posted
I was just reading This article in the Globe and Mail about a whether to take your shoes off when you show up as a guest at someone's home. Curiously it mentioned that this was a cultural practice, with Americans tending not to, and Canadians tending to. I thought I'd see your thoughts on the matter. Please post your comments and do the poll.
Poll Information
This poll contains 4 question(s). 153 user(s) have voted. You may not view the results of this poll without voting.
-------------------- a moment for old friends now estranged, victims of the flux of alliances and changing perceptions. There was something there once, and that something is worth honoring as well. - John Carroll Posts: 3375 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
It seems pretty obvious to me - most of Canada exhibits enough of a seasonal change that people don't wear their winter boots (or even in the case of BC and its snowless winter, their rain-soaked shoes), inside their own house, or someone else's house for that matter.
-------------------- "The fate of *billions* depends on you! Hahahahaha....sorry." Lord Raiden - Mortal Kombat Posts: 1587 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Apr 2005
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posted
I think it depends on a lot of things, such as whether or not you are close friends with the person you are visiting, how long you plan to stay, and if it's pretty obvious that the taking off of shoes are a requirement. (shoes are littered by the front door, or a sign in the entryway)
At my house i encourage people to leave their shoes on. Who knows what will just out from under the couch and attack you?
kmcm
-------------------- Of course this land is dangerous! All of the animals are capably murderous. Especially the penguins.
i'm a figment of my own imagination, sometimes i don't exist Posts: 1099 | From: Kitsap County, WA | Registered: Oct 2002
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posted
Unless it is a cultural requirement or the personal preference of the host, I say keep your shoes on.
-------------------- "I believe you believe that, but I just think you're confused." Posts: 311 | From: Mississippi | Registered: Jan 2006
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quote:Originally posted by Hero_Mike: It seems pretty obvious to me - most of Canada exhibits enough of a seasonal change that people don't wear their winter boots (or even in the case of BC and its snowless winter, their rain-soaked shoes), inside their own house, or someone else's house for that matter.
Yep, you've pretty much got it right.
We've had these discussion before and believe it or not they can get heated. In the United States there are some major and regional differences. It is very commont to take one's shoes off when entering a house here in Michigan. And before this gets ugly, let me just say it's just what we do, not something that the host or hostess generally insists on.
posted
heh, we've had this discussion a bunch of times before. Usually it comes down to most of us thinking it's related to weather and manners. (At least I sort of remember having that kind of conversation with BeachLife.)
Unless I've just come in from rain or slushy snow, I keep my shoes on (in someone else's home) and expect guests to do the same. But it wouldn't bother me if they took their shoes off either. At home I rarely wear shoes, sometimes not even socks, so I don't care what people wear as long as they're comfy.
-------------------- 28 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, and 12 seconds. That is when the world will end. Posts: 7158 | From: D.C. | Registered: Aug 2002
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posted
I'm with everyone else. I keep my shoes on unless asked to removed them or if there's a sign. That said, it occurs to me that if I had muddy shoes and nothing to slip in to, I'd remove my shoes out of common courtesy.
-------------------- LOVE: the condition in which the welfare and happiness of another become essential to your own. -Jubal Harshaw Posts: 89 | From: Eagle Rock, Virginia | Registered: Sep 2005
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posted
I feel it's definetly a cultural thing. I would almost never remove my shoes at another persons house back in the UK. But here there is a srong bias toward shoe removal.
-------------------- Focus On The Family- An opinion group who think more about Gay Sex than gay people do- Rick Mercer Posts: 590 | From: Rawdon, Quebec | Registered: Nov 2005
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posted
I always take them off if they're wet/dirty. I'll take them off if the host and any other guests do not have them on. If your floor is really nasty with pet hair and sticky spills, don't expect it!! If I'm dressed nicely, I won't take dry/clean shoes off. No one wants to see my panty hose and toenails! Asain household... ALWAYS!
That reminds me. Our friend from Hong Kong was helping us move. He and DH were carrying a HEAVY desk through our back door and he took his shoes off while balancing the desk. I told him not to worry about it, but he wouldn't listen. Silly guy.
-------------------- Never eat anything given to you by a toddler. Posts: 258 | From: Rochester, NY | Registered: Aug 2006
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posted
I generally take my own shoes off in my flat, but I don't ask others to do the same. I prefer having my feet "loose".
In England, it could be either. I really don't think there's any kind of consensus on the issue. Generally speaking, I'd keep them on in other people's houses as the default option, but don't consider it at all rude to be asked to take them off. If there were masses of shoes by the front door, I'd ask the host whether they wanted me to take them off or not.
