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Author Topic: Cussing at automated phone menus will direct you to a live operator?
Joe Bentley
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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Lifehacker

quote:
Many IVR (interactive voice response) systems are programmed to recognize key words. Among those keywords are frequently a list of swear words, like the FCC's dirty 7. When asked to respond, use on of those epithets and you will likely be transferred directly to a live human being.


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Em
Happy Holly Days


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Slurring might also do the trick.

Machine: "For credit card enquiries, please say 'Yes' now"

Person: "Ungh snurfle-mggh"

Machine: "Please try again. For credit card enquiries, please say 'Yes' now"

Person: "Wosse snurf iklemggh!"

Machine: "Please hold while your call is transferred to an operator."

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What the NFBSK does YOMANK mean?

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Signora Del Drago
Angels Wii Have Heard on High


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I find that pushing 0 will do it in most cases. When the robot says something like "Please try again, you NFBSK idiot!", push 0 again. [lol] It sometimes takes more than once.

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"This air we're breathing. Oxygen, isn't it?"~I’mNotDedalus, impersonating Vincent D’Onofrio.|"Sometimes trying to communicate can be like walking through a minefield."~wanderwoman
"Give people a break. It's not easy doing a life."~Joshua Halberstam

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Lawgiver
Deck the Malls


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I have to call credit card companies on a daily basis at work and cussing does not direct you to an operator. I wish it did , then I would get right through to a human [Smile]

On a side note, calling American Express,the automated system not only doesnt understand cuss words, but accents as well. I never thought I had too much of a southern accent but it never understands me. Which is how I know it doesnt understand cussing [Smile]

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Pondicherry Pi
Deck the Malls


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I don't know about that, but I screamed something unintelligible at one once (something along the lines of "ARRRRRRGGGH!") and was told, "We are sorry you are having trouble, please hold on the line for an operator to assist you." So *that* works.

Of course, I usually recommend repeatedly thwacking "0".

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What the NFBSK is Glurge? Or, a link to Snopes Lingo

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NocturnalGoddess- naughty or nice?
Carol of the Dells


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quote:
Originally posted by Signora Del Drago:
*snip* "Please try again, you NFBSK idiot!"

*snort*

I would love to actually hear one say that! [lol]

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SchmooPie
Deck the Malls


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According to my DW, swearing at the Fedex PhoneBot will make it hang up on you.

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"Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you."
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Em
Happy Holly Days


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I once said some very nasty things to an automated system after being put through to the wrong number three times (at 50¢ a pop). When an operator finally answered he sounded a little apprehensive. It seems that my answer to "Please state the name of the person or business you wish to contact" was recorded and played back to him before he took the call.

He was very nice about it. He said something along the lines of "Could you repeat the name please? The recording is a bit fuzzy."

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What the NFBSK does YOMANK mean?

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jessboo
The First USA Noel


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Someone made a list a while ago of button sequences for various companies in the UK. most of them were just 'keep pressing 0', but some included other buttons like # or *. It was very helpful.

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Graham
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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If you're calling Optus customer service (as least in Australia) pressing '#' key three times does the trick.
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Joseph Z
Xboxing Day


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Somehow I think saying it at work would make you lose your job though.

Normally with 411, if I said the city/state and business name and the 411 automator said "what was that business again?" I say operator. May say "jesus christ" in a whisper and it gives me it too.

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Joseph Z

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Nion
We Three Blings


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quote:
Originally posted by SchmooPie:
According to my DW, swearing at the Fedex PhoneBot will make it hang up on you.

Am I the only one wondering just how many people have tried this since SP posted? [lol]

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Zakor2
I Saw Three Shipments


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LOVE THIS:

http://gethuman.com/

The actual database is:

http://gethuman.com/us/

Examples (sorry for formatting):

quote:
us automotive back to top
phone get human customer service
AAA 800‑222‑4357 Press 0 repeatedly after initial intro.
Allstate Road Service 800‑869‑7997 Direct to human.
ChevronTexaco 800‑243‑8766 Press 0 repeatedly.
Chrysler Financial 800‑700‑0738 Select Language, press 0 several times.
DaimlerChrysler 800‑992‑1997 After initial intro press 6, then press 2 1 * * at subsequent prompts.
Ford Interest Advantage 800‑462‑2614 Press # repeatedly
Ford Motor Credit 800‑727‑7000 Press # repeatedly at each prompt.
GMAC 800‑200‑4622 Repeatedly press # at each prompt.
Honda Financial Svcs. 800‑445‑1358 Press # repeatedly
Nissan Credit (NMAC) 800‑888‑2799 Press * several times after welcome intro.
Nissan USA 800‑647‑7261 Press #.
Thrifty Car Rental 800‑331‑9111 Press # at each prompt.
Toyota Financial Svcs. 800‑874‑8822 Select Language option; press # repeatedly.
VW USA 800‑822‑8987 Press 3 after initial intro; press 2 to decline survey.


