snopes.com Post new topic  Post a reply
search | faq | forum home

  next oldest topic   next newest topic
» Hello snopes.com » Archived Forums » Entertainment Archive » Are They Faking It?

 - UBBFriend: Email this page to someone!    
Author Topic: Are They Faking It?
JoshTee
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 102 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Okay, this is something that has bothered me for a long time. Apparently I am not the only one; I asked my girlfriend (who normally gets jealous about these sorts of things) and she too had been wondering about it. Here's the question:

When actors and actresses are doing sex scenes in a movie, are they really having sex?

A lot of it seems too real to fake. Case in point, the sex scene between Angelina Jolie and Antonio Banderas in Original Sin -- the two were married at this time to seperate people, too. As for the other end in Angelina's relationship, the sex scene in Monster's Ball between Halle Berry and Billy Bob Thornton is very realistic too. Other very looking-un-fakable ones: Jane March and Bruce Willis in Color of Night, Madonna and Willem Dafoe in Body of Evidence, Kyle MacLachlan and Elizabeth Berkley in Showgirls, and Mark Wahlberg and Julianne Moore in Boogie Nights.

I mention that they're married because another thing that has caused me to wonder about this is how do the spouses feel? Is this partially why so many Hollywood couples break up? Billy and Angelina both did very graphic, possibly real (you guys have yet to prove either way [Wink] ), sex scenes with very good looking, sex symbol-type people at almost the same time and soon after they're divroced. They went from Hollywood's closest (and probably wierdest) couple to broken up in no time, and the sex scenes just happened to have come only months before. One has to wonder if this played a part, am I right?

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
BeachLife
The Bills of St. Mary's


Icon 211 posted      Profile for BeachLife   Author's Homepage   E-mail BeachLife   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Um. let's go with no. [Roll Eyes]

--------------------
Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
Jack Dragon, On Being a Dragon
Confessions of a Dragon's scribe
Diary of my Heart Surgery

Posts: 12094 | From: Michigan | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
JoshTee
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 09 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Heh.

Well, I know this must seem like a dumb and perverted question to ask, especially since it's my first post, but it's the first thing I could think of to post here. I wanted to jump right in... excuse me if I did it the wrong way. [Big Grin]

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
BeachLife
The Bills of St. Mary's


Icon 211 posted      Profile for BeachLife   Author's Homepage   E-mail BeachLife   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Welcome to the board. You didn't do anything the wrong way.

There's many reasons why one can assume they don't really have sex. beyond that, the actors themselves sometimes explain how those seens take place.

Even if they were already a couple, who would be able to pull of a convincing love scene having real sex with all the cameras and people around, except maybe a porn star.

Welcome aboard again. Don't mind me I'm hearing cats at the moment and that sometimes makes me terse and grouchy.

Beach...or is that grouchy and terse...Life!

--------------------
Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
Jack Dragon, On Being a Dragon
Confessions of a Dragon's scribe
Diary of my Heart Surgery

Posts: 12094 | From: Michigan | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
JoshTee
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 16 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Well, Angelina I could see being able to perform like that. As could I with Billy Bob. They're both a bit off, as far as I can tell, and something tells me that not much would throw them in a situation like that. I could see this with Madonna as well, as she's been known for her sexual 'freedom'.

Forgive me if this is too much information or too graphic, but...

As far as guys go, being one myself I would find it hard (forgive the pun [Wink] ) to believe that another guy could not become aroused with a beautiful naked star on top of them, or below them, or in whatever position -- doesn't matter how many people are around. I'd guess at least half of them [guys] are comfortable enough to do this sort of thing.

I've also heard of scenes being shot with only one person around behind the camera, as I believe Kevin Smith said on the DVD An Evening With Kevin Smith. This is done when stars are shy of a scene, and I could certainly see it being done in a sex scene, meaning the stars would actually only have to 'perform' in front of only one other person, not the "large group" as mentioned before.

