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Author Topic: A Poem For France
Christie
The Bills of St. Mary's


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quote:
Originally posted by UELoyalist:
quote:
Originally posted by Christie:
I'm amazed people are still feeding this troll...

Christie,

Gawd bless your cotton socks for such a succint deduction on the issues of this thread.

Thank You

UEL

Hey don't get me wrong, I think some of the posts here have been amazing. Informative, learned, compelling but there comes a time when it just seems sad to see all that erudition being so totally wasted.

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If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation. - Jean Kerr

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Dropbear
Angels from the Realms so Glurgy


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I reckon its a bit like the pokies - you convince yourself that this time you'll crack the jackpot - this time you'll reach through the bias and ignorance - this time they can't really sustain that level of bullheaded arrogance and must acknowledge some aspect of reality. Surely they must.. surely..

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" The villagers had said justice had been done, and she'd lost patience and told them to go home, then, and pray to whatever gods they believed in that it was never done to them. -- (Terry Pratchett)

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Dark Rikku
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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quote:
Originally posted by Dropbear:
I reckon its a bit like the pokies - you convince yourself that this time you'll crack the jackpot - this time you'll reach through the bias and ignorance - this time they can't really sustain that level of bullheaded arrogance and must acknowledge some aspect of reality. Surely they must.. surely..

yes, but isn't this "surely" the final beauty and hope of human existence? Isn't it the last thing left in Pandora's box?

if they had a puking "instant graemlin", I'd flame myself, but in the meantime I'll just be awfully embarassed at my own pathetic bout of lyricism (is that a word?)

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Dark Rikku
Santorum happens
Hail bloody marys

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Senior
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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Yes, lyricism is a word.

It would appear the Troll has decamped to hide beneath a different bridge.

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Ad astra per asparagus.

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Dropbear
Angels from the Realms so Glurgy


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quote:
Originally posted by Rikku
yes, but isn't this "surely" the final beauty and hope of human existence? Isn't it the last thing left in Pandora's box?

I quite agree - to me the "surely" represents a hopeful view of humanity. What has impressed me is your persistent, direct and respectful effort to challenge even one of the most trollish posters to think beyond their own assumptions and prejudices.

My old sociology lecturer used to tell me that he believed that people were basically good, and that we should strive to recognise and foster that good. When pressed however he acknowledged that the evidence for this belief was very slim at times. Even so he believed it was better to hope for better.

As I now appear to be starting to glurge (ha! I just made a verb) I'll stop now.

Dropbear.

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" The villagers had said justice had been done, and she'd lost patience and told them to go home, then, and pray to whatever gods they believed in that it was never done to them. -- (Terry Pratchett)

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Dark Rikku
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Ahah! just because I'm a philosophy, not a sociology major, I'll say "people are perfectible/good" is a postulate, not something that can be proved or disproved. It's just something that makes it possible to believe there is a point to what you're saying.

I'm probably someone else's troll, but sometimes I believe it is best to stand up and be counted when intolerable things are being said.

That was an easy troll, though. And he's probably still lurking… (I think he's been hit by a hiver…)

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Dark Rikku
Santorum happens
Hail bloody marys

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Major D. Saster
The First USA Noel


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Hello,

I've been following this thread for weeks, and now that I joined the board, the flag-waving troll's gone.

Too bad.

Bah. C'est la vie.

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Desperate, but not serious.

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The Memorial Storm
Lard Sharks


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Yeah, I feel the same way...

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"Everything dies, but not everything comes to an end..." - Rev. Thomas Martin, City of the Dead

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Dark Rikku
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Be careful what you wish for… he may still come back…

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Dark Rikku
Santorum happens
Hail bloody marys

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Dropbear
Angels from the Realms so Glurgy


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You need to be very careful indeed.

I heard that a group of students dared a girl to chant "bigoted troll" in front of a mirror thirteen times - she did the dare by herself in the bathroom and they heard screams and when they rushed in she was unconscious - ever since then she can only eat freedom fries, freedom toast and freedom sticks.

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" The villagers had said justice had been done, and she'd lost patience and told them to go home, then, and pray to whatever gods they believed in that it was never done to them. -- (Terry Pratchett)

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Silkenreindeer
Wassaleing


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I just sat here and read this entire thread and...

