posted
The Rainbow Bridge is a place of both peace and anticipation as departed pets await their beloved owners. There are plenty of things to keep them contented while they wait: trees you can't get stuck in, endless meadows, splashing streams, thickets perfect to hide in for pounce-attack games. But one day the residents noticed some rather...unusual newcomers arrive.
The koalas and the kangaroos slipped in rather quietly, but then came the bearded dragons, the skinks and the goannas. The influx of snakes startled an entire family of cats up a tree. Pythons, cobras, tiger snakes, brown snakes and even fierce snakes.
There were so many at one point, it seemed the ground itself was alive with writhing. A burly wombat shouldered his way through the crowd and plopped down in a shady spot, barely missing a Jack Russell terrier who yapped indignantly as he abandoned his position.
And then the crocodiles showed up. Finally, a Great Dane managed to get up enough nerve to approach one of the reptilian giants.
"Um....excuse me," he said hesitantly. "But why are you all here?" The croc dropped her jaw and laughed. "Same as you, mate," she said. "Waitin' for someone who loved us."
The dogs, cats, gerbils and other "typical pets" looked at each other in confusion, then at the plethora of weird, ugly and downright deadly creatures assembled. Who on Earth could possibly love some of those faces?
"I see him!" shouted a green mamba from his vantage point in one of the trees. A cacophony of squeaks, hisses, bellows and roars erupted as the mob surged forward toward a lone human walking across the field toward the bridge. The other animals managed to catch a glimpse of him before he was overwhelmed by the crowd.
"CRIKEY!" he shouted joyously right before he was bowled over by the wombat. "Well I'll be," said a Persian as she tidied up her fur. "It's that Aussie my human liked to watch on TV. Had to be the craziest human on the whole planet."
"Oh, please," remarked a echidna as he hurried by. "Is it really that crazy to passionately love something God made?"
Posts: 1338 | From: Orlando | Registered: Feb 2000
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Or maybe you could visit the Rainbow Bridge next time you're in honeymooners' heaven.
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Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
quote:Originally posted by Dutch Angua: And call me stupid, but I went "Awwwwww"
Not me. I find this is just a cheesy attempt to cash in on yet another celebrity's death.
And not even an original attempt: it's taking an existing glurge and adding on an even glurgier ending than before.
Sorry, folks, but count me among the unimpressed.
-------------------- People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril) Posts: 8429 | From: New York run by the Swiss (Toronto) | Registered: Mar 2005
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posted
Yeah, I think it's nice and all that Steve Irwin loved the animals no one else would love...but please, spare me the reasoning that "God made the animals, so everybody should love them."
quote:Originally posted by Canuckistan: Or maybe you could visit the Rainbow Bridge next time you're in honeymooners' heaven.
Oh, I do, Canuck I visit the Rainbow Bridge all the time! And I never see any cute, little animals waiting for me to scoop them up so I can love them. All I see are bitter, surly border guards waiting for me to make a slip up so they can give me a cavity search.
posted
Wait... were they all "his pets"? Because if it's only a place where animals wait for "people who loves them", half the freaking zoo will be waiting for my 2-year old (hopefully, for a really, really long time).
I know it's bad form to speak ill of the dead, but I didn't like the guy. I don't believe animals like being manhandled and teased, and I don't think he set a good example --not only because lots of people could get themselves in danger, but because lots of people could have put animals in danger.
Also, I disliked how the shows were more about him than about the animals. Give me Jacques Cousteau or Marlin Perkins any day. Heck, give me the guys from Zoboomafoo --the animals in that show look less stressed out.
-------------------- "The system would also let you send your picture and contact details to a rough trade gay contact mailing list saying you like to be surprised with power tools in a non-consensual role play scenario – but that doesn’t mean you SHOULD do it.!" Posts: 298 | From: Monterrey, Mexico | Registered: May 2005
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posted
BTW, I can understand someone loving the skinks. But the goannas? Who loves goannas?
-------------------- "The system would also let you send your picture and contact details to a rough trade gay contact mailing list saying you like to be surprised with power tools in a non-consensual role play scenario – but that doesn’t mean you SHOULD do it.!" Posts: 298 | From: Monterrey, Mexico | Registered: May 2005
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posted
Am I the only one that saw "Rainbow Bridge" and thought of Bifrost?
