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Author Topic: The Demon-Haunted Computer
snopes
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Comment: i've never even HEARD of a gel candle, but i like candles. how do i know if they're gel or wax? do they look different? how?
now you've got me all nervous!
and how about gel pens? shall i start an urban legend about them exploding? a while back you had an item about liquids exploding in a microwave, and it indeed IS TRUE. i have twice had a cup of coffee blow up on me. fortunately i didn't get burned, but i had a mess to clean up. both times they blew up while the door was still closed.

my computer is evil.
don't send it any attachments.
don't open any from it.

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The perverted Scarlet Collector
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Is the red text part of the email?

I think you accidentally received an email from an employee of the Urban Legends Creation Organization to his boss.


-Fallom "The truth is out there"


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muas
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Is it just a coincidence that the font name of the red text is "Jokerman"?
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Sonja with a J
The Red and the Green Stamps


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
i've never even HEARD of a gel candle, but i like candles. how do i know if they're gel or wax? do they look different? how?

Well, the gel candle is gel and the wax candle is wax

Sonja "hope that clears that up for you" with a J


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Cure the Blues
We Three Blings


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
now you've got me all nervous!
Why, shame on you, snopes!!!
quote:
my computer is evil.
don't send it any attachments.
don't open any from it.

So we've gone from gel candles to gel pens to exploding coffee to a possessed computer. The logic is really hanging together well here

--------------------
"Of all the Daliesque tourist traps in the world, we had to walk into this one."

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snopes
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Comment: I love Urban ledgens but Im also afraid of them,when I get in the car I ALLWAYS look in the back seat first!!!
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IrateDwarf
Asparagus Spears


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: I love Urban ledgens but Im also afraid of them,when I get in the car I ALLWAYS look in the back seat first!!!

Simple solution - Buy a motorcycle


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abbubmah
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by IrateDwarf - Nuff Said:
Simple solution - Buy a motorcycle

or a truck... but then, you'll have to check for illegal immigrants hanging underneath...


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christmas tree kitapper
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: I love Urban ledgens but Im also afraid of them,when I get in the car I ALLWAYS look in the back seat first!!!

Wouldn't it make more sense to look in the back seat first then get into the car?

Also, who else here would pay good money to see this person try jumping to their car from 5 or 6 feet away so the under-the-car ankle slasher doesn't attack?

--------------------
"I have never in my life been more disappointed by a politician I voted for than I have been with George Bush. He is a total liberal."- overheard by me on the shuttle to the U of A game on Nov. 11th.


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rossdawg
The Red and the Green Stamps


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I love Urban ledgens but Im also afraid of them,when I get in the car I ALLWAYS look in the back seat first!!!

Sincerely,

A guy who rides a rollercoaster to work.


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snopes
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Comment: Somehow I put the word snopes across the whole screen when I only
wanted it on the desktop. How do I get rid of it????

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Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: Somehow I put the word snopes across the whole screen when I only
wanted it on the desktop. How do I get rid of it????

You just better hope it doesn't want to get rid of you ...

Of course, it may already be too late. In which case, computer screens will be the least of your worries ...

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People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril)

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snopes
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Comment: PLEASE, PLEASE,PLEASE tell me how to get rid of the Snopes logo
that covers my screen!!!!!!! All I wanted was the little icon to easily
reach Snopes and I have that as well as the whole screen covered. I have
spent hours trying to get back to a normal screen and can't do it.

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Roadie
Little Sales Drummer Boy


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: I love Urban ledgens but Im also afraid of them,when I get in the car I ALLWAYS look in the back seat first!!!

Does Barbara know you spend time in random back seats?

--------------------
"The little local company I buy from has CHEAP shipping and I have met their goats." (snapdragonfly)

"And that's one lost erection I'll never get back! You hear me Dan! I'm owed an erection!" (I'mNotDedalus)

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Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: PLEASE, PLEASE,PLEASE tell me how to get rid of the Snopes logo
that covers my screen!!!!!!! All I wanted was the little icon to easily
reach Snopes and I have that as well as the whole screen covered. I have
spent hours trying to get back to a normal screen and can't do it.

snopes, it's time to initiate Phase 2 of the plan. Unleash the naked mole rats!

--------------------
People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril)

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snopes
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Comment: There is a huge Yellow SNOPES.COM on my desktop and I cannot seem
to remove it. Please help me.

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Astra
The "Was on Sale" Song


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Wow, another zombie thread. It's really weird to read back through these things going "hey, whatever happened to..." on the way to the new stuff.

quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: There is a huge Yellow SNOPES.COM on my desktop and I cannot seem
to remove it. Please help me.

Close your eyes. Better?

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This has been yet another... USELESS POST.

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lazerus the duck
The First USA Noel


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: There is a huge Yellow SNOPES.COM on my desktop and I cannot seem
to remove it. Please help me.

The screen needs washing, take it to your bath (use an extension cord if your plug won't reach) and give it a thorough bath.

--------------------
All the world's a face, And all the men and women merely acne.

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KingDavid8
Markdown, the Herald Angels Sing


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: I love Urban ledgens but Im also afraid of them,when I get in the car I ALLWAYS look in the back seat first!!!