Alls I got to say is that although the original poem is a rehash of stereotypes, and has inconsistent meter and rhyme, it's good to see someone finally giving those cheese-eating surrender monkeys whatfor. In case you missed it, the latter part of that sentance was heavy in sarcasm.

Now, I do have a question for all y'all. I've seen this around the boards, but have no clue what it means - what is YOMANK?

Oh, and by the by, Dropbear, gotta love the Nac Mac Feegle.

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Dara bhur gCara
As Shepherds Watched Their Flocks Buy Now Pay Later


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quote:
Originally posted by Silkenray:
I just sat here and read this entire thread and...

Alls I got to say is that although the original poem is a rehash of stereotypes, and has inconsistent meter and rhyme, it's good to see someone finally giving those cheese-eating surrender monkeys whatfor. In case you missed it, the latter part of that sentance was heavy in sarcasm.

Now, I do have a question for all y'all. I've seen this around the boards, but have no clue what it means - what is YOMANK?

Welcome to the board, Silkenray. YOMANK stands for You Owe Me A New Keyboard, which has become an accepted salutation to a witticism. Dark Dan does a very good Snopes glossary thingy here.

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This wrinkle in time, I can't give it no credit, I thought about my space and it really got me down.
Got me so down, I got me a headache, My heart is crammed in my cranium and it still knows how to pound


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Silkenreindeer
Wassaleing


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Thank you kindly. This has been most informative...

Now I finally know what all of you are talking about!

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Ghost on Toast
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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So if the xenophobic troll has crawled back under his bridge to write more crappy poems, I guess I'm short of something to do now.

Guess I'll have to do actual *shudders* work..

*whistles for a while*

*watches paint dry*

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It's been a while but I'm back!!

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Silkenreindeer
Wassaleing


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Does this thread need reviving? If need be I can write a sonnet spiting Spain, an Acrostic abusing Australia, a tanka taunting Tonga, a limerick lampooning Liechtenstein...
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Eccles9
I Saw Three Shipments


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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Christie:
Just one example: "the White Mouse"

Ah, but Nancy Wake was an Aussie born in New Zealand. Australians and New Zealanders (ANZACs) fought and died for The Empire in 14-18 and again in 39-45. Then against the dreaded 'red hordes'* in Korea and Vietnam along side the US**...

Under the ANZUS treaty, Australian troops are again serving alongside US units in Afghanistan and Iraq in 2005...(I hope the Kiwis are still being pacifist about it all, go bro...)

We folks down in the southern hemisphere sure do seem to spend a lot of time fighting and getting killed in wars you lot start up north of the equator..

[Big Grin]

*a politically incorrect but historically valid label in this context
** This can largely, although imperfectly, be traced back to the state of the world after the fall of Singapore in 'World War - The Sequel', US intervention in the battles of the Coral Sea and Midway respectively, the fact that McArthur was appointed Supreme Commander of Australian troops during this same conflict and the post conflict Cold War...

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'Do not follow in the footsteps of the wise, seek instead what they sought' Matsuo Basho

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Eccles9
I Saw Three Shipments


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[QUOTE]Originally posted by Essayons:

There is no doubt in my mind that without the invasion of Normandy the Russkies would have overrun Europe.


Brings me to mind of the wonderful old Cold War era joke, 'To the Americans and the Russians, a strategic nuclear weapon is one that falls on Germany'...

[lol]

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'Do not follow in the footsteps of the wise, seek instead what they sought' Matsuo Basho

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Silkenreindeer
Wassaleing


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Right. In keeping with the original topic, here, have some insulting, poorly written poems about various nations.

Shakespearian Sonnet Slandering Spain:

Oh Spain, how can your beauty be expressed
in such crude words, which from my humble pen
may fly like doves with wings of lead, repressed
by pretenses of truth, now and again?

For when I seek to write about your class,
your taste, your style, your cultural milieu
I find that I am speaking out my NFBSK -
how can I praise a nation such as you?

A noble thing - siesta in the sun
relaxing in the heat of summer's glow
but as you nap, the day's work goes undone...
or if it's done, then it is done too slow.

And now my poem's done, but though I go
remember this - mi vaca est in fuego!


Acrostic Abusing Australia:

Australians, our friends down
Under are known for
Steve Erwin, extremely
Toxic wildlife, drunken
Rowdiness, historical abuse of the native
Aborigines, and most importantly,
Losing against England
In the
Ashes!


