be trampled by yours. But it is impressive, and even beautiful, and, to be honest, the world would be slightly worse off if there weren't any." -Silas Sparkhammer Posts: 3239 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2003
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quote: Rejected ideas for Vegas tourist attractions
The Sigfried and Roy Tiger Experience- BE the tiger!
-------------------- "Silly customer, you cannot hurt a Twinkie." -Apu (The Simpsons) Posts: 2026 | From: 10 miles South of Boston | Registered: Oct 2002
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Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
quote:- Things you don't want to hear in a Snopes initiation ceremony
"Yay! Canuck's back!"
or
"Canuck, that was mean, even by your standards."
-------------------- People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril) Posts: 8429 | From: New York run by the Swiss (Toronto) | Registered: Mar 2005
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"Honey, Rover just stuffed Fluffy down the garbage disposal again! "
quote:- Thanksgiving traditions that didn't quite make it
"Wow, that roasted gopher smells wonderful!"
"Hey everybody, the Thanksgiving Day Martha Stewart Marathon is on TV!"
quote: - Things you don't want to hear in a Snopes initiation ceremony
"Now, the fun part. We have 1000 new acronyms for you to memorize before you can make a single post on the message board."
quote:- World's worst Christmas decorating ideas
"Okay now, who's going to wrap the poison ivy around the Christmas tree?"
-------------------- If you have to ask you'll never know Posts: 31 | From: Highland, CA | Registered: Aug 2006
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Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
quote:- World's worst Christmas decorating ideas
"And with every purchase of Ann Coulter's big Christmas decorations, you get an Ann Coulter angel that'll top your tree and rat you out to the CIA, you whining 9/11 widow!"
-------------------- People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril) Posts: 8429 | From: New York run by the Swiss (Toronto) | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:. - Thanksgiving traditions that didn't quite make it
--"Who wants more sugared bison?" --"Oh, boy! The Frederick's of Hollywood Thanksgiving Day Parade is on!"
quote:- Why this guy is being whacked with a frying pan
"I just found out who writes all that glurge!"
-------------------- Where's the challenge in wassailing at Christmas? The place is lousy with wassail! Posts: 232 | From: Raleigh, NC | Registered: Jul 2006
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"Hey Jim, was it sugar plums dancing in the kids heads or on the kids head?"
-------------------- Tom, we're flying a giant robot into space! "Safe" isn't the first word that springs to mind! - Colleen, Last Hope, Vol.2 Posts: 2710 | From: Meet me in St. Louis | Registered: Mar 2004
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"My opponent is a liar, and he's immoral. He will corrupt America!"
-"Cite please!"
-------------------- "For me, religion is like a rhinoceros: I don't have one, and I'd really prefer not to be trampled by yours. But it is impressive, and even beautiful, and, to be honest, the world would be slightly worse off if there weren't any." -Silas Sparkhammer Posts: 3239 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2003
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quote:Originally posted by Pseudo_Croat: - The Devil goes down to the wrong Georgia
Don "second row, fourth from left" Enrico
-------------------- My spelling is Wobbly. It's good spelling, but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places. - Pooh Bear Posts: 2209 | From: Hamburg, Germany | Registered: Oct 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Pseudo_Croat: - Signs you have a very bad pet
Your browsers history shows tons of cat-porn sites that were accessed while you were at work.
Don Enrico
-------------------- My spelling is Wobbly. It's good spelling, but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places. - Pooh Bear Posts: 2209 | From: Hamburg, Germany | Registered: Oct 2004
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-------------------- "Silly customer, you cannot hurt a Twinkie." -Apu (The Simpsons) Posts: 2026 | From: 10 miles South of Boston | Registered: Oct 2002
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quote:- Rejected ideas for Vegas tourist attractions
The Bugsy Siegel Experience - Spend an evening ruling the roost of a 1940s style casino, before being whacked by a genuine mob hit-man.
-------------------- "You learn something new every day if you're not careful" - Wilf Lunn Posts: 893 | From: Durham City, England | Registered: Aug 2005
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1. You can't get the fur off your leather biker jacket. 2. Your motorcycle smells suspiciously of catnip. 3. You start seeing autographed pictures of female kitties in compromising poses. 4. The noises coming from your cats favorite hiding spot are definitely NOT sleepy noises. 5. You are starting to feel uncomfortable everytime kitty walks into the room, he seems so angry and scary now.
quote:Originally posted by Pseudo_Croat: - The Devil goes down to the wrong Georgia
Don "second row, fourth from left" Enrico
YOMANK!