-------------------- seriously , everyone on here , just trys to give someone crap about something they do !! , its shitting me to tears. Posts: 16061 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2000
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posted
The culture here is to remove shoes and to wear house shoes, if so desired. My banker came to my house last December and she wanted to remove her shoes as we have wood floors. I told it she could leave her shoes on as I needed to clean the floor anyway.
Even my neighbors with tile floors never wear outside shoes inside.
-------------------- "Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands - and then eat just one of the pieces." Judith Viorst Posts: 1082 | From: Luzern, Switzerland | Registered: Jan 2005
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posted
Here in the rural South, we only wear shoes about 3 months a year anyway. Most other times its flip flops and sandals which are kicked off when entering anothers home. Who would want those dirty things tracking up my double wide anyway?
-------------------- A woman needs a man like fish needs a bicycle....People don't care how much you know, but they know how much you care. Posts: 50 | From: Huntsville, AL | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
If it's someone I know fairly well, I'll take my shoes off just because I hate the feeling of shoes on my feet.
Posts: 494 | From: Epping, Essex, UK | Registered: Sep 2005
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posted
Here in the rural South, we only wear shoes about 3 months a year anyway. Most other times its flip flops and sandals which are kicked off when entering anothers home. Who would want those dirty things tracking up my double wide anyway?
-------------------- A woman needs a man like fish needs a bicycle....People don't care how much you know, but they know how much you care. Posts: 50 | From: Huntsville, AL | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
I almost always remove my shoes eventually, especially if I am in heels. I think it must be regional because I have lived in KS and MO my whole life and, while no one bats an eye if you keep your shoes on, it is also very commonplace to take them off. Some friends I have from Boston call the practice "honky tonk" and maybe it is, but I am a shoe remover (unless, of course, I feel like the host/hostess is very against this practice, which I have never come across). I would also like to point out that I have impeccably groomed feet. No one wants to see nasty, hairy, dirty feet under any circumstances!
Then again, I would be barefoot all the time if I could be. The first thing I do when I walk into my house at night is take off my shoes and socks. Most of my backwoods, honky tonk friends and family are the same way. But I don't insist that other people do in my home. I prefer them to be comfortable, whether that is shoes-on or shoes-off.
-------------------- "I bet a funny thing about driving a car off a cliff is, while you're in midair, you still hit those brakes. Hey, better try the emergency brake." -Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey Posts: 245 | From: Gladstone, MO | Registered: Apr 2006
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quote:Originally posted by kmcm: I think it depends on a lot of things, such as whether or not you are close friends with the person you are visiting, how long you plan to stay, and if it's pretty obvious that the taking off of shoes are a requirement. (shoes are littered by the front door, or a sign in the entryway)
I think most of these factors are true. For example, if I'm wearing flip-flops over to a friend's house, I'm going to immediately remove them upon entering. If I'm stopping at a client's house and not intending to stay more than a few minutes, I'll leave my shoes on unless asked not to.
It also depends on the type of shoe I'm wearing. Flip flops are easily stepped out of, but lace-up boots would require me to sit on the floor for a minute to remove them. I wouldn't do that unless I knew the person well and was planning to stay for a while.
However, in Florida most people leave their flip-flops at the door, and wearing shoes at casual home gatherings seems odd to me.
-------------------- "There is no constitutional right to sleep with endangered reptiles." -- Carl Hiaasen Won't somebody please think of the adults! Posts: 8254 | From: Florida | Registered: Oct 2002
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guruwan2b
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV
posted
Last Thanksgiving we went to my BIL's new house. Everyone was going around in sock, so we took our shoes off. They weren't dirty or wet, we just wanted to protect their new carpet/flooring. At home, I will go to my bedroom and take my shoes off/put on house shoes. but I don't do that at the front door.... then again I generally enter through the back door and will take off dirty/wet shoes in the laundry room. So I guess I am with the weather-dictates crew.
-------------------- Too much of this navel gazing and we'll disappear up our own arses. Danvers Carew Posts: 7465 | From: Oklahoma | Registered: Oct 2001
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a. I'm asked b. I see that my host is shoe-less c. There is a sign on the door
Part of my job is home service for PCs and Macs, and I'm often asked to remove my shoes. I carry disposable booties for that purpose. (Boss says it's an OSHA thing to have the feet covered while on the job)
posted
I will take off my shoes if I am specifically requested to, or if it's mucky, snowy, or wet outside and I don't want to wreck people's floors. Otherwise, I would consider it impolite, as I know some people don't care for feet and find even stockinged feet off-putting.
If I feel like it, I'll take off my shoes when visiting people I am close to, people who I know won't mind.
