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Author Topic: How to kill a wolf
snopes
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Comment: Our pastor used the following story as a sermon illustration:

*****

Story: How to Kill a Wolf - (Eskimo Style)

Up in the arctic circle there is tribe of Eskimo's who have learned to set
a very simple yet effective trap for wolves. First they sharpen a knife
razor sharp. Then they dip it in the blood of a seal they have killed.
(you see seals are fairly easy to trap but wolves are very dangerous).
After dipping the knife in blood they set it outside in the cold so the
blood freezes on the knife. After if freezes (a matter of minutes) they
dip it again into the seal blood and again take it out an let the blood
freeze. Layer after layer they make a blood popsicle. When they are done,
the knife's blade is hidden inside just like a popsicle stick. Now they
take the knife out into the wilderness where they think a wolf might be.
There the bury the handle of the knife in the snow leaving the blood
popsicle standing up and they leave.

Now after a while a wolf will come along guided by his sense of smell and
find the "bloodsicle". He will being licking it, enjoying every taste.
Over and over he licks the knife and soon his tongue is so cold he cannot
feel it any longer. It's numb. But his taste for blood is growing and he
is not getting as much as he wants - you see, popsicles are slow eating.
Finally his licking exposes the razor sharp edge of the knife. It cuts
into his tongue again and again but he does not even notice for his tongue
can no longer feel anything. The wolfs own blood now flows from his cut
tongue. The wolf is thrilled, blood is now more plentiful and he continues
to lick more and more.

Soon he notices something is wrong, he is getting weaker not stronger.
Since he knows blood as food he increases his efforts to feed on the ever
increasing flow of blood. His last thoughts are of how good the now warm
blood tastes. Within minutes he licks his last and collapse next to the
now fully exposed knife. Here the Eskimo knows he will find the wolfs
body the next morning.

*****

We've heard this story several times in the last few years. We were
wondering if it is true or just an urban legend tossed about the
conservative Christian community.

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skeptic
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I can't imagine any wild animal being satisfied with licking up blood. Surely it would try and bite the frozen blood which would have the appearnce of meat.

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Dutch Angua
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Something just tells me that wolves are smarter than that.

Or it's just wishful thinking.

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Artemis
The First USA Noel


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The first thing that pops into my mind is what kind of pastor uses a story like this in a sermon? Does the wolf represent the unrepentant sinner? [Eek!]

Second...why are eskimos hunting wolves? Don't carnivores typically taste bad?

--------------------
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-Mustapha Mond, "Brave New World"

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Barns & No Bull
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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I read of the same way to kill a wolf when I was a kid. It was in a book I bought about the extirpation of wolves from the American plains in the 19th through early 20th Century. The same method was described for killing wolves in the winters of Montana. The book did credit the method to Arctic peoples. But it added another way to kill wolves in freezing temperatures.

It was said that wolf exterminators had devised another ingenious way of killing wolves that were instinctually set upon devouring anything resembling food which might be encountered as they did what they did (which mostly was described by common folk as killing and eating almost anything they ran across).

What you did was get yourself a caribou rib bone. Then you hone and sharpen the ends to be like knife points. Then you boil it in oil to make it soft. Then you roll up the softened rib like a... like a... I don't know what it's like... it's like you roll up something you roll up. Like a coil. Then that roll is placed inside a ball of lard. Then you take that ball (lard with rolled-up and sharpened Rudolf rib inside) outside where it is cold. It supposidly made a neat little tasty round Wolf Ball that would sit there waiting for a wolf to come along. You would then just start going around tossing these balls all about the wolf terrorist zone.

The idea was that a wolf would find the deadly lard ball and wolf it down whole without chewing it (FYI: we call wolves wolves because they wolve... or in singular... we call it a wolf because it does wolf when it eats).

So what happens after a wolf wolves a wolf ball? The stomach acids melt the lard and the dagger-like caribou rib uncoils inside the gut. It was supposed to whack wolves soon after eating the lard balls. Wolves were said to subsequently die with the rib bone protruding out both sides of their belly.

I think both stories are mythical folk tales about aboriginal ingenuitiy that never really was so spectacular in real life. I doubt that either method would have ever worked. The first fails because it wouldn't ever kill a wolf; and the second fails because you couldn't get the trap to work even if the wolf ate the fatty death ball.

I do wonder why the Pastor used the first account as a sermon illustration. If he was trying to show how smart he was, then that guy.... oh nevermind.

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Cervus
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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:
His last thoughts are of how good the now warm
blood tastes. Within minutes he licks his last and collapse next to the
now fully exposed knife. Here the Eskimo knows he will find the wolfs
body the next morning.

