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Author Topic: Christmas at the Gas Station
I'm 20th Century Fox
Happy Holly Days


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From PalletMastersWorkship.com

Shootings, attempted robbery, a woman in labor, a stranger - can they stick any more glurge in this one? I think not.

Christmas At The Gas Station

The old man sat in his gas station on a cold Christmas Eve. He hadn't been anywhere in years since his wife had passed away. It was just another day to him. He didn't hate Christmas, just couldn't find a reason to celebrate. He was sitting there looking at the snow that had been falling for the last hour and wondering what it was all about when the door opened and a homeless man stepped through.

Instead of throwing the man out, Old George as he was known by his customers, told the man to come and sit by the heater and warm up. "Thank you, but I don't mean to intrude," said the stranger. "I see you're busy, I'll just go." "Not without something hot in your belly." George said.

He turned and opened a wide mouth Thermos and handed it to the stranger. "It ain't much, but it's hot and tasty, "Stew ... made it myself. When you're done, there's coffee and it's fresh."

Just at that moment he heard the "ding" of the driveway bell. "Excuse me, be right back," George said. There in the driveway was an old '53 Chevy. Steam was rolling out of the front. The driver was panicked. "Mister can you help me!" said the driver, with a deep Spanish accent. "My wife is with child and my car is broken."

George opened the hood. It was bad. The block looked cracked from the cold, the car was dead. "You ain't going in this thing," George said as he turned away.

"But Mister, please help ..." The door of the office closed behind George as he went inside. He went to the office wall and got the keys to his old truck, and went back outside. He walked around the building, opened the garage, started the truck and drove it around to where the couple was waiting. "Here, take my truck," he said. "She ain't the best thing you ever looked at, but she runs real good."

George helped put the woman in the truck and watched as it sped off into the night. He turned and walked back inside the office. "Glad I gave 'em the truck, their tires were shot too. That 'ol truck has brand new ........" George thought he was talking to the stranger, but the man had gone. The Thermos was on the desk, empty, with a used coffee cup beside it. "Well, at least he got something in his belly," George thought.

George went back outside to see if the old Chevy would start. It cranked slowly, but it started. He pulled it into the garage where the truck had been. He thought he would tinker with it for something to do. Christmas Eve meant no customers. He discovered the the block hadn't cracked, it was just the bottom hose on the radiator. "Well, shoot, I can fix this," he said to himself. So he put a new one on.

"Those tires ain't gonna get 'em through the winter either." He took the snow treads off of his wife's old Lincoln. They were like new and he wasn't going to drive the car anyway.

As he was working, he heard shots being fired. He ran outside and beside a police car an officer lay on the cold ground. Bleeding from the left shoulder, the officer moaned, "Please help me."

George helped the officer inside as he remembered the training he had received in the Army as a medic. He knew the wound needed attention. "Pressure to stop the bleeding," he thought. The uniform company had been there that morning and had left clean shop towels. He used those and duct tape to bind the wound. "Hey, they say duct tape can fix anythin'," he said, trying to make the policeman feel at ease.

"Something for pain," George thought. All he had was the pills he used for his back. "These ought to work." He put some water in a cup and gave the policeman the pills. "You hang in there, I'm going to get you an ambulance."

The phone was dead. "Maybe I can get one of your buddies on that there talk box out in your car." He went out only to find that a bullet had gone into the dashboard destroying the two way radio.

He went back in to find the policeman sitting up. "Thanks," said the officer. "You could have left me there. The guy that shot me is still in the area."

George sat down beside him, "I would never leave an injured man in the Army and I ain't gonna leave you." George pulled back the bandage to check for bleeding. "Looks worse than what it is. Bullet passed right through 'ya. Good thing it missed the important stuff though. I think with time your gonna be right as rain."

George got up and poured a cup of coffee. "How do you take it?" he asked. "None for me," said the officer. "Oh, yer gonna drink this. Best in the city. Too bad I ain't got no donuts." The officer laughed and winced at the same time.

The front door of the office flew open. In burst a young man with a gun. "Give me all your cash! Do it now!" the young man yelled. His hand was shaking and George could tell that he had never done anything like this before.