By the way, one of the main reasons I posted this in the first place was because I have actually heard, and not just speculated, that Madonna and Willem were indeed having sex in their scenes together. I don't remember if this was a credible source or not, though (it was a few years ago that I'd heard this), so I can't say for sure.

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
trollface
The Bills of St. Mary's


Icon 01 posted      Profile for trollface   Author's Homepage   E-mail trollface   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Most sex scenes are faked. Some are not.

I've read an interview with Asia Argento where she talks about how almost all the sex scenes in one of the films she directed were real. In fact, she talks about how she wrote some scenes simply by looking around her group of friends and thinking about who would look good having sex with each other.

The sex in Baise Moi is definately real. The two actresses in the lead roles are ex-porn stars (although I apply the prefix "ex" very loosely here), and with all the sexscenes having close-ups of penises in mouthes, penises in vaginas, cum shots, what have you, it's hard to mistake them for anything but.

--------------------
seriously , everyone on here , just trys to give someone crap about something they do !! , its shitting me to tears.

Posts: 16061 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
bananaberrybaby pie
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
I have heard male actors (can't remember which, sorry) tell embarassing stories about becoming erect during sex scenes. I suppose if they are not supposed to be erect, it is not real sex. I would guess that most (not all, but most) female actors would be against doing real sex in movies because they are not porn stars, and if there were they would be working in porn. That's just my take. I think anyone would be embarassed/not aroused with so many people around, even with a really attractive costar.

Also, Baise Moi seems a little different from your usual Hollywood movie.

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
BeachLife
The Bills of St. Mary's


Icon 211 posted      Profile for BeachLife   Author's Homepage   E-mail BeachLife   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
It's also important to note that as men age beyond their teens they generally have more control over their equipment such that unwelcome erections are much more rare.

--------------------
Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.
Jack Dragon, On Being a Dragon
Confessions of a Dragon's scribe
Diary of my Heart Surgery

Posts: 12094 | From: Michigan | Registered: Jun 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
JoshTee
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by BeachLife:
It's also important to note that as men age beyond their teens they generally have more control over their equipment such that unwelcome erections are much more rare.

Seeing as how I am still a teen, I did not know that. [Big Grin] [Razz]

Maybe that explains my fascination with this topic though, eh? [Wink]

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
MisterGrey
Little Sales Drummer Boy


Icon 01 posted      Profile for MisterGrey     Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Julianne Moore was engaged to/living with Bart Fruendlich, the father of her two children, at the time she did Boogie Nights, so I'm guessing that's a big no.
Posts: 2711 | From: Texas | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Grumpy
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 09 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by bananaberrybaby pie:
I have heard male actors (can't remember which, sorry) tell embarassing stories about becoming erect during sex scenes.

Ewan McGregor tells the tale of accidentally entering Ms. Alice Krige during a simulated humpa-humpa. (I gather this happened during the TV miniseries Scarlet & Black.)

--Grump "pardon my light-saber, ma'am" y

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
resELution
Markdown, the Herald Angels Sing


Icon 01 posted      Profile for resELution   E-mail resELution   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
On the second OT about sex sceans with others being hard on relationships, I can see how it would be.

Yes, in most cases except the X-rated they are faking it. But what would you think if you just made love to your wife and saw a sex scean she did the next day and she was doing the same thing *groaning or whatever*? You'd think, "Was she faking it last night too?" [Eek!]

Or what would I think if I saw a video of my husband having *sex* with another woman, and he's like, "But we were just rubbin' our naughty bits together like make-belive!" comforting words, I'm sure. [Roll Eyes]

My final verdict, real or not it'd take a very detatched couple not to be disturbed by sceans like that.

Posts: 2286 | From: Washington State | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
The Eyeball Kid
Deck the Malls


Icon 01 posted      Profile for The Eyeball Kid     Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by resEbellLution:
On the second OT about sex sceans with others being hard on relationships, I can see how it would be.

