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Author Topic: Haggis Hunting
TB Tabby
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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Today's article of the day reminded me of an article I read in a Bathroom Reader:

quote:
The haggis is actually a "wee beastie" that lives in the bogs and glens of Scotland. It's easy to recognize these little creatures--their legs are shorter on one side than the other. Why? From scurrying sideways up the steep Scottish hills, of course. It's very difficult to find a haggis, as they only come out at night. And they have very sensitive ears.

"So if ye go huntin' for the haggis, don't wear anything under ye kilt. The sounda ye underwear rubbin' against ye plaid will sent 'em divin' for cover, laddie! And another thing: before ye go, ye've gotta drink lotsa Scotch to mask ye human odor. Them haggis have very sensitive noses, too, ye know!"

Result: Scores of happy, half-naked, inebriated tourists wandering around the countryside after midnight, drinking whisky and swearing that they just saw a real, live haggis...but it got away. "If ye com' back next year," you'll be told, "perhaps you'll catch one of them wee, tiny beasties."



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SiKboy
Deck the Malls


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I'll have to correct you there, they dont run up and down the hills, but around the hills.

The females of the species have their right leg shorter than their left, and they run round the hills clockwise. The males of the species have their left leg shorter than their right, and run around the hillside widdershins. They can only mate when a male and female happen to be running around the same hill at the same height and collide. Thats why the species is so rare. If you want to catch one, hide in a bush and wait for it to come by, then jump out from higher on the hill than it. The shy and retiring beast will be startled and overbalance on its longer leg, and fall over.

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This Space For Rent.

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TwoGuyswithaHat
Happy Holly Days


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Haggis can be found in London, Ontario. At least on September 12, 2006.

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Jason Threadslayer
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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Buy tinned haggis online.

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Jay Tea
The "Was on Sale" Song


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Tinned haggis is grisly, really grisly. Good fresh haggis is a real treat though, i'll have to keep my eye out at market because this thread has given me a hankering...I like it fried and served stirred into scrambled eggs, or even porridge.

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Llewtrah
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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I made the mistake of getting some foul-tasting cheap haggis (Halls I think). It is made from pork lung, not sheep, and is inedible - and there isn't much I consider inedible! Lung has very little nutritional value so it's obviously a way of getting money for pig leftovers and is an insult to real haggis. Even my cats wouldn't eat it and they ate real haggis (right off my plate if I didn't guard it). If I'd never had real haggis previously, this travesty would have put me off haggis forever.

Lung is not even recommended for cats and dogs due to its low nutritional value.

more on haggis hunting: http://www.shartwell.freeserve.co.uk/humor-site/fauna.htm

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Llewtrah's Soapbox

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violetbon
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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I just came back from a Scottish Fest in Columbus, IN, and they were serving haggis in a puff pastry rather than the traditional stomach.
I passed anyway, and went for the bridie instead.

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Floater
Xboxing Day


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A friend of mine toured Scotland last summer with some friends determined to try haggis after all I had said about the wonders of it. She came back very disappointed saying that it was exactly the same as the pölsa of her childhood in Northern Sweden minus the beetroot.

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Små hönor skall inte lägga stora ägg för då blir de slarviga i ändan

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Llewtrah
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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I'm going to thaw out the foul pork-lung faux-haggis and feed it to the foxes. That will make room for real haggis.

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Jay Tea
The "Was on Sale" Song


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quote:
Originally posted by violetbon:
I just came back from a Scottish Fest in Columbus, IN, and they were serving haggis in a puff pastry rather than the traditional stomach.

Inspired! Haggis en croute with a sweet whisky sauce - one for the farmer's market come Burns' Night.

Also, haggis is cooked in a stomach 'lining', not a stomach itself. Would be like saying a sausage is served in an intestine, whereas it's just lining membrane that serves as the casing.

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This is where I come up with something right? Something really clever...

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