- Pseudo "ain't fiddlin' around" Croat
-------------------- "At all events, people who deny the influence of smaller nations should remember that the Croats have the rest of us by the throats." - Norman Davies, Europe: A History
God wants spiritual fruits, not religious nuts. Posts: 4578 | From: Sunrise, FL | Registered: Apr 2002
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posted
This, Honorable Ladys and Gentlemen, is the very first keyboard I own since joining the board in October 2004. I am pleased and honored to have achieved this state of true snopster-ness after only two years and some 2000 posts.
I am not as pleased that it was earned by using a picture I stumbled upon while looking up the Wikipedis entry on Georgia (East Europe) to find something witty to say about the devil coming down there, but I will come over that.
Thank you, Pseudo_Croat, and mail me the invoice.
Don "LAM! My first YOMANK!" Enrico
-------------------- My spelling is Wobbly. It's good spelling, but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places. - Pooh Bear Posts: 2209 | From: Hamburg, Germany | Registered: Oct 2004
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posted
Once I dreamed the Devil came down to Georgia and challenged me to a fiddle contest. I explained that I cannot play the fiddle and asked if I could have a substitute to play for me. He said fine.
So I prayed, and the Lord sent an angel to compete in the contest on my behalf.
He was the late Jack Benny.
Brad "well, I'll be damned" from Georgia
-------------------- "No hard feelin's and HOPpy New Year!"--Walt Kelly Hear what you're missing: ARTC podcasts! http://artcpodcast.org/ Posts: 7581 | From: Gainesville, Georgia | Registered: Jun 2000
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guruwan2b
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
- Signs you have a very bad pet Kitty litter on your toothbrush.
- What Fred Phelps dreams about Doogie Howser...
- Things you don't want to hear in a Snopes initiation ceremony Maybe guru will show up with the pirate. (or was that what Phelps dreams. I always get those two mixed up.)
- World's worst Christmas decorating ideas Nah. It's safe. People in the old days always put candles on their trees....
Oh and the guy is being whacked with a skillet, because they couldn't find a fish....
-------------------- Too much of this navel gazing and we'll disappear up our own arses. Danvers Carew Posts: 7465 | From: Oklahoma | Registered: Oct 2001
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"Well, they're mothballs, but if we dip them in ketchup, they'll be red."
-------------------- "No hard feelin's and HOPpy New Year!"--Walt Kelly Hear what you're missing: ARTC podcasts! http://artcpodcast.org/ Posts: 7581 | From: Gainesville, Georgia | Registered: Jun 2000
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"What luck! jack Chick has agreed to write my biography and distribute it in tract format!"
-------------------- Where's the challenge in wassailing at Christmas? The place is lousy with wassail! Posts: 232 | From: Raleigh, NC | Registered: Jul 2006
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"What luck! jack Chick has agreed to write my biography and distribute it in tract format!"
Oh great! Now I'm going to have nightmares!
-------------------- "There is a race between mankind and the universe. Mankind is trying to build bigger, better, faster, and more foolproof machines. The universe is trying to build bigger, better, and faster fools. So far the universe is winning." -Albert Einstein Posts: 1058 | From: Yakima, WA | Registered: Dec 2005
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Jack Thompson - "It is violent activities like these that find their way into video games and poison the minds of our children! Won't someone think of the children!"
- Signs you have a bad pet
You find a solid gold fiddle underneath Fido's pet bed, and beside it is a contract with your name signed in blood.
- Worst Vegas Attractions
Welcome to Forceflow's Bedroom, complete with real dirty socks straight from the feet of Forceflow!
-------------------- Forceflow
"There was Joye in the courtroom, but he slipped on a-peel." = Prof. Kutner Posts: 101 | From: Pittsburgh, PA | Registered: Apr 2006
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Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
quote:Signs you have a very bad pet
Your dog forces you into a leash before your nightly walk.
-------------------- People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril) Posts: 8429 | From: New York run by the Swiss (Toronto) | Registered: Mar 2005
| IP: Logged |
If you burn yourself he drools hungrily and licks his chops.
-------------------- "Silly customer, you cannot hurt a Twinkie." -Apu (The Simpsons) Posts: 2026 | From: 10 miles South of Boston | Registered: Oct 2002
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posted
I hope no one will mind if I throw out some new topics: -----------
1)First drafts of famous song titles 2)Bad first impression on a first date 3)Signs you are spending too much time on the board 4)Unusual similes or metaphors for explaining how bad the food was
-------------------- "For me, religion is like a rhinoceros: I don't have one, and I'd really prefer not to be trampled by yours. But it is impressive, and even beautiful, and, to be honest, the world would be slightly worse off if there weren't any." -Silas Sparkhammer Posts: 3239 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Sep 2003
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