Yes, in most cases except the X-rated they are faking it. But what would you think if you just made love to your wife and saw a sex scean she did the next day and she was doing the same thing *groaning or whatever*? You'd think, "Was she faking it last night too?" [Eek!]

Or what would I think if I saw a video of my husband having *sex* with another woman, and he's like, "But we were just rubbin' our naughty bits together like make-belive!" comforting words, I'm sure. [Roll Eyes]

My final verdict, real or not it'd take a very detatched couple not to be disturbed by sceans like that.

Errr. Nah. Just a couple who TRUSTS each other, and understands that film is art, and art is a form of expression, and expressing sex is something as old as art itself. A spouse who does not understand this has absolutely no business being married to an actor/actress. Oddly, as mentioned before, one actor who pops to mind is Billy Bob Thorton, who is not afraid to embrace the "dark", or gothic, nature of art and expression.

As for the OP, the answer should be "sometimes". Probably one of the most famous scenes where sex was not simulated was in "Eyes Wide Shut" - it was a huge deal for a director of such stature (Stanely Kubrick) to be so forward in his approach.

As far as the Madonna sex scene, I recall her quote about not letting Willem look her in the eyes, and that she had to squelch her dry heaves when he touched her. Not exactly something that would have been consented.

The Billy Bob Thorton scene with Halle Berry was highly rumoured among the literary circles (I assume you're referring to the movie "Monster's Ball) to have been "no so simulated", whatever the hell that means. Berry was indeed compensated an extra one million dollars for the extended scene.

This is sort of a munchkin for me, though. Art sometimes needs to be as close to real life as possible. Actually, all the time...with exception to pop-film-culture, where sex is used as a time filler and a ploy for ticket boosts.

--------------------
I gotta keep movin' while I still can / I got a two-pack habit and a motel tan. --Steve Earle

Posts: 425 | From: very close to a snoring black pug. | Registered: Jun 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Bushrat
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 105 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Errr. Nah. Just a couple who TRUSTS each other, and understands that film is art, and art is a form of expression, and expressing sex is something as old as art itself. A spouse who does not understand this has absolutely no business being married to an actor/actress. [/QB]
There are plenty of us couples who trust each other and understand what art is... who would never be comfortable with our partner being with someone else, fake or not. Understanding art does not make one automatically okay with it. People are different.
IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Screaming Blues Murder Jam
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
If it was so easy for an actor to get arroused when film a sex scene then there wouldn't be so few reliable male porn stars. Every man thinks it would be easy just to have sex with a woman on set but when they get down to it... well they just can't get down to it. Some part of your brain doesn't accept it as a 'sex' situation and you don't get arroused. Maybe it's all the sweaty camera crew around you, maybe it's concentrating on staying in character or listening to the director shouting instructions, but most find it hard to let go.

Those that CAN do it, and pack 7" plus, are very highly valued.

Plus, sex scenes take HOURS to film. There's constant stopping and starting to adjust the lighting etc. The novelty of the physical contact quickly palls.

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
greg writes
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 14 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by JoshTee:
I mention that they're married because another thing that has caused me to wonder about this is how do the spouses feel? Is this partially why so many Hollywood couples break up? Billy and Angelina both did very graphic, possibly real (you guys have yet to prove either way [Wink] ), sex scenes with very good looking, sex symbol-type people at almost the same time and soon after they're divroced. They went from Hollywood's closest (and probably wierdest) couple to broken up in no time, and the sex scenes just happened to have come only months before.

This question hinges on the perception of the "masses." We see a steamy sex scene in a new release one month, then one of its stars hops a train to "splitsville" with their movie-star spouse soon after. It does convey the perception of "cause-and-effect."

However, the time between the filming of the scene and the date of its release can be months ... sometimes even more than a year (if the studio wants to save it for a key season like summer or Christmas).

The stars also know that the sex scene will be a part of movie long before they shoot it ... specifically when they first receive the script and accept the role.