-------------------- "That would be really dangerous, you know. Indiscriminately extricating someone from the petrified corpse of a supernatural creature." - My Husband Posts: 4308 | From: Massachusetts | Registered: Jun 2003
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posted
I have no problem removing my shoes is the hostess seems to prefer it that way, or if it's a casual visit. In more formal gatherings I've always understood that it was rude to go around in stocking feet.
However, I need advice on the etiquitte of my husband's feet. He digs ditches all day, so his shoes are usually very muddy right after work. However, this means his socks are also wet and stained from the mud. If we're expecting to go somewhere, I try to bring along extra shoes & socks for him, but there I times we don't. So...would you prefer muddy shoes in your house, or icky wet socks?
-------------------- "I find in myself desires which nothing in this earth can satisfy, the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world." C.S. Lewis Posts: 57 | From: Texas | Registered: Sep 2006
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posted
I always ask what they prefer before I enter. If they don't care then I just do what everyone else is doing.
Posts: 835 | From: Massachusetts | Registered: Feb 2004
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quote:Originally posted by erinker74: I almost always remove my shoes eventually, especially if I am in heels. I think it must be regional because I have lived in KS and MO my whole life and, while no one bats an eye if you keep your shoes on, it is also very commonplace to take them off. Some friends I have from Boston call the practice "honky tonk" and maybe it is, but I am a shoe remover (unless, of course, I feel like the host/hostess is very against this practice, which I have never come across). I would also like to point out that I have impeccably groomed feet. No one wants to see nasty, hairy, dirty feet under any circumstances!
Then again, I would be barefoot all the time if I could be. The first thing I do when I walk into my house at night is take off my shoes and socks. Most of my backwoods, honky tonk friends and family are the same way. But I don't insist that other people do in my home. I prefer them to be comfortable, whether that is shoes-on or shoes-off.
Yup, me too. (except for the KS and MO part.)
If it's obvious I need to keep them on, I will, but otherwise, off they go.
I don't care what people do in my house as long as they are happy. - unless their shoes were muddy or something. In which case I would offer them houseshoes.
-------------------- "Wolves, dragons and vampires, man. Draw the nut-bars like big ol' nut-bar magnets." ~evilrabbit
(snurched because one of my nutbar family members is all about wolves and another one is all about dragons...)(with apologies to surfcitydogdad) Posts: 2397 | From: Texarkana, TX | Registered: Mar 2006
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posted
It reminds me of that sex and the city episode where they have to take their shoes off, and the one girl - SJP's character - comes back at the end of the night to find that someone stole her shoes! Since htey were expensive pumps, like $400 or something, she held the host liable and made her replace them. That was the argument in that shoe: whether the host, upon requiring shoe removal, is therefore liable for the shoes?
But, more important question. I wanted to put this in the poll, but I forgot.
Once a guy made fun of me and my stuffy accountant nature by saying "callee, I bet you're even the kind of guy who brings his slippers with him to change into when you visit someone's house."
I had trouble understanding the insult, because more times than not I do bring my slipper! I mean, I have nice slippers, nice leather mocs, and they are comfortable and good looking. I don't enjoy walking around in bare or sock feet; I do feel kinda "naked" and my feet get cold. Having slippers to change into ensures my comfort. I didn't think this was that odd of a thing to do, but the guy insulting me seemed to be under the impression that it was self-evidently wierd. So, what are your comments?
-------------------- a moment for old friends now estranged, victims of the flux of alliances and changing perceptions. There was something there once, and that something is worth honoring as well. - John Carroll Posts: 3375 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Mar 2004
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posted
Until the first time we had one of these threads, I had no idea that people actually wore their shoes inside their homes. It was one of those little things I always found unrealistic about television shows and movies and I was quite astounded to find out that people come in from outdoors and walk around in the shoes they were wearing outside.
In my experience, it's assumed here that shoes come off. I've never encountered anything to the contrary. I would have great difficulty going into someone's home with my shoes on, particularly if they have carpeting or rugs down, unless I had some indoor-only shoes to put on. Most homes here have an area immediately inside the door for removing outerwear, including shoes. Service people automatically take them off at the door or slip booties on unless they're told not to worry about it. Sometimes they ask if their shoes are okay, but never in the winter or if it's wet outside.
-------------------- "You're the opposite of troll. It's a compliment!" Posts: 12086 | From: Alberta | Registered: Feb 2000
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quote:Originally posted by Silken Ray: If it's someone I know fairly well, I'll take my shoes off just because I hate the feeling of shoes on my feet.
This is, of course, a good point. In some people's houses it's considered rude and presumptuous to take your shoes off.