"That's the guy that shot me!" exclaimed the officer.

"Son, why are you doing this?" asked George, "You need to put the cannon away. Somebody else might get hurt."

The young man was confused. "Shut up old man, or I'll shoot you, too. Now give me the cash!"

The cop was reaching for his gun. "Put that thing away," George said to the cop, "we got one too many in here now."

He turned his attention to the young man. "Son, it's Christmas Eve. If you need money, well then, here. It ain't much but it's all I got. Now put that pee shooter away."

George pulled $150 out of his pocket and handed it to the young man, reaching for the barrel of the gun at the same time. The young man released his grip on the gun, fell to his knees and began to cry. "I'm not very good at this am I? All I wanted was to buy something for my wife and son," he went on. "I've lost my job, my rent is due, my car got repossessed last week ..."

George handed the gun to the cop. Son, we all get in a bit of squeeze now and then. The road gets hard sometimes, but we make it through the best we can."

He got the young man to his feet, and sat him down on a chair across from the cop. "Sometimes we do stupid things." George handed the young man a cup of coffee. "Bein' stupid is one of the things that makes us human. Comin' in here with a gun ain't the answer. Now sit there and get warm and we'll sort this thing out."

The young man had stopped crying. He looked over to the cop. "Sorry I shot you. It just went off. I'm sorry officer."

"Shut up and drink your coffee." the cop said.

George could hear the sounds of sirens outside. A police car and an ambulance skidded to a halt. Two cops came through the door, guns drawn. "Chuck! You ok?" one of the cops asked the wounded officer.

"Not bad for a guy who took a bullet. How did you find me?"

"GPS locator in the car. Best thing since sliced bread. Who did this?" the other cop asked as he approached the young man.

Chuck answered him, "I don't know. The guy ran off into the dark. Just dropped his gun and ran."

George and the young man both looked puzzled at each other.

"That guy work here?," the wounded cop continued. "Yep," George said, "just hired him this morning. Boy lost his job."

The paramedics came in and loaded Chuck onto the stretcher. The young man leaned over the wounded cop and whispered, "Why?"

Chuck just said, "Merry Christmas boy ... and you too, George, and thanks for everything."

"Well, looks like you got one doozy of a break there. That ought to solve some of your problems."

George went into the back room and came out with a box. He pulled out a ring box. "Here you go, something for the little woman. I don't think Martha would mind. She said it would come in handy some day."

The young man looked inside to see the biggest diamond ring he ever saw. "I can't take this," said the young man. "It means something to you."

"And now it means something to you," replied George. "I got my memories. That's all I need."

George reached into the box again. An airplane, a car and a truck appeared next. They were toys that the oil company had left for him to sell. "Here's something for that little man of yours."

The young man began to cry again as he handed back the $150 that the old man had handed him earlier.

"And what are you supposed to buy Christmas dinner with? You keep that too," George said, "Now git home to your family."

The young man turned with tears streaming down his face. "I'll be here in the morning for work, if that job offer is still good."

"Nope. I'm closed Christmas day," George said. "See ya the day after."

George turned around to find that the stranger had returned. "Where'd you come from? I thought you left?"

"I have been here. I have always been here," said the stranger. "You say you don't celebrate Christmas. Why?"

"Well, after my wife passed away, I just couldn't see what all the bother was. Puttin' up a tree and all seemed a waste of a good pine tree. Bakin' cookies like I used to with Martha just wasn't the same by myself and besides I was gettin' a little chubby."

The stranger put his hand on George's shoulder. "But you do celebrate the holiday, George.
You gave me food and drink and warmed me when I was cold and hungry.
The woman with child will bear a son and he will become a great doctor.
The policeman you helped will go on to save 19 people from being killed by terrorists.
The young man who tried to rob you will make you a rich man and not take any for himself. "That is the spirit of the season and you keep it as good as any man."

George was taken aback by all this stranger had said. "And how do you know all this?" asked the old man.

"Trust me, George. I have the inside track on this sort of thing. And when your days are done you will be with Martha again."

The stranger moved toward the door. "If you will excuse me, George, I have to go now. I have to go home where there is a big celebration planned."