Basically, the spouses have plenty of time to come to grips with the fact that their other-halves will be involved with this type of scene. Moreover, two actors who are married to each other are probably better equiped to deal with their spouse doing a sex scene. The movie set is their "office," and it's just work.

Not many Hollywood marriages make it to 10, 15 or 20 year anniversaries. That's why they're called Hollywood marriages. Many actors take their nuptuals to boost their image (Tom Cruise and Nichole Kidman come to mind). But the demands of acting pulls each in different directions for months at a time.

There are plenty of actor-couples who NEVER had one person involved in a steamy sex scene who broke up ( Divorce, Hollywood Style)

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
AliBaba
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


Icon 14 posted      Profile for AliBaba   E-mail AliBaba   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Josh, what is it you think actors do for a living? Isn't part of it convincing us that they're doing something that they're really not? When an actor is playing a horribly convincing rape scene, do you think he's actually raping the other actor/actress? Do you think they fill an actor up with booze to play a drunk scene? Of course not. A good actor can be very, very convincing playing someone who is drunk or stoned - that's what they do.

Unless you actually see penis entering vagina, (in which case, I'd guess you're watching porn), then what you're seeing is great acting, not great sex. (Or great direction, great lighting, great editing, whatever.)

And yes, some movies have much more realistic and believable sex scenese than others. Again, I think you're doing the actors and crew a disservice to assume that they're actually having intercourse. And you're doing their respective spouses an even greater disservice to assume that they haven't yet learned the difference between acting and true passion.

Which is not to say that they don't sometimes have difficulty with it. Several actors have commented on the trouble they sometimes have watching their spouse/SO making love to another man or woman on the set. But it's one thing to feel a twinge watching your spouse/SO interact with another actor. It's another thing altogether to file for divorce over it.

Ali "Lights! Camera! Lawsuit!" Baba

Posts: 3068 | From: Kensington, MD | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
resELution
Markdown, the Herald Angels Sing


Icon 01 posted      Profile for resELution   E-mail resELution   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
I think you and I agree alot on this one Ali Baba.

The sex sceans, real or not may have a negative effect on the spouse, but there's no proof that said sex sceans are the reason for divorces. Especially, like greg writes said, in a climate as volitile as Hollywood.

Posts: 2286 | From: Washington State | Registered: Aug 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
JoshTee
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by Screaming Blues Murder Jam:
If it was so easy for an actor to get arroused when film a sex scene then there wouldn't be so few reliable male porn stars. Every man thinks it would be easy just to have sex with a woman on set but when they get down to it... well they just can't get down to it. Some part of your brain doesn't accept it as a 'sex' situation and you don't get arroused. Maybe it's all the sweaty camera crew around you, maybe it's concentrating on staying in character or listening to the director shouting instructions, but most find it hard to let go.

While I think that what you said is a small part of it, I think that there are many more reasons why there are so few "valued" pornstars. A few of these reasons being:

- You're having sex with many women in a short period of time. That tends to make a person not as easily aroused.
- Drugs take over.
- You're doing "your stuff" and you've gotta stop and pause and get the position someone else wants to see, etc.
- You have to have endurance. Overweight people, which make up a fairly high percentage of the Western world, are disqualified by the dozens for this reason.
- In a lot of cases, with notable exceptions like Ron Jeremy, they're looking for thinner, good-looking guys.
- It's against some people's morals.

... And so on. I would say that the thing you're saying could be a part of it, but I definately wouldn't say that a lot of actors and actresses couldn't have sex in front of a camera and in a room with a few people for that one reason.

quote:
Originally posted by greg writes:
This question hinges on the perception of the "masses." We see a steamy sex scene in a new release one month, then one of its stars hops a train to "splitsville" with their movie-star spouse soon after. It does convey the perception of "cause-and-effect."

However, the time between the filming of the scene and the date of its release can be months ... sometimes even more than a year (if the studio wants to save it for a key season like summer or Christmas).

