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Author Topic: Unfortunate baby names
Floater
Xboxing Day


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Someone mentioned his dentist, Dr Payne, the other day.

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Små hönor skall inte lägga stora ägg för då blir de slarviga i ändan

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wee wifey
Markdown, the Herald Angels Sing


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quote:
Originally posted by Floater:
Someone mentioned his dentist, Dr Payne, the other day.

did they really- where here on the board or IRL?

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once known as little miss

"I don't Pretend to be an ordinary Housewife" Elizabeth Taylor

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Doc J.
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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quote:
Originally posted by Floater:
Someone mentioned his dentist, Dr Payne, the other day.

My dad was for many years Mr Payne, the dentist. A source of much amusement to his patients, I'm sure.
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Floater
Xboxing Day


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quote:
Originally posted by wee wifey:
quote:
Originally posted by Floater:
Someone mentioned his dentist, Dr Payne, the other day.

did they really- where here on the board or IRL?
I think it was on another board, not here.

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Små hönor skall inte lägga stora ägg för då blir de slarviga i ändan

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wee wifey
Markdown, the Herald Angels Sing


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quote:
Originally posted by Floater:
quote:
Originally posted by wee wifey:
quote:
Originally posted by Floater:
Someone mentioned his dentist, Dr Payne, the other day.

did they really- where here on the board or IRL?
I think it was on another board, not here.
See the post above from DocJ for the reason for my curiosity.

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once known as little miss

"I don't Pretend to be an ordinary Housewife" Elizabeth Taylor

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The Restless Mouse
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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Urhines Kendall Icy Eight Special K
would be a good name for a show dog but not a child.

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candycane from strangers
Angels Wii Have Heard on High


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Not exactly an unfortunate name, but it could have been.

I had a customer named Elizabeth Taylor the other day. The funny thing was that she actually resembled Elizabeth Taylor quite a bit, though this lady was Black. She was beautiful and had curly dark hair, gorgeous eyes and even a beauty mark.

Since the famous Elizabeth Taylor is (or was, at least for the most part) known for her beauty it was lucky for the customer that she was so pretty. I imagine having the same name as a famous beauty and being plain looking or unattractive could get frustrating.

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Me: "He's 19? Uh oh, I bought him a beer."
A: "You contributed to the deliquency of a minor in drag!"
"Sweet spell check: keeping drunks off the radar since 1995."- IND
God Re-Animate Green Pork Bush

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Kiwimacahau
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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quote:
Originally posted by ULTRAGON-multifaceted:
SO worked in a hospital where the mother named her daughter Ah-SHOW-lee.

Nice name. Unfortunately, spelled "Asshole".

Nothing the nurses said could talk mom out of it, apparently.

American River Hospital in Charmichael California. Sometime in the early 90s.

Here in NZ the final decision of a child's name rests with the Registrar of births, deaths and marriages who can refuse to register a birth if the name is offensive.

Kiwimac

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I will shortly add something witty here.

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DanielCraft
I Saw Three Shipments


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I heard a very unfortunately named baby last week as I was picking up my son from the nursery.

The lady next to me called out to her two year old, "Come here Marcus Aurelius". *shakes head*

Poor little sod, he's going to be hammered by the other kids when he starts school.

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Free the West Memphis Three

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DanielCraft
I Saw Three Shipments


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double-post

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Free the West Memphis Three

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The Pikey Snow Queen
The First USA Noel


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Brosandi. Hendumst í hringi
Höldumst í hendur
Allur heimurinn óskýr
Nema þú stendur

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The Pikey Snow Queen
The First USA Noel


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Someone I work with is has the surname Beaver.

He named his unfortunate daughter Iona.

Poor girl

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Brosandi. Hendumst í hringi
Höldumst í hendur
Allur heimurinn óskýr
Nema þú stendur

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Mother of Nanaballis
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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My ophthalmologist's name is Dr Polk (you have to say it out loud).
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ChiLlBeserker
I Saw Three Shipments


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My father had a customer once called "Shai Pekka" .. pronounced "shy pecker" .. yikes.

There is a doctor somewhere in Vienna according to legends - or was at some point (IIRC, my father wanted to steal the plaque from this guy's office some decades ago, but didn't get to it .. or something like that) called "Gotthard Dick" .. once again, yikes.

