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Author Topic: Dumb Sports Quotes
LizzyJingleBells
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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The people who are supposed to have said them are in the parenthasees.
=============================================
quote:
"And here's Moses Kiptanui, the 19 year old Kenyan, who
turned 20 a few weeks ago." (David Coleman)

"Its a great advantage to be able to hurdle with both legs"
(David Coleman)

Jimmy Hill: "Don't sit on the fence Terry. What chance do
you think Germany has of getting through? Terry Venables:
"I think it's 50-50."

"There is Brendan Foster, by himself, with 20,000 people."
(David Coleman)

"The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one
behind it which is identical." (Murray Walker)

"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and
father." (Greg Norman)

"There have been injuries and deaths in boxing, but none of
them serious." (Alan Minter)

"Watch the time. It gives you an indication of how fast
they are running." (Ron Pickering)

"That's inches away from being millimetre perfect." (Ted
Lowe)

"The Queen's Park Oval, exactly as its name suggests, is
absolutely round." (Tony Crozier)


Lizzy "play ball!" Bean

--------------------
Come on, come on, we were once upon a time in love
If the only prayer you say in your life is thank you, that would suffice. - Meister Eckhart My Blog


Posts: 7725 | From: Columbus, Ohio | Registered: Nov 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Cold DecEmbra Brings The Sleet
Angels Wii Have Heard on High


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Lizzy, have you been reading Colemanballs again?

Embra

"A lot of actresses have complained that as they get older the parts dry up."
JIMMY YOUNG, Radio 2

--------------------
I want you to lay down your life, Perkins. We need a futile gesture at this stage. It will raise the whole tone of the war.


Posts: 4495 | From: Surrey, UK | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
GravyTrain
We Three Blings


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Somewhere, I have come across the following in a book on poor quotes, but whether they were actually said was anyone's guess. Forgive the inevitable paraphrasing.

Coach to players at practice: "Okay, I want you to pair off in threes. Two of you form a circle around the third one"

Highly drafted NBA rookie: "I'm looking forward to giving it my all and turning this team 360 degrees around!"

GT


Posts: 1157 | From: Calgary, Alberta | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
rossdawg
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Not only does Jason Kidd have horrible hairdos, his rookie quote is timeless.

One time after playing winter ball in Mexico, Wes Chamberlain, who rented a fancy house and bought furniture for it, took everything with him back to Philadelphia except for the TV. He said left the TV behind because he thought it could only be used for "shows with people who talked Mexican."

Also, Darren Daulton when he was traded from the Phillies (team colors red and white)to Florida had a very tearful press conference. He said,"I'm really gonna miss it here, I bleed Phillies red."

The non-genius catcher also once got into a car accident and said he thought that you didn't need seatbelts if the car had airbags!!

ross "Yo la tenga" dawg


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GravyTrain
We Three Blings


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quote:
Originally posted by rossdawg:
Also, Darren Daulton when he was traded from the Phillies (team colors red and white)to Florida had a very tearful press conference. He said,"I'm really gonna miss it here, I bleed Phillies red."

Okay, maybe I'm a major ignoramus, but where's the catch?

Incidentally, one of the coolest quotes I can remember in baseball - here's the story:

Oakland once had a player/manager by the name of Kelly - can't remember his first name. Anyways, the opposing batter lofts up a nice pop fly that is going to land right in front of the dugout where he is positioned. He gets out of the dugout and bellows "KELLY NOW CATCHING FOR OAKLAND!" and catches the ball, claiming the batter is now out. Don't know if it really counted (or if it really happened

GT.


Posts: 1157 | From: Calgary, Alberta | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
rossdawg
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Daulton's reference is stupid because we all bleed "Phillies" red as humans.

As for the "Kelly" story,I have not heard that one but it was not uncommon before 1900 for a player-manager to sub himself in at anytime. I have heard of a story when one of these player-managers saw the ball popping up near the dugout, announced his switch and caught the ball himself...but this may be UL as well.


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Bad Ronald
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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quote:
Originally posted by rossdawg:
One time after playing winter ball in Mexico, Wes Chamberlain, who rented a fancy house and bought furniture for it, took everything with him back to Philadelphia except for the TV. He said left the TV behind because he thought it could only be used for "shows with people who talked Mexican."


ross "Yo la tenga" dawg



Rossdawg,
I'm from Fightin' Phils territory too, and as I remember it, this quote was attributed to former 1st round pick Jeff Stone. I'll poke around and see if I can find the quote.

--------------------
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
Winston Churchill


Posts: 821 | From: Delaware | Registered: Apr 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
rossdawg
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Please do, because I have three drunk friends and each time it becomes somebody else's "Mexican only TV" and I think I have just become another bad story victim.

I have heard Bedrock, Chamberlain and Milt Thompson(also a notorious silly quotes guy).

ross "planning to name first son...Von Hayes Van Slyke" dawg


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Smeazel
The Red and the Green Stamps


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quote:
Originally posted by LizzyBean:
"I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and
father." (Greg Norman)

Heh... I actually heard someone say something very similar to that once. Speaking in church, someone I know said "May we honor our parents, especially our fathers and mothers." (But then, this particular individual was infamous for such quotes. Another time when I asked him what time an event was, his response was something to the effect of "Well, I heard it's at ten, but I don't know if that means it begins at ten, they start it at ten, or you're supposed to be there at ten." But I digress...)

Anyway, on the subject of stupid sports quotes, there's something I heard attributed to Howard Cosell that I was wondering if anyone here could verify or disprove. Apparently Cosell's co-announcer once turned to him and asked, "So, Howard, who do you think will win?" "Not who," Cosell replied, "whom."

(For those who don't understand what's wrong here, "who" is actually correct in that context; "whom" is not.)

Anyone else heard this? Did Cosell really say it or not? If so, who was the other announcer? Just wondering.


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jarbabyj
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Just a few days ago, (ok a week ago), Chip Caray, smarmy Cubs commentator, remarked that the reason the cubs were doing so well this year was because:

"They're doing it with a different guy every night!"

Well hey! Sounds like some girls from my ol' college days are on the team.

Also, Mike Ditka did some commentary during the Bears preseason last year and when asked about his thoughts for the upcoming season he said,

"I think it's important for the Bears to win football games."

Good point Mike! We'll let them know.

jarbaby "light tossing in the bullpen" j


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