I seem to remember a year or two ago Halle Berry giving an interview to a magazine or television station and Halle talking about her scene in Monster's Ball. In this interview she said something like, "my husband got to hear about it, but this is the first time he has seen it and it's hard on him. I think it's great he's been so cool about it." Point being, you can hear about these sorts of things all you want, but a lot of times it's when you see it that it actually hurts you. Hell, I could hear about people being shot in the face (see: R. Budd Dwyer), but chances are I won't get too shaken up about it until I see a video.

I would say, for that reason, that it is still possible for couples to break up after the release of a movie, even if the film had been shot many months (or sometimes years) prior.

quote:
Originally posted by AliBaba:
Josh, what is it you think actors do for a living? Isn't part of it convincing us that they're doing something that they're really not? When an actor is playing a horribly convincing rape scene, do you think he's actually raping the other actor/actress? Do you think they fill an actor up with booze to play a drunk scene? Of course not. A good actor can be very, very convincing playing someone who is drunk or stoned - that's what they do.

You're just being silly about this. I happen to know a LOT about movies, perhaps more than most people here (don't want to assume or anything, but I know I certainly know a lot for my age and location), only this is a subject that is not touched on all too often. Type in "sex scenes, actors actresses, real" into Yahoo! and you had better have a lot of time on your hands if you want to try to find the answer to this question -- all you're going to get is porn sites. I brought this question here to find out if there were any specific instances anyone had heard of. In fact, to prove you wrong a bit, people have thought of real instances... so I wasn't crazy in starting this topic.

I'd just like to say now that I realize that most scenes in movies are being faked. I started this topic to distinguish between the two (real and fake), as obviously there is a BIG difference and there is a history of both in the movies.

But please, from now on you should stick more to the topic and not insult or assume anything about my intelligence.

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
trollface
The Bills of St. Mary's


Icon 01 posted      Profile for trollface   Author's Homepage   E-mail trollface   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by JoshTee:
But please, from now on you should stick more to the topic and not insult or assume anything about my intelligence.

Woah, woah, woah, there, horsie.

Ali was merely saying that by far the vast majority of sex scenes are simulated and not real. I'd say that after 8 posts, you're probably not in a position to throw your weight around, and lecture people about board etiquette.

--------------------
seriously , everyone on here , just trys to give someone crap about something they do !! , its shitting me to tears.

Posts: 16061 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
AliBaba
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


Icon 19 posted      Profile for AliBaba   E-mail AliBaba   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Thanks, trollface, as always. Would that all gentlemen were as gallant as you, sir. [Wink]

But Josh, I certainly never intended to insult your intelligence. All I was saying was exactly as trollface says - that in the vast majority of love scenes, the actors are acting. How many times have we seen an actor in an interview talking about how horribly unromantic it is to have all the technicians, lighting folks, director, AD's, sound folks, etc around.

However, after reading my post again, I realize I need to make a correction. I guess I should have said usually they don't fill an actor with booze to play a drunk scene.

I just remembered that on, IIRC, "Inside the Actors Studio", Martin Sheen talked about the fact that he was hammered during the filming of his drunk scene in "Apolcolypse Now". But to be real honest, I don't consider that acting. I consider that documenting. Basically, he was drunk, and Coppola rolled camera on it.

And, as we know, there are cases where actors have met on the set of a film or TV show and have fallen for each other, and indeed left spouses for the new person. But I don't think that amounts to evidence that any love scene between them was real.

However, I do remember Barbara Hershey claiming that her love scene with David Carradine in the forgettable "Boxcar Bertha" was quite real. Thanks, Barbara...major over-share there, hon.

Anyway, sorry to have raised your hackles, Josh. No offense intended, I was just trying to answer your question.