-------------------- seriously , everyone on here , just trys to give someone crap about something they do !! , its shitting me to tears. Posts: 16061 | From: UK | Registered: Sep 2000
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posted
Growing up in South Carolina, we would always take our shoes off before entering our house. As LongTallBlonde mentioned, we were usually wearing sandals, flip flops, or clogs which you could just step out of at the door. The main reason we did this was because of the evil that is red clay. Most of our yard was composed of this stuff and the less you got inside the better. Once this stuff stains something, whether tile, carpet, or clothes, it is pretty much impossible to get out. I spent most of childhood with socks and shoes that were always slightly orange.
-------------------- "Tis too much proved that with devotion's visage and pious action we do sugar o'er the devil himself." - Hamlet Posts: 344 | From: Pittsburgh, PA | Registered: Jun 2006
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posted
No, not weird I think, I almost started a poll about that as well, since the globe and mail also reported that 33% of people have sex with their socks on, while the majority thought keeping socks on was terrible. Personally, I think I'd prefer socks off, but if you're in the middle of a cold canadian winter...
-------------------- a moment for old friends now estranged, victims of the flux of alliances and changing perceptions. There was something there once, and that something is worth honoring as well. - John Carroll Posts: 3375 | From: Ontario, Canada | Registered: Mar 2004
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quote:Originally posted by callee: I didn't think this was that odd of a thing to do, but the guy insulting me seemed to be under the impression that it was self-evidently wierd. So, what are your comments?
It is self evidently stuffy. One might even go so far as to say "prissy". Posts: 96 | From: Attleboro, MA | Registered: Nov 2006
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quote:Originally posted by callee: Having slippers to change into ensures my comfort. I didn't think this was that odd of a thing to do, but the guy insulting me seemed to be under the impression that it was self-evidently wierd. So, what are your comments?
Not weird at all. I have friends who regularly travel with slippers like yours for just that reason. I don't wear slippers, but I do often travel with an extra pair of socks because I know it's likely my feet will get cold, especially if I'm wearing stockings; outfit be damned!
-------------------- "You're the opposite of troll. It's a compliment!" Posts: 12086 | From: Alberta | Registered: Feb 2000
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posted
I never take my shoes of unless they're dirty or I'm asked to by my hosts. I used to walk barefoot a lot when I still lived in a house with a garden though. That changed when I moved and had to put on shoes everytime I wanted to go outside for five minutes, and by now I feel naked when I take my shoes off.
That's not a cultural thing, mind you -- I have friends who keep their shoes on and friends who take them off the second they step through a door.
Posts: 315 | From: Berlin, Germany | Registered: Mar 2005
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quote:Originally posted by callee: Once a guy made fun of me and my stuffy accountant nature by saying "callee, I bet you're even the kind of guy who brings his slippers with him to change into when you visit someone's house."
I might be offended if you came over and brought shoes to change into. If you said, "My feet get too cold when I'm just wearing socks," that'd be alright. Otherwise I'd think you thought I was a horrible housekeeper and you couldn't bear for your precious socks to touch my floor.
I generally don't mind taking off my shoes at other people's houses, but when I was in high school and wearing Doc Martens all the time it was a pain in the ass. I'd always think, "If you told me before I came over, I could've worn different shoes and you wouldn't be standing around waiting for me to lace up."
I also don't like it when you have to take off your shoes when you're just coming in for a minute. I can understand doing it if your shoes are dripping wet or muddy, but I've been asked to unshoe on nice sunny days when I'm just coming over to pick something up. I spent more time taking off and putting on my shoes than on the reason for my visit.
Hardly anyone around here makes you take off your shoes, unless they've just had the carpets shampooed. I prefer going shoeless, but I'll only do that if I know the host won't mind.
ET fix stray apostrophe
-------------------- I can't put my arms down! Posts: 273 | From: California | Registered: Feb 2006
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posted
I don't take my shoes off. I've only been asked to once and it lead to a pretty miserable evening because the host's house was cold and there wasn't enough seating.
Ever since my foot surgery I'm even less inclined to remove shoes. Both cold and stubbed toes hurt a lot more than they used to.
I tell guests to do whatever makes them comfortable.
Posts: 1168 | From: Missouri | Registered: Oct 2005
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posted
Here it's quite the rarity to keep your shoes on. it's actually considered "rude and presumptuous" to wear shoes in someones house. I was taken aback when my grandfather-in-law told me to keep my shoes on when I visited him for the first time, (not wanting to offend I kept them on, but was afraid it was in case he wanted to throw me to the curb that much faster .
It's actually a bit social here as well, wearing shoes indoors implys that you're in a hurry to leave. at least around here. same as leaving your jacket on, (even if it's cold in the house) It is a very regional thing, as you can go to pretty much any home in Alberta and see shoes at the door.
Posts: 153 | From: Edmonton, Alberta, Canada | Registered: Dec 2004
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