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YudanTaiteki
Deck the Malls


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I wonder why people hate phone trees so much? When I worked at Apple, it was always annoying when people ended up at tech support when they should have pressed a different button, especially since we could not re-route their calls in some cases and so they had to call again from scratch.
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Griffin at the Maul
Joyeux New Sale


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The problem with phone trees is their tendency to direct the caller to the wrong place. Every time that I call Dell Tech Support, I end up in the wrong queue, but the rep either helps me anyway, or transfers me (and all the info) to the correct place.

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Lainie
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by YudanTaiteki:
I wonder why people hate phone trees so much? When I worked at Apple, it was always annoying when people ended up at tech support when they should have pressed a different button, especially since we could not re-route their calls in some cases and so they had to call again from scratch.

Some people just prefer to talk to a person. And sometimes the automated system doesn't provide an option that fits with the problem the person is having. They figure if they speak to a person, they can explain the situation. As for your not being able to re-route the call, that's a weakness of your phone system, although I can understand your frustration.

My personal pet peeve is having to key in my account number, then being asked for it by the first person I speak to. Or worse, being asked for it repeatedly by several people.

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Gale
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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I'm a buyer which means I stay on the phone about all day. I am generally doing two things at once, so I don't want to listen to phone tree options. I want someone to pick up the phone, I want to tell them what I need, and I want to be directed to that department. It's not unusual for me to spend an hour or more of my day on hold, too: no music, no commercials, and no "we value your call" messages! Do you know how pissed off you get when you hear "we value your call" for the 30th time? Or those "press 1 to remain on hold". nyahhhh
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ajna
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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I am starting to think that some companies actually remove the option to speak to a customer service rep. I have tried "0" "00" cussing and all sorts of things; sometimes it works but latley I have noticed a tendency for a recording to come up saying " '0' is not a valid option; please enter....." I have also noticed a tendency to 'hide' 800 numbers so they are harder to come by. Very frustrating.
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me, no really
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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I called one last night. Wasn't quite sure about which option was the right one for me so I took a bit of time to respond. After repeating the options a few times with no response from me, the system transferred me straight to an operator. I guess on a lot of systems "do nothing" could be a good way to speak to a human.

me

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quiltsbypam
Happy Holly Days


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I had to call an insurance company to find out what the heck they were writing to me for. (The policy had been cancelled for several years.) As I got deeper and deeper into Phonetree Hell, I finally said, to myself, "I just want a human being." The system said, "one moment please" and suddendly I had a person. That was the best surprise!

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"No Biblical hell could ever be worse than the state of perpetual inconsequence." Beatrice in Dangerous Beauty

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Scout
The First USA Noel


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I phoned a company earlier today, after getting through about 4 levels of "press 1 for department A, press 2 for departemtn B..etc.." It asked me to enter the first 4 digits of my reference number, which I didn't actually have to hand.

I was trying to find it to enter it, but thought it'll probably transfer me to a person if I don't enter it quick enough, when the system suddenly tells me:
"I'm sorry, you've entered the number incorrectly, to try again at entering the correct number please call back" and hung up on me!!

Scout.

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Signora Del Drago
Angels Wii Have Heard on High


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quote:
Originally posted by ajna:
. . .I have also noticed a tendency to 'hide' 800 numbers so they are harder to come by. Very frustrating.

Call 1-800-555-1212 and ask for the toll-free number for whatever company. If there's more than one number the operator will usually ask which department, for example, sales, tech support, etc.

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"This air we're breathing. Oxygen, isn't it?"~I’mNotDedalus, impersonating Vincent D’Onofrio.|"Sometimes trying to communicate can be like walking through a minefield."~wanderwoman
"Give people a break. It's not easy doing a life."~Joshua Halberstam

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ajna
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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Very Cool, Signora that' awesome. Thank you! But it doesn't change the idea that some businesses are beginning to 'hide' their 800 numbers. For instance, on one of my credit cards, there are numbers to call for customer service but they are long distance. They HAVE an 800 number but don't print it, which means folks out of the area have to dial the printed number long distance. I am starting to see this more and more.
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DemonWolf
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by Joseph Z:
Somehow I think saying it at work would make you lose your job though.

Normally with 411, if I said the city/state and business name and the 411 automator said "what was that business again?" I say operator. May say "jesus christ" in a whisper and it gives me it too.

If it is Verizon 411, hitting 0 will bring you to an operator. This is faster that confusing the recorder.

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IMJW-052804

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Ned23
Fighting Irish Stew


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I did read or hear a story in the news a year or so ago that a voice recogition software company was testing a new algorithm that could detect voice stress and anger and that it could identify people who sounded angry and move them either up or down the queue to get to them sooner or punish them depending on how the company wanted to handle it.
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Em
Happy Holly Days


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quote:
Originally posted by me, no really:
I called one last night. Wasn't quite sure about which option was the right one for me so I took a bit of time to respond. After repeating the options a few times with no response from me, the system transferred me straight to an operator. I guess on a lot of systems "do nothing" could be a good way to speak to a human.

This could be because some people have phones which use pulse dialling rather than tone dialling (or vice versa, depending on what the system is set up to use). If you don't have the right kind of phone, the system would need to put you through to a human or risk losing your business.

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What the NFBSK does YOMANK mean?