Ali "wonder if the love scene between Heather Graham and Fat Bastard was real?" Baba

Posts: 3068 | From: Kensington, MD | Registered: Feb 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Belletrist
Deck the Malls


Icon 01 posted      Profile for Belletrist   E-mail Belletrist   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
I remember reading long ago an interview or article on Halle Berry. It mentioned her love scene with Billy Bob Thornton and the fact that both actors had paper pieces covering their genitalia. I'll see if I can dig up the article in question.

--------------------
There's no sense beating a dead horse- but if you've reached the point where you even seriously consider that abusing a dead animal might improve your lot in life, I say go ahead and give it a shot. --Anthony Myers

Posts: 266 | From: BC, Canada | Registered: Mar 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Martha Washington
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Errr. Nah. Just a couple who TRUSTS each other, and understands that film is art, and art is a form of expression, and expressing sex is something as old as art itself. A spouse who does not understand this has absolutely no business being married to an actor/actress.
Agree wholeheartedly. A actor "accidentally" entered a actress? Is that his story? [Roll Eyes]
IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
MisterGrey
Little Sales Drummer Boy


Icon 604 posted      Profile for MisterGrey     Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
I think you'd have to have a relationship as solid as fucking cement in order to keep your marriage nicely in tact when one partner faked sex in front of a camera for all the world to see. I mean, you can write all you want about how hard it is, which is true, but nevertheless, wouldn't it be eating at you that they were enjoying it? And "getting away" with it? When you do scenes like that, you come to know that person, intimately, in detail, and that isn't something light. And if they're good at what they do, and they're just "faking" on camera, what's to prevent them from doing the same in the sack?
Posts: 2711 | From: Texas | Registered: Sep 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Screaming Blues Murder Jam
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Joshtee, looks really aren't that important for a male pornstar. The men watching don't care what the guys look like, it comes down to the 'actors' female porn stars like working with.

You mentioned Ron Jeremy - why do you think he's been so successful for so long? He doesn't even have the biggest cock (Jeff Stryker?). It's partly because he's reliable - people know he can
1) get wood and
2) keep wood.
Anyway, some of the reasons you say there are fewer male pornstars would also apply to why men don't do it for real in legit movies (changing angles etc). And there are plenty men with morals loose enough to do it. If it was that then it would mean that since there are more female than male pornstars women have looser morals!

Also, without loads of lube or foreplay for the woman, it makes it more difficult for the guy to get it inside her in the first place.

If the actor wanted to stop it happening he'd just tape it to his stomach, out the way. And most actors performing a nude scene where a little stuck on pouch anyway. Will Smith said he wore one in Wild Wild West (what was 'Big Willie' trying to hide?)

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
JoshTee
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 01 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by trollface:
I'd say that after 8 posts, you're probably not in a position to throw your weight around, and lecture people about board etiquette.

All bragging aside, believe me, friend, I am no discussion forum lightweight. I have posted at probably over twenty boards and I have been doing it for about five or six years now. For almost a year I have been running a forum on my own with absoultely zero funding and all members coming to the site through respect for my "posting achievements." Point being, I know "board etiquette" whether you wish to acknowledge it or not. I'm not here to preach about it, but in that last post I had simply replied to a post that offended me. What's wrong with that? I need a higher Snopes post count before I am allowed to express personal feelings?

What irked me about Ali's post is that, while he may have been trying to tell me that "the vast majority of sex scenes are simulated and not real," he was saying things like, "do you think that the actor/actress is actually being raped in a rape scene?" ... as if to assume I knew nothing about movies or life, even. To make a poor analogy, it'd be like me saying to you, "I bet you don't even know who the President of the United States is!" It's insulting through insinuating that the subject wouldn't know common knowledge.

Ali, I very much appreciate your apology, though. I'm glad you realized that, whether you meant it or not, you had offended me.