I doubt the veracity of anything that claims to know an animal's thoughts.

I also doubt the veracity of anything that claims a wolf can die of blood loss through its tongue in a manner of hours. From what is described in the story, the wolf's tongue should be severed if it were cut that badly by the knife.

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Won't somebody please think of the adults!

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Tasmanian Devil
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A few questions: why would you go to all that trouble to kill the wolf (assuming for food) when you have plenty of seal blood, and hence a nice fat seal, to make a blood popsicle?

Also, as stated above, why wouldn't the wolf try to chomp the knife rather than licking it?

I doubt the wolf's tongue would get so numb as to not feel anything... they have good circulation of blood in their tongues and mouths, which would mean their tongues are constantly receiving fresh blood supplies and would not freeze up and numb...

I'd say it's a badly constructed UL aimed at the unintelligent...

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Dropbear
Angels from the Realms so Glurgy


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quote:
originally posted by Barns & No Bull
I do wonder why the Pastor used the first account as a sermon illustration.

Reluctant as I am to encourage glurgers I would suggest that the pastor was suggesting that Satan uses a similar system to catch unwary souls. Like the seal's blood at first sin may "taste" good and appear to be a free meal but eventually the imagined nourishment ends up being just a trick and we end up harming (consuming) oursleves. Only by turning away from the "free meal" (and I imagine the pastor here made some sort of reference to fact that the only free lunch is the one from God - and that was paid for in Jesus' blood) can we hope to escape the clutches of the evil one.

Dropbear

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Spamamander in a pear tree
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This story appeared in one of John Norman's (abhorrently bad) Gor novels, where the setting was similar to Inuit peoples of Earth. The creatues they were hunting (attempting to fight off, they were being followed by a pack) were described as having a feeding frenzy bloodlust much like sharks, so when the first animal became weak from blood loss from licking the blade over and over, the others would kill it, and that led to more killing, etc. Eventually the remaining animals became so bloated and sated by the feast they were able to continue their journey in peace.

So I'm guessing the OP story has been around in some form for a long time, as Norman is an anthropology instructor and based most of the novels around some primitive or ancient culture of Earth. I have a difficult time believing an animal as intelligent as a wolf would fall for it though- it seems more like pinning an act of cruelty on a "less enlightened" culture than any kind of true story.

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"There is a race between mankind and the universe. Mankind is trying to build bigger, better, faster, and more foolproof machines. The universe is trying to build bigger, better, and faster fools. So far the universe is winning." -Albert Einstein

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Izzy Quigley
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You don't kill a wolf for food. You kill it for its fur, if you are an Eskimo and living in a cold climate.

No idea on whether or not the OP is true. It sounds kind of like a folktale - someone challenges a Pecos Bill type to kill a wolf, and he comes up with a crafty means of doing so.

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Yleemjseg
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Okay, so to kill Satanists we coat a cross in Jesus' blood and freeze it..
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Silkenreindeer
Wassaleing


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Wolves have an excellent sense of smell. Once they started bleeding, they'd have to recognize the scent of their own blood, even if their tongue was somehow so numb they couldn't feel it.

That and I just can't see a cut to the tongue causing sufficient bleeding to kill something.

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Artemis
The First USA Noel


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Also, would a wolf's tongue stick to the frozen bloodsicle? (Mmm, bloodsicle.)

ETA: Wait, no, that's just metal. *Sheepish look...*

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lynnejanet
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quote:
Originally posted by Artemis:
Also, would a wolf's tongue stick to the frozen bloodsicle? (Mmm, bloodsicle.)

ETA: Wait, no, that's just metal. *Sheepish look...*

Nope, it' not just metal. My son's lips and tongue stuck to an extra-cold popsicle a couple of years ago. He reflexively jerked the popsicle away, and tore off good-sized chunks of the skin on his lips and tongue. It was pretty gory, although ultimately harmless.

As for the OP though, it sounds like a romanticized folk tale. And utter crap.

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lynne"insert appropriate punny phrase here"janet

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Barns & No Bull
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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quote:
Then they dip it in the blood of a seal they have killed. (you see seals are fairly easy to trap but wolves are very dangerous). After dipping the knife in blood they set it outside in the cold so the blood freezes on the knife. After if freezes (a matter of minutes) they dip it again into the seal blood and again take it out an let the blood freeze. Layer after layer they make a blood popsicle.
Wouldn't it be easier to just put the seal blood into a cup or something and then put in the knife and let the whole thing freeze at once... like a real popsicle?

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Barns & No Bull
It Came Upon a Midnight Clearance


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quote:
Originally posted by Silkenrain:

Wolves have an excellent sense of smell.