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NewZer0
Happy Holly Days


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angelyze siouxluv [lastname]

Oh, my.

--NewZer0

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I study medieval literature because that's where the money is.

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F minor
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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quote:
Originally posted by Doc J.:
quote:
Originally posted by Floater:
Someone mentioned his dentist, Dr Payne, the other day.

My dad was for many years Mr Payne, the dentist. A source of much amusement to his patients, I'm sure.
My old dentist was called Mr Fang.
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piyokochan
I Saw Three Shipments


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quote:
Originally posted by DanielCraft:
I heard a very unfortunately named baby last week as I was picking up my son from the nursery.

The lady next to me called out to her two year old, "Come here Marcus Aurelius". *shakes head*

Poor little sod, he's going to be hammered by the other kids when he starts school.

Hopefully the other kids will just call him Mark or something.

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"Shakespeare and Dante divide the world between them. There is no third." - T. S. Eliot

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Cambion
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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A while back I noticed the name of a parent in the Births section of the newspaper. Mommy's name was "Porky". I can't begin to imagine the ridicule this girl must have suffered in her childhood.
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Primal
I'm Dreaming of a White Sale


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Having a "caucasian" sounding name ( at least the reason that was given to me) isn't any better. Talking to people over the phone and then meeting me has led to "Wow. i thought you were white" It gets annoying after a while. (My name is Amber Christine)
Oh and going to a school where they sang "America the Beautiful" every day didn't help any. Does everyone have to stare at me every freaking time they say "amber waves of grain"?

Trust me. Having a "normal" name can be just as frustrating.

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L
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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quote:
Originally posted by piyokochan:
quote:
Originally posted by DanielCraft:
I heard a very unfortunately named baby last week as I was picking up my son from the nursery.

The lady next to me called out to her two year old, "Come here Marcus Aurelius". *shakes head*

Poor little sod, he's going to be hammered by the other kids when he starts school.

Hopefully the other kids will just call him Mark or something.
Or even Marcus which is a reasonably common name.


And Jack Russell (the cricketer) can't count as an unfortunate baby name. That's more of a nickname, his birth name IIRC is Robert (it begins with an R anyway).

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NewZer0
Happy Holly Days


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Joyful Stoves.

--NewZer0

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I study medieval literature because that's where the money is.

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Sweet Home California
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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quote:
Originally posted by Ophiuchus:
There is a politician running for office in this area named Joe Nation.

I have to wonder whether that was the name he was born with or if he changed it when he went into politics.

I completely forgot about him!

My father wanted to name me "Tennessee" at first, and my mother wanted to name me "Teagan."

Also, not really an name, but I have a friend with the initials "ADHD." She's not very happy about that.

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I really hate one-eyed flying purple people eaters! I mean, seriously! They're all like, "I like to eat people, I'm purple, I fly and I have one eye!"-We've Got Mail!

The first game ever made using sand, water, oil, and a snail.

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CitizenAim
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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My college advisor's name is Wang Song. No one has ever really said anything about it, but it's funny to me. There is also a Long Wang in the computer science department at my university, which is not as funny as it could be since they'd probably reverse the order of their name to be Wang Long (like Wang Song, which is listed as Song Wang on everything).
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rogue
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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The instructor for my "Tests and Measurements" class was "Wah Ho."

We used to greet him before class "Hi Ho!"

-Rogue

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"'Cause you might enjoy some madness for awile."

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Illustrious Editor Ke
Miso Horny


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quote:
Originally posted by CitizenAim:
My college advisor's name is Wang Song. No one has ever really said anything about it, but it's funny to me. There is also a Long Wang in the computer science department at my university, which is not as funny as it could be since they'd probably reverse the order of their name to be Wang Long (like Wang Song, which is listed as Song Wang on everything).

In the same vein, I had an instructor named "Wang Dong."
Also, in Chinese, "song" means "loose" or "limp." "Long," on the other hand, means "dragon." So beware of the one, but don't bother with the other!

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The Master said: Seriously, there's no such ancient Chinese proverb. --Analects of Confucius

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NewZer0
Happy Holly Days


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Oohh, I also came across a Wang Dong once.

I came across this one today: La One [Lastname].

La One? For reals? How do you pronounce that?

--NewZer0

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I study medieval literature because that's where the money is.