... and I used to think of myself as a person that wasn't easily offended. [Frown]

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
the Virgin Marrya
Let There Be PCs on Earth


Icon 01 posted      Profile for the Virgin Marrya     Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Funny, I read it as a universal 'you' rather than a personal 'YOU!'.
my 5 c

in response to Bartleby - I think it's a different proposition (no pun intended) if an actor is in a heavy sex scene that they have disccussed in advance with their SO - when they first accept the part, they know how much nudity/sex etc there will be, so there is POTENTIAL for full and informed consent on both sides. Not to assume that all actors consult, of course, but, I'd say that if I were a SO that would be bothered by a full on hot scene, I'd ask my actor-husband to either turn down the part, or ask if it could be toned down a tad.

oh look, now thats 10 c [Smile]

--------------------
Windows cannot open this file. To open this file correctly, defenestrate, then try running the file again...

Posts: 5383 | From: New Zealand | Registered: Jan 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
trollface
The Bills of St. Mary's


Icon 01 posted      Profile for trollface   Author's Homepage   E-mail trollface   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
quote:
Originally posted by JoshTee:
Point being, I know "board etiquette" whether you wish to acknowledge it or not.

Ettiquette on this board, not boards in general.

quote:
I'm not here to preach about it, but in that last post I had simply replied to a post that offended me. What's wrong with that?
Nothing whatsoever.

quote:
I need a higher Snopes post count before I am allowed to express personal feelings?
Nope. What that bit was about how you told Ali off for not sticking to the topic. You're a newbie, so you probably don't realise but going OT is hardly frowned upon here. Quite the opposite, if anything. I was merely suggesting that before you told people what was or was not acceptable on this message board that maybe you should have waited a while until you knew for yourself.

From having your own message board, I'm sure you know how you'd feel if someone came along and used their 8th post to lecture someone about doing something that is a normal board occurence.

Oh, Ali's female, BTW.

All that said, no hard feelings. May we have conversations that are less confrontational in the future.

Oh, and, welcome to the boards.

Posts: 16061 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2000  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
JoshTee
The Red and the Green Stamps


Icon 207 posted            Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Thank you. [Big Grin]

For the record, though, and I may have written it poorly the first time, but what I was trying to say is "stick more to the topic than insult my intelligence." More as though I was giving her a healthy alternative to saying things that had offended me. I wasn't actually trying to spout Snopes rules at all. [Smile]

Yeah, anyway, back to the topic... [Big Grin]

IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
snoozn
Deck the Malls


Icon 09 posted      Profile for snoozn   E-mail snoozn   Send new private message       Edit/Delete post   Reply with quote 
Sorry for bumping up a subject that seemed to have been finished, but I need to plunk down my 2 cents! I don't think this is such a black and white issue as some are making it out to be. It's not a choice between "actors are acting and while they pretend to have sex are probably feeling no emotion whatsoever" or "they're really having intercourse and falling in love". Actors are different just like everyone else and can fall anywhere between these 2 extremes. It seems likely to me that most of them feel some emotions during these scenes: embarassment, excitement, worry, etc. I'm not sure what seems so magical about penetration to many people such that it defines whether you are having sex. Two naked (or nearly naked) bodies rubbing against each other and kissing and hands caressing is a sexual experience too. That doesn't mean it is enjoyable or not, but I would think it's going to bring out strong emotions in the actors, the spouses or significant others, and maybe even the crew who actually see it "live". I also think it's probably a part of the reason that Hollywood marriages break up, but not at all the main reason. The whole Hollywood lifestyle is so different from normal and there are many reasons a Hollywood marriage is probably less stable than a "normal" marriage. OK, there you have it, my 2 cents!

snoozn

Posts: 423 | From: Colorado | Registered: Oct 2001  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
   

Quick Reply
Message:

HTML is not enabled.
UBB Code™ is enabled.

Instant Graemlins
   


Post new topic  Post a reply Close topic   Feature Topic   Move Topic   Delete topic next oldest topic   next newest topic
 - Printer-friendly view of this topic
Hop To:


Urban Legends Reference Pages

Powered by Infopop Corporation
UBB.classic™ 6.7.2