Tanka Taunting Tonga:

Tonga? Huh?
Where the hell's Tonga
Anyway?


Limerick Lambasting Leichtenstein:

There was a rich man from the Rhine
Who journeyed to old Leichtenstein
Where he could relax
Without paying tax,
And now that rich man's doing fine!


Note that I don't necessarily actually believe any of the above. I'm basically just trying to keep this thread from dying.

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Oualawouzou
Angels Wii Have Heard on High


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Impressive!

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Le champignon arrive.

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abigsmurf
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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that australia one written by the Barmy Army?

We haven't won the ashes yet, one more test to get through X_x

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Silkenreindeer
Wassaleing


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They're all written by me in parody of the idiotic drivel in the OP.

And my in-laws assure me that it's a foregone conclusion that England will beat Australia this go around [Wink] . As an American, frankly I find the entire sport utterly incomprehensible, so I'll decline serious comment one way or the other.

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Richard W
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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I like this game!

Verses Vilifying Venezuela

Hail to Venezuela,
Famous for llamas,
The Angel Falls
And President Chavez

Chavez is an insult to the great USA.
May llamas spit at him as he falls from the Falls
Silly hoody top and all


Haiku Haranguing Hungary

Ex-communisms
Never escape their bad pasts
Hungary is crap


Not as good as Silkenray's...

(edit) And my haiku wasn't a haiku when I first posted it - d'oh!

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Jay Tea
The "Was on Sale" Song


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A heroic stanza, slating, erm, Swaziland.

O how thee sit in a fit of pique
And envy strong of Mozambique
In East Africa ye dwell, not big, not small
Flooded with flies, without o'erflowing full.


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This is where I come up with something right? Something really clever...

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Richard W
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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Clerihew Condemning Canada

Prime Minister Paul Martin
Has been known to get a tart in
And when asked why he frequently bangéd 'er
Said "What else can one do in Canada?"

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Jay Tea
The "Was on Sale" Song


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quote:
Originally posted by Richard W:
Clerihew Condemning Canada

Prime Minister Paul Martin
Has been known to get a tart in
And when asked why he frequently bangéd 'er
Said "What else can one do in Canada?"

ooh ouch! [lol]

A Quatrain cuckolding Qatar.

In the Persian Gulf you sit so proud
Boasting oil reserves clear and loud
Stinking rich you may well be
But don’t you miss the Brits? And tea?


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This is where I come up with something right? Something really clever...

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Silkenreindeer
Wassaleing


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I'm currently working on, er, a Villanelle Villifying Vatican City. It's taking a while.

ETA:
Here it is.

A Villanelle Villifying Vatican City
The leader in theocracy,
A nation governed by the Pope,
is a threat to world democracy.

A stronghold of hypocrisy,
where priests their youthly charges grope,
this leader in theocracy!

Your God-given autocracy
which governs by religious trope
is a threat to world democracy.

A bible-backed androcracy
where women cannot dare to hope
to be leaders in theocracy.

Your hubristic world papacy
cannot with modern living cope!
It's a threat to world democracy.

America may supplant thee,
if God fulfills King Dubya's hope,
as leader in theocracy
and a threat to world democracy.


So it's forced, and inaccurate, and offensive. Fits in this thread perfectly!

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Richard W
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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Epic Eviscerating Egypt

I journeyed far to Africa
The pyramids to see.
A man approached in Cairo, "Sa-
-hib, I can help" said he

"A camel, yes? My daughter too,
"Bargain price" he leered.
"I throw in hashish just for you."
My good will disappeared

A throng arrived, all shouting offers
The heat beat down the while.
They stole my cash to fill their coffers;
I fled toward the Nile

The stinking water, fetid air
Combined to make me wonder
What the hell was I doing there?
It seemed a massive blunder


... unfortunately my hard drive crashed at this point and lost the middle 3000 stanzas, but they were truly epic, I can assure you ...

So home at last, I am dead beat;
I've never felt much worse.
Condemned to hours on the toilet seat
By Tutankhamen's curse


Hi thenk you. Now I've done as many as Silkenray, I think I'll stop for a bit! ... D'oh! She posted another while I was writing this!

(edit) I'm learning from this thread, anyway - I'd never heard of a Villanelle before. I'm impressed.