Posts: 296 | From: Crawfordville, Florida | Registered: Dec 2005
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DemonWolf
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
quote:Originally posted by Mr. Baggins: BTW, I can understand someone loving the skinks. But the goannas? Who loves goannas?
quote:Originally posted by RLobinske: Am I the only one that saw "Rainbow Bridge" and thought of Bifrost?
I did too, but that's because I looked it up.
-------------------- I like to go down to the playground and watch the kids run and jump and scream, because they don't know I'm only using blanks. Posts: 942 | From: Illinois | Registered: Jan 2004
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posted
Huh... when I found this, there was a whole part at the end involving his dog Sui. That was the part of this that made me a little teary-eyed, I saw that special on his show when Sui died, he seemed devastated.
quote:"Oh, please," remarked a echidna as he hurried by. "Is it really that crazy to passionately love something God made?"
"No, it's not," they heard a voice say from their crowd. "You see, I, too, was with him, at his side, as he caught the crocs, the snakes, and the spiders and spoke on the importance they have in life. For you see, I am his mate, his dog Sui. To you ordinary animals he may seem crazy, but to me he is simply known as a Best Friend."
And with that comment, as the animals looked on with surprise, she ran barking, clearing a path to him, and jumped in his arms, licking his face as he cried, "Sui, my mate, my friend. How I've missed you so." And with that, they all crossed the Rainbow Bridge together.
quote:Originally posted by Mr. Baggins: Wait... were they all "his pets"? Because if it's only a place where animals wait for "people who loves them", half the freaking zoo will be waiting for my 2-year old (hopefully, for a really, really long time).
That's what I was wondering. Also, if they were waiting for him to die, why did they only come to the Rainbow Bridge on the day Steve died? Shouldn't they have been waiting since they died? The glurge made it seem as though they just showed up today (much to the chagrin of the elitist, upper crust animals).
-------------------- "You can't play Electro-magnetic Golf according to the rules of Centrifugal Bumble Puppy." -Mustapha Mond, "Brave New World" Posts: 679 | From: New York | Registered: Oct 2001
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quote: Originally posted by Mr. Baggins: Wait... were they all "his pets"? Because if it's only a place where animals wait for "people who loves them", half the freaking zoo will be waiting for my 2-year old (hopefully, for a really, really long time).
That's what I was wondering. Also, if they were waiting for him to die, why did they only come to the Rainbow Bridge on the day Steve died? Shouldn't they have been waiting since they died? The glurge made it seem as though they just showed up today (much to the chagrin of the elitist, upper crust animals).
Aha! You put your foot on it. That's what bothered me the most about it.
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I liked the fact that the echidna considered that even Irwin, with his irritatingly gung-ho approach, was lovable ....
Okay, I've seen worse. I've probably written worse (commissioned for newsletters, not for my own amusement). I actually found it rather amusing with my own interpretation on the ending.
The scene opens at one end of the Rainbow Bridge. Several dozen cats are gathered, their tails lashing with anticipation. Many of them are missing one or both eyes, all are severely malnourished. Several of them bear obvious scars, skin conditions and other marks that speak of a complete lack of medical attention or even routine health care. There is a palpable stench from cat urine and feces embedded in their fur.
Suddenly, from high in a nearby tree, a feline voice cries out: "Here she comes!" As a lone human figure appears in the distance, down from the trees swarm several dozen more cats, joining the ones waiting at the bridge. They rush forward, yowling their rage.
The human figure goes down as the first cats reach her, and begins to scream.
The screams continue for a long, long time...
-------------------- "Nobody ever got stoned and beat up his old lady" -- Spence, snapdragonfly's friend Posts: 768 | From: North Hollywood, CA | Registered: Aug 2005
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-------------------- IIRC, it wasn't the shoe bomber's loud prayers that sparked the takedown by the other passengers; it was that he was trying to light his shoe on fire. Very, very different. Canuckistan Posts: 3694 | From: Arizona | Registered: Aug 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Dutch Angua: And call me stupid, but I went "Awwwwww"
Not me. I find this is just a cheesy attempt to cash in on yet another celebrity's death.
Wait a minute...wait just a goll-danged minute. You can get CASH for writing crap like this?!? Why has no one told me about this? I can write stupid, unoriginal, saccharine-coated crap easily. hell, I've got a piece all lined up about God and Byron Nelson shooting a round of golf together (hint: Jesus is the caddy that carries his burden). Where do I send it to collect my paycheck?
