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RayInChicago
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Can anyone confirm or deny these quotes?

Subject: WHY WE SHOULDN'T IDOLIZE SPORTS FIGURES

Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role
model:
"I want all the kids to do what I do, to look up to
me. I want all the kids to copulate me."

New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked
about the upcoming season:
"I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."


And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skins say:
"I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl,"
Matt Millen of the Raiders said:
"To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."

Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann 1996:
"Nobody in football should be called
a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh:
"I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long
it takes."

Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach:
"You guys line up alphabetically by height." And
"You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle."

Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson hooking up
again with promoter Don King:
"Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter?
He went to prison for three years, not Princeton."

Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing,
explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself
above his locker:
"That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I
can still find my clothes."

Shaquille O'Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon
during his visit to Greece:
"I can't really remember the names of the clubs
that we went to."

Shaquille O'Neal, on his lack of championships:
"I've won at every level, except college and pro."

Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan
training regime of heavyweight Andrew Golota:
"He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the
morning regardless of what time it is."

Pat Williams, Orlando Magic general manager, on
his team's 7-27 record in 1992:
"We can't win at home. We can't win on the road. As
general manager, I just can't figure out where else to
play."

Chuck Nevitt, North Carolina State basketball
player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he
appeared nervous at practice:
"My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if
I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt."

Steve Spurrier, Florida football coach, telling
Gator fans that a fire at Auburn's football dorm had
destroyed 20 books:
"But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been
colored in yet."

Jim Finks, New Orleans Saints General Manager,
when asked after a loss what he thought of the refs:
"I'm not allowed to comment on lousy no good
officiating."

Alan Kulwicki, stock car racer, on racing Saturday
nights as opposed to Sunday afternoons:
"It's basically the same, just darker."

Lincoln Kennedy, Oakland Raiders tackle, on his
decision not to vote:
"I was going to write myself in, but I was afraid
I'd get shot."

Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former
player:
"I told him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it
ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know
and I don't care.'"

Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on
his coach, John Jenkins:
"He treats us like men. He lets us wear earrings."

Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M,
recounting what he told a player who received four
F's and one D:
"Son, looks to me like you're spending too much
time on one subject."

And The Gem:
Oiler coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas
why he takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips
responded:
"Because she is too damn ugly to kiss good-bye."



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Mortimer Brewster
The Red and the Green Stamps


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The Torrin Polk one is true. I remember seeing it at the time.

I've heard many references to the Shaq quotes as being real, but I've not heard the actual tape of him saying those things. They are widely accepted as true quotes.


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DrFraud
We Three Blings


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A couple of those are pretty old punchlines, one or two attributed to Yogi Berra, IIRC. (I think Gracie Allen may have made the "uncle or aunt" remark.) And a couple others sound witty rather than st00pid, IMO.
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ROBERT.BAK
The Red and the Green Stamps


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The apathy-vs.-ignorance one is an old joke. I have a version of it in my random-quotes file for my e-mail sig...
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tdn
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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quote:
Originally posted by RayInChicago:
Frank Layden, Utah Jazz president, on a former player:
"I told him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it
ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'"

I've been hearing this one as a joke for decades.


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Don Gato
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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quote:
Originally posted by RayInChicago:
Can anyone confirm or deny these quotes?

[...]

Shaquille O'Neal, on his lack of championships:
"I've won at every level, except college and pro."


Shaq did say this a few years ago, but then, since he led the Lakers to the NBA title last year, that means the only level he hasn't won at is college.

Why do these show why we shouldn't idolize sports figures? Some of them are rather funny, and were obviously meant as jokes.


Posts: 951 | From: The place to be | Registered: Mar 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
IlGreven, Swan a-Swimmin'
Grandma Got Run Over by a Rain Check


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And why does the quoter decide to mock the much older dead (Kulwicki, NASCAR driver who died on the track during practice in '93)?
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dunxie
The Red and the Green Stamps


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Can't confirm or deny any of these above, though many do sound like jokes. My personal favorite dumb athlete quote isn't there though
Last year after Eric Lindros suffered the 1,845th concussion of his career (give or take a couple) and was out for the rest of the season, he was stripped of his captaincy and Eric Desjardins was given the "C" to wear on his sweater. During a game soon after that, NJ Devil Claude Lemieux skated by him and said tauntingly, "What's the 'C' stand for? 'Selfish?'"

Dunx "true quote" ie


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