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Rivkah Chaya
I Saw Three Shipments


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Quote:
Reminds me of a skit they did on SNL quite a few years back. The scene was a young married couple who were trying to come up with names for there unborn child. I believe it was a very young Nicholas Cage who was in the skit but my memory is slipping a bit. Anyway, the name they settled on? Azz weepie, spelled Asswipe!

Actually, here's how it went: the parents are Julia Sweeney and Nicholas Cage. She is obviously pregnant. She suggests several names for the baby, and he shoots down every one by figuring some convoluted way the kids on the playground will make fun of the kid. Finally, they find a name-- it's some Old English name-- that he can't manage to turn into an obsenity. Then there's a knock at the door. It's a telegram messenger with a message for "Emily and Asswipe," pronounced just how you'd expect. Messenger reads telegram of congratulations, and repeats names "Emily and Asswipe" several times. Nicholas Cage furiously grabs the telegram, and says "That's pronounced Az-wee-peh!"

People name their kids weird things, as my five years of working for public schools taught me. One couple called their daughter "Courtney," except they spelled it "Kortnee." I went to school with a Doris Morris, and a Mealie Mack Morris (not related) as well as a Toby Dick.

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Rivkah Chaya
I Saw Three Shipments


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Quote:
A FOAF's parents named him Richard, too. Way to ensure a torment-free childhood for your son, Mr. and Mrs. Head...

I saw with my own eyes a yearbook from the local high school from 1948-- there was in fact a kid named "Dick Head." Guess that expression wasn't around then.

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medtchva
Deck the Malls


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Let me add to the list... true stories from hospitals I've worked at....

Oranjello and Lemonjello (orange jello and lemon jello pronounced as 1 word)

An older lady... named Birdie Tree

My all time favorite.. pronounced AB-si-de... and spelled....

ABCDE

No kidding!

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Astra
The "Was on Sale" Song


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quote:
Originally posted by medtchva:
Let me add to the list... true stories from hospitals I've worked at....

Oranjello and Lemonjello (orange jello and lemon jello pronounced as 1 word)

Did you actually see this firsthand, or hear about it from someone else?

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This has been yet another... USELESS POST.

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Dear Babby
Deck the Malls


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My friend said that he saw this in the obituaries a few years ago. Mr Hiho (he didn't remember how it was spelled) Silva was survived by his brothers Stirling and Quick Silva.
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SilvorMoon
A View to a Krill


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My father works in one of those shops where they engrave names on plaques, trophies, dog tags, etc. He recently recieved an order for a trophy for a kid named "Darn". He was sure this was a typo, so he phoned in and asked the person who placed the order if this was correct, and they assured him that the boy's name really was spelled D-A-R-N and pronounced "Darren".
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medtchva
Deck the Malls


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quote:
Originally posted by Astra:
quote:
Originally posted by medtchva:
Let me add to the list... true stories from hospitals I've worked at....

Oranjello and Lemonjello (orange jello and lemon jello pronounced as 1 word)

Did you actually see this firsthand, or hear about it from someone else?
I actually saw these firsthand. Worked in the hospital lab and did bloodwork on them when they were born.
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fictional lie
I Saw Three Shipments


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quote:
Originally posted by medtchva:
quote:
Originally posted by Astra:
quote:
Originally posted by medtchva:
Let me add to the list... true stories from hospitals I've worked at....

Oranjello and Lemonjello (orange jello and lemon jello pronounced as 1 word)

Did you actually see this firsthand, or hear about it from someone else?
I actually saw these firsthand. Worked in the hospital lab and did bloodwork on them when they were born.
That's funny - because both of those have been touted as untrue ULs for a long time.

Don't know if this name was mentioned at all in the 10 pages (way too tired to check through them all) but there was a (governor?...senator?) from my state whose name was Dick Sweat. I thought it was hilarious he would choose that name over Richard, especially being in the public eye. Then again, I'd choose Richard or Rick or Rich over Dick any day. And that was NOT a sexual reference....

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I am nothing but I'm more than you will ever be

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TimK
I Saw Three Shipments


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Years ago when I worked in a job (which I won't specify exactly) where I was in contact with the names of large numbers of people, I ran across someone with the name Nifiteria. I always said her (I assumed this was a woman; if it was a man, God help him) parents must have been hesitating between Nefertiti and Cafeteria.

Best,
Tim

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