-------------------- "The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him." - G.K. Chesterton Posts: 1514 | From: Wisconsin | Registered: May 2005
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posted
Fair enough, Brandi, although I have very little problem restraining my sympathies for someone who ignores obvious suffering. With me, pity can only rarely eclipse contempt. I chose cats rather than dogs, in writing this, to illustrate that point. Dogs in the same imaginary situation would have been much more forgiving.
When you get down to it, most of the evil committed in this world is from people with mental problems. We can pity them all we like, but that's no reason to let their behavior continue.
And I totally agree about the puppy- and kitten-mill breeders.
Dog Friendly
-------------------- "Nobody ever got stoned and beat up his old lady" -- Spence, snapdragonfly's friend Posts: 768 | From: North Hollywood, CA | Registered: Aug 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Mr. Baggins: Wait... were they all "his pets"?
I know it's bad form to speak ill of the dead, but I didn't like the guy. I don't believe animals like being manhandled and teased, and I don't think he set a good example --not only because lots of people could get themselves in danger, but because lots of people could have put animals in danger.
Also, I disliked how the shows were more about him than about the animals. Give me Jacques Cousteau or Marlin Perkins any day. Heck, give me the guys from Zoboomafoo --the animals in that show look less stressed out.
I am glad I am not the only one who does not thinks Steve was almost saint. Sorry, but nobody who truly loves and respects wild animals would treat them the way he did. He ran a circus, not Zoo, with himself as the main attraction.
Posts: 214 | From: Melbourne, Australia | Registered: Oct 2005
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quote:Originally posted by Mr. Baggins: Wait... were they all "his pets"? Because if it's only a place where animals wait for "people who loves them", half the freaking zoo will be waiting for my 2-year old (hopefully, for a really, really long time).
That's what I thought, too.
Apart from that, I have a problem with the whole 'Rainbow Bridge' concept:
quote: The Rainbow Bridge is a place of both peace and anticipation as departed pets await their beloved owners.
Does that mean pets are not allowed into heaven until their owners are dead, too? And if so, what about real good, godfearing pets that happend to have a mean, nasty, (maybe even gay and communist) owner who loved them, but will never get to heaven? Do they have to sit around Rainbow Bridge forever?
And finally:
quote: The koalas and the kangaroos slipped in rather quietly, but then came the bearded dragons, the skinks and the goannas. The influx of snakes startled an entire family of cats up a tree. Pythons, cobras, tiger snakes, brown snakes and even fierce snakes.
Judging from what I see in my vet's waiting room (she specialises on reptils), the pets at Rainbow Bridge should be quite accustomed to all kinds of snakes, lizards and even crocodiles arriving - they've been kept as pets for years already!
Don "naked mole rats, on the other hand..." Enrico
-------------------- My spelling is Wobbly. It's good spelling, but it Wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong places. - Pooh Bear Posts: 2209 | From: Hamburg, Germany | Registered: Oct 2004
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quote:Originally posted by Dog Friendly: When you get down to it, most of the evil committed in this world is from people with mental problems. We can pity them all we like, but that's no reason to let their behavior continue.
It's true - I'm bipolar, and everyone knows I started WWII! Hitler and I? We were like >that< !
I know you said "most of the evil", not "all of the evil", so it's not a completely sweeping generalization, but it still irked me some. If most of the people causing "evil" in the world have a mental illness, I should think getting them help would be more effective than pitying them. You can't either "let behavior continue" or stop said behavior unless said people have treatment.
Just saying to a cat hoarder (for example), "Don't do it anymore" isn't going to change them. Hell, some people get the police on their case time and again for cat hoarding, even after the cats are taken away. They just can't help themselves. It is sad, but pitying won't do it either. They must learn behavior modification, and if needed, medication.
-------------------- I would prefer not to. My blog Posts: 4789 | From: Rhode Island | Registered: Feb 2004
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posted
Thanks Trish D-F I do believe you are labeling all persons with mental illness. However I have mental illness an my animals get the utmost care including Dr's care, my dog is an epileptic and requires bloodwork every month and it is costly and he never misses and takes medication twice a day and never misses. Please do not put a blanket on all people with mental disabilities. Thank You!~!