What a moron. Everyone knows that you look UNDER the car first to make sure no one's going to reach out and slash your ankles.

David

--------------------
www.MySpace.com/KDavid8

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Jocko's Jolly
Happy Xmas (Warranty Is Over)


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What is an Urban ledgen? Does it bite? [Big Grin]

--------------------
Like every good third-in-a-series it contains a whole load of ewoks, ‘Clubber’ Lang, whey-faced Sophia Coppola, Sean Connery as the Pirate Captain’s estranged dad, a crappy CGI alien, and Richard Pryor on a donkey. -- Gideon Defoe

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snopes
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quote:
The screen needs washing
http://www.theslurps.com

- snopes

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Senior
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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It's the outside of the screen that gets dirty, not the inside.

--------------------
Ad astra per asparagus.

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snopes
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Comment: in downloading your webpage I inadvertantly clicked on one of
your selections and instead of placing your icon as a shortcut on my
desktop such as you show on your webpage heading (a large icon a 1 1/2 x 3
3/4 retangle showing snopes.com). I cannot operate, move or remove this
and I do not want this particular item on my desktop Please advise how to
remove it.

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Ganzfeld
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: in downloading your webpage I inadvertantly clicked on one of
your selections and instead of placing your icon as a shortcut on my
desktop such as you show on your webpage heading (a large icon a 1 1/2 x 3
3/4 retangle showing snopes.com). I cannot operate, move or remove this
and I do not want this particular item on my desktop Please advise how to
remove it.

ALL YOUR DESKTOP ARE BELONG TO US
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yogi cat
I Saw Three Shipments


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: I love Urban ledgens but Im also afraid of them,when I get in the car I ALLWAYS look in the back seat first!!!

You guys laugh, but I have personally found a few urban ledgens in my own back seat! Not only are they SCARY, but they also leave big stains behind when you shovel them out... God only KNOWS what one of those things would do if I inadvertently drove off with one still in the car.

I've heard the mountain ledgens aren't quite so disrespectful.

--------------------
We criticize a thinker more sharply when he presents us with a displeasing proposition; and yet it would be more reasonable to do this when his proposition pleases us.
--Nietzsche

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snopes
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Comment: I am unable to use site. Click on something never comes up and turns my
webtv off??? Any idea's

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Psihala
Little Sales Drummer Boy


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
Comment: I am unable to use site. Click on something never comes up and turns my
webtv off??? Any idea's

The 'power' button on the remote shouldn't be used to click on something.

~Psihala
(*And I can't for the life of me find 'click on something' on any page I've found on this site.)

--------------------
StealthPost™

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snopes
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Comment: Mr. Gates, Its been a few years since your last visit to my
Kingdom Of Bhutan, may I introduce myself again, although we have met,
I am married to the Uncle of His Majesty King Jigme Singhey Wangchuk,
and we met at several funtions in your short stay here !! Mr.Gates I
have to report the behaviour of your Microsoft Internet Explorer as a
whole Entity?? I am sorry to have to bring this to your notice, but
even knowing I am from the Royal Family and a Princess ,I have made
Hotmail.com my Home-Page since I started using the Computer, but recently
am facing open hostility from whoever is in charge ?? Error Reports
for no reason at all,No reason for continual shutdowns and deterring me
from getting anywhere fast , I have threatened them, and used bad
language to try and stir them up to be a friendly- site, but I am
knocking on a Brick-Wall!!!! I hear you are pulling out of this
tricky Business ?? Could you just have a word with the concerned Parties,
because a lot of people, and I know a lot of them are leaving the
site for similar reasons they are interfereing with peoples lives, and
there is no Privacy anymore , I hope you and Belinda will visit
us soon again in Bhutan and I am sorry but this behaviour is so
infuriating,and I am sorry for having to worry you , Thank you in advance

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Shoebox
I Saw Three Shipments


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That has got to be the politest lunatic rant I've ever read.

--------------------
"Want you to know that if I had been there and they had of cooked you, I would not of eaten any." - Porkypine, Pogo

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snopes
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Comment: Suddenly I got an 8 page printout from my printer from
http://www.snopes.com/info/whatsnew.rss I don't want any rss feeds. And
I could find anything on the snopes home page on how to stop it. Or even
how to start it.

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Spam & Cookies-mmm
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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Wow. I think I work with these people. Well, not these specific people. The ones I'm thinking of would never actually visit snopes.com in the first place.

--------------------
Did you see the Announcement?
There's a new snopes message board!

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qualli
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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... when I first came to snopes and read the bit about ankle slashers I would always kick a random can or bottle under the car from several feet away. If it came out the other side it was fine, if I heard an "oww" I went back into the store.

I also found that keeping the back of my car full of empty fastfood bags and assorted boxes helped with keeping killers out of the backseat

--------------------
"I still say Obi-wan Kenobi was The Force's bitch."

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Larararara
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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I wonder if Melinda Gates knows that Bill is two-timing her with that trollop Belinda?

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I used to be a snopester...but my old login has gone the way of the legendary stolen kidneys.

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