...and the Eskimos have had eons to learn of their weaknesses and exploit them. I read that some Eskimos will approach a wolf and fling open their sealskin parka and knock them out with their BO.

Another story claims that Eskimos kill wolves by using ducks. They tie a piece of bacon to a very long fishing line. Then the bacon is fed to a duck (which cannot digest it), which it passes through intact. A wolf will wolf the bacon and when the duck flies away it yanks the wolf right off the ground. Eventually, the line breaks or the bacon is regurgitated and the wolf fatally crashes back to earth. They didn't explain how the line is attached to the duck.

Yet another mentions Eskimos dropping old Penthouse magazines (they have lots of these laying around) onto the icy fields. Wolves will come along and be so enthralled that they just stand there forever and freeze to death. It keeps killing wolves until the magazine gets covered with snow or dead wolves or whatnot.

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Terrified, mortified, petrified, stupefied... by you!

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Dutch Angua
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Barns & No Bull, YOMANK! And a new pair of nostrils too!

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guruwan2b
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Another way the eskimos kill wolves is they take a can of peas, cut a hole in the ice, pour the peas around the hole. When the wolf comes up to take a pea, they kick it in the ice hole..... Oh, wait, that was polar bears.....

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Drainfluid
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Another way they do it is to take a shotgun, load it with ammo, then go and lie in wait for a wolf to pass.

When they see a wolf, they blow across the top of the shotgun barrels making a "whoo" noise the wolves find hypnotising. The eskimo then approaches the en-tranced wolf and hits it over the head with the shotgun, thus stunning it (this was why you needed the gun to be loaded, more weight).

Then he digs a deep hole using the butt of the gun, pushes the wolf into it, which then dies from the fall.

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glisp42
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quote:
Originally posted by Silkenrain:


That and I just can't see a cut to the tongue causing sufficient bleeding to kill something.

Yes it can. My friend who used to do Wolf Rescue said a wolf can die from a cut on it's tongue in as little as 15 minutes.

Now of course, you don't need to do anything that complicated. All you have to do is shoot them from helicopters. [Frown]

I was sickened by the OP and even more sickened when I went to verify it(which I never could, I gave up trying).

I think I'll divorce humanity for a while.

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Artemis
The First USA Noel


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I googled it, and all I could find was glurge. But for those of you who were wondering why a pastor would tell such a gruesome story...I submit the following links:

Satan is the eskimo and we are the wolf...
Temptation is the bloody knife and we are the wolf...

The bloodiscle represents smoking, drinking, and promiscuity...

--------------------
"You can't play Electro-magnetic Golf according to the rules of Centrifugal Bumble Puppy."
-Mustapha Mond, "Brave New World"

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Ink Rose
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Wouldn't it jsut be easier to poison some meat, set a trap, shoot the thing, or put a fish hook type dealie inside a piece of meat?

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Kindly Wise
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ARRRGH! Don't get me started on "Sermon Illustrations"! I can never figure out why preachers have to use stoooopid and easily debunked stories to illustrate a theological point. The world abounds with verifiable irony.

Speaking of which, the flaw in the "Eskimo Wolf Killer" story is that the wolf would indeed simply wolf down the deadly blood-cicle. As an illustration (!) thereof I submit the following image:
 -

Full story at BBC
This, of course, is NOT a wolf, but a Staffordshire Terrier pup; even MORE amazing!

Of course, having ingested the weapon, the wolf would then carry it away from the convenient retrieval site, to die in the wilderness, thus losing the hunter both pelt and valuable knife.

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Beati caseusarii

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Kindly Wise
I'll Be Home for After Christmas Sales


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Here's another knife-eating dog :

 -

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Beati caseusarii

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Ink Rose
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as the vet hospital I saw Xrays of gods and cats that ahd eatten:

An entire ball of string with needles attached, the string had caughton the tongue which caused the symptoms.

A dog that had eatten the living room, bits of couch, VCR, wires, tape, etc were inside him. It was a miracle he wasn't electrocuted.

A dog that had eatten a 12 inch long stocking.

--------------------
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ChelleGame
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I would have walked out of that church and never returned. Blech.

I kinda judge churches and religions based on their compassion toward animals, and that the pastor told this tale as a kind of throw-away parable, rather than something quite sad, would have made them fail my test.

It's my own personal issue.

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Michelle

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jessboo
The First USA Noel


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quote:
Originally posted by snopes:

(you see seals are fairly easy to trap but wolves are very dangerous).

Firstly, thanks for explaining the difference between seals and wolves. [fish]

Second, if the Eskimo is Satan and the we are the wolf...who is the seal?

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Do you have any wine? All of this would go a lot smoother in an altered state of reality.

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