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wee wifey
Markdown, the Herald Angels Sing


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Richard, have you been to Egypt...every word of your epic rang true with me [lol]

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once known as little miss

"I don't Pretend to be an ordinary Housewife" Elizabeth Taylor

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Richard W
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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Nope! An unspoken condition of these is that they should be written on the basis of complete ignorance and prejudice...
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Doc J.
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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quote:
Originally posted by Richard W:
Nope! An unspoken condition of these is that they should be written on the basis of complete ignorance and prejudice...

Ah, well that's where you went wrong . . . 43.7 % of your Egyptian poem is factually correct. [Wink]
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wee wifey
Markdown, the Herald Angels Sing


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quote:
Originally posted by Richard W:
Nope! An unspoken condition of these is that they should be written on the basis of complete ignorance and prejudice...

unfortunately you have failed then, as, from my experiences, you were quite accurate [Wink]

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once known as little miss

"I don't Pretend to be an ordinary Housewife" Elizabeth Taylor

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Major D. Saster
The First USA Noel


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I hate to criticise, but it's much too well written. This style of trashy poem has to be bad as bad can be... I also miss the threatening aspect.

Let's have a try :

Song satirizing Switzerland

Oh you swiss garden gnomes
Who had no war for ages
Fear for your cows and homes
Your banks and all your watches

No oil is to be found
In all your land so rocky
Yet - can you hear the sound
Of our approaching army ?

Surrender, you dumbasses
It's Rummie and his pals
Who come to kick your asses
Because you're liberals


... is it bad enough ?

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Desperate, but not serious.

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Richard W
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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I think you've got it there, Major D. ...

(edit) Is this one any better?

Extra Epic Eviscerating Egypt

To all those towelhaeds in Asia
Aliens built your pyramids, dumbass
You support terrorists
So we'er going to get you

Remember the USS Cole
That was somewhere nearby I think
You wull all die in air strikes

The end. What dose epic mean anyway?

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overlord
The Red and the Green Stamps


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quote:
Originally posted by UE Loyalist:
quote:
The extent of French resistance hase been greatly exaggerated. The fact is that in both World Wars, France collapsed as soon as Germany blew hard at them (as they had previously in the Franco-Prussian War), and in WW-II many of the French actively cooperated; then, after the Liberation, it seemed that EVERYONE claimed to have been in the Resistance.
This seems to be a bit harsh, even for an over-generalisation. The French fought and died defending their land and people. In WWI, the French held the line at Verdun for 4 years. That is far from collapsing. Sure they had problems with mutinies and morale problems. But they held. During WWII they fought until they were run into the English Channel. They too were saved (at least a good many of them) by the "Miracle". They then invaded Normandy with the invading forces on D-Day and were instrumental in the Liberation of their capital.

If you want to put an over-generalised spin on the American participation in both wars "The Americans waited and watched the world torn by war, then when the profit margins started to slip, jumped in to ensure the money would keep coming."

Not fair to the Americans who fought and died, but neither is stating that the French rolled over when the Germans breathed on them.

In my opinion EU Loyalist said it all for me. Having lived in France 1953-1957, I have a better idea of how the French suffered, and how they lived.

As a young man I explored the underground fortifications on the Maginot Line. In those days all that kept people out was a sign stating not to enter-danger of death. I found many hand gernades, rusted, also bunks, articles of moldering clothing, bunks ect. I just looked and never touched.

Normandy beach was full of beached boats, from the D-Day landings.

We in America never had our country destroyed like France was destroyed. We have no idea of the suffering and loss of life.

But, this has already been said.

I consider my three years in France the best of experiences. Back home we could buy a hot dog or hamburger, but in France the food was all new, wine, cheese, pastry, salads, steaks, ham sandwiches on French bread. Food I never saw, or ate back home.

I liked everything about France, and when I came home it was boring. Back in Wyoming we could buy a bowl of chili or take in a movie. zzzzzzzzzzzz

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Ghost on Toast
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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Oh God.. I hate to keep this little b*gger of a thread going, especially as our resident troll has crawled back under his French-hating rock but this weekend I spent a lovely few days in France and as we were in the Somme valley we took a tour around a lot of the first world war memorials and I believe now more than ever that France paid a huge price in the wars and I still hate that damn poem.
It was such a humbling experience.

Thats all.

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It's been a while but I'm back!!

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