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tuff_gong
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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"If you'd like to press 1, press 2 now."

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"Cops Nab Co-eds in Pot Orgy"

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Van Couver
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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quote:
Originally posted by Griffin 2020:
The problem with phone trees is their tendency to direct the caller to the wrong place. Every time that I call Dell Tech Support, I end up in the wrong queue, but the rep either helps me anyway, or transfers me (and all the info) to the correct place.

I am still curious about this on our line....I have called there from the outside about 5 times...and evertime I had no trouble hitting the right queue. I mean...Press 1 for Information Press 2 for Technical Press 3 for Billing.
1 and 3 gets you to a Person and 2 gets you to the numbers respective departments (Press 1 for Internet Press 2 For TV and Digital aso...) and then to the technician. Yet i can't tell you how many times a days I get the wrong people in my line. And many of them telling me that they are probably wrong....but that they just pressed a few buttons.

But back to cursing...........That would have been great had it worked back then our phonenumber where changed. Whole districts got their numbers changed. And I spend about 1 hour cursing at the Telephon and the automatic reply.

Tape: Please state the first digit of the old number.
Me: Nine
Tape: Did you say five?
Me: No
Tape: Did you say seven? (because 7->"sieben" and 9 -> "Neun" sound as much alike in german as in english)
Me: NO
Tape: Did you say nine?
Me (relieved): YES
Tape: Please state the second digit of the old number.
Me: Four
Tape: Did you say three?
(repeat of the first number only with more choices being offered)
When I finally got throught the whole number 7 digits. I got thrown out of the line and had to do the whole call again. I am quiet sure that was the part where I started cursing.

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Nion
We Three Blings


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quote:
Originally posted by Ned23:
I did read or hear a story in the news a year or so ago that a voice recogition software company was testing a new algorithm that could detect voice stress and anger and that it could identify people who sounded angry and move them either up or down the queue to get to them sooner or punish them depending on how the company wanted to handle it.

I think it'd be much more entertaining to have the computer start cussing back at you.

Person: "Stupid f*&king COMPUTER! Shove it up your arse you piece of shite!"

Computer: "Don't like it? Figure this sh*t out on your own, dip sh*t!"

[Eek!] [Big Grin]

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It can't rain all the time.

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Sara at home
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by YudanTaiteki:
I wonder why people hate phone trees so much? When I worked at Apple, it was always annoying when people ended up at tech support when they should have pressed a different button, especially since we could not re-route their calls in some cases and so they had to call again from scratch.

I have, on more than one occassion, been given an 800 number to call for some reason but the phone tree options don't fit my need. There have been times when I've spent minutes on the phone, only to come to a dead end. When I call back (or, more likely, the second time I call back), I may press a number randomly just to get to someone who might be able to transfer my call or give me a more direct 800 number for my needs.

FWIW, swearing never go me anywhere on phone trees. I've tried, I've tried....

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UrbanReindeer
Deck the Malls


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I find that often when I can't reach a human any other way, pressing the options for the billing department gets me to one. They may not be the right human, but they're usually willing to help me when I apologetically explain that the phone tree didn't offer me the correct option.

AOL's customer service was like that. I could NEVER reach a human until I pressed the billing option. The people who take your money always want to talk to you.

What I hate is phone trees that won't let the call progress until you put in an account number. My old boss kept getting billed on his credit card from Earthlink and had no idea what it was for. I was in charge of all things computer, and I didn't know what it was for either.

Since I had no account to reference, the system hung up on me twice. Trying to get through to billing eventually put me on hold for 90 minutes until I got a live human to fix the problem.

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Latiam
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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My personal favourite was calling the university long-distance. After I got through, someone asked me if I could hang on a minute, and I said yes. I heard the phone being put down, then the woman trying to explain to someone whose first language that they couldn't help her. I waited, and then there was silence...they had CLOSED THE OFFICE and fogotten about me while I was paying long distance. Oooh, that got me. The next time I got through I had a chat with the manager.

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Top Kat
Deck the Malls


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I recently called the electric company. I had a problem with my bill, but the phone tree did not offer any appropriate option (not even talking to a person). About all the phone tree offered was hearing your current bill or having a duplicate sent to you. I just said "operator" and I got a live person!
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Lindiglo
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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quote:
Originally posted by SchmooPie:
According to my DW, swearing at the Fedex PhoneBot will make it hang up on you.

Damn, some robots are just so touchy!

The Rogers voice recognition robot (Melanie?) doesn't mind/understand swearing. Whenever I try to top up my phone and have to repeat myself for the millionth time, I chant
NFBSK your mom up the NFBSK NFBSK your mom up the NFBSK and she just pauses and says
"...Sorry. I didn't get that!"
OF COURSE YOU DIDN'T! *incomprehensible Donald duck noises*
"...Sorry. I didn't get that. Would you like to...add money to your account?"
*British Accent* "Yes!"
...and it works.
-L

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-Sophia Loren

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Joseph Z
Xboxing Day


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I would think Donald Duck would have them call the police on you if DD says "Doggone stubborn "N". "

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Joseph Z

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