George watched as the old leather jacket and the torn pants that the stranger was wearing turned into a white robe. A golden light began to fill the room.

"You see, George ... it's My birthday. Merry Christmas."

George fell to his knees and replied,
"Happy Birthday, Lord."

Author Unknown

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When my chin is on the ground I pick myself up, dust myself off and start all over again.

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gizard
I Saw Three Shipments


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I wasn't aware that it was a good idea to give a gunshot victim sedatives. I swore this story was cut and paste until they listed everything at the end. Was like a written screen play of MacGuyver
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Tangueray and Whine
Deck the Malls


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I sure as hell don't ever want to work at that gas station! All sorts of weird things happen, and old George always has the answer. I expected a space ship to land and an extraterrestrial come running out, begging for help to fix the hyperdrive, and George saying, "Well, I just happen to have a spare one o' them in the back room somewheres. You just have yourself a seat and help yourself to the coffee and I'll go and fetch it. Oh, and here's $100 so's you can buy some Christmas gifts for the wife and kids."

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If ignorance is bliss, then why aren't more people happy?

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BlushingBride
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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Isn't giving away all of your valuables a common sign of senility? Maybe George's kids should come back and get Dad a nice neurological workup. I'm sure the doctor will be reassured by George's explanation that he only did it because the son of God drank his stew...

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"In perfume, as in underwear, the scantiest of applications provides the greatest of returns." -Silas Sparkhammer

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timbobmc
Jingle Bell Hock


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But where were the puppies? And the threat about not forwarding it to a bazillion people? Huh? Huh?

What a crappy piece of glurge to leave those out! [Confused] [Roll Eyes]

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Ich bin der Welt abhanden gekommen.

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Dr. Dave
Frosty the Pitchman


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Did anyone else notice this?


We have an old '53 Chevy, apparently no cell phones, "oil companies" that supply toys to station owners...so that puts us somewhere in the '70's, right?

Yet, they policeman was rescued by his partners:
quote:
"Not bad for a guy who took a bullet. How did you find me?"

"GPS locator in the car. Best thing since sliced bread.

So, when were GPS locators invented and installed routinely in police cars anyway?
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Open Mike Night
Little Sales Drummer Boy


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quote:
Originally posted by Dr. Dave:
Did anyone else notice this?


We have an old '53 Chevy, apparently no cell phones, "oil companies" that supply toys to station owners...so that puts us somewhere in the '70's, right?

Yet, they policeman was rescued by his partners:
quote:
"Not bad for a guy who took a bullet. How did you find me?"

"GPS locator in the car. Best thing since sliced bread.

So, when were GPS locators invented and installed routinely in police cars anyway?
In this Glurge, GPS is Gertrude Pearl Smith, the switch board operator, she knew everything that was happening in town.

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On the crusade to eliminate Moral Asshattery wherever it exists
Member: AAMAH

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Deansinger
Deck the Malls


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Y'know, if you got a 53 Chevy that runs, you can get a decent chunk of money for it. As I write this, there's one on Ebay with BuyItNow price near 10 grand

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It doesn't matter if you're wrong.. Be Wrong Loud!

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GenYus
Away in a Manager's Special


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quote:
Originally posted by Dr. Dave:
We have an old '53 Chevy, apparently no cell phones, "oil companies" that supply toys to station owners...so that puts us somewhere in the '70's, right?

Not necessarily. Chevron (gas company vs. oil company could be local dialect) sells toy cars through their gas stations. The started using cartoon-like talking cars in their TV commercials. They became so popular that Chevron decided to sell toy versions of them.

While there were no cell phones in evidence that may not mean much. Old George don't cotton to that new-fangled gadgetry, the couple with the '53 Chevy may not be able to afford one, the cop doesn't carry one on duty, and the robber lost his.

One thing that is somewhat dated to me is the radio in the car. It seems that most police now carry a radio on their belt. While smaller or poorer PDs might still only have a radio in the car, would a smaller or poorer PD have a GPS in the car?

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IIRC, it wasn't the shoe bomber's loud prayers that sparked the takedown by the other passengers; it was that he was trying to light his shoe on fire. Very, very different. Canuckistan

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BlushingBride
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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quote:
Originally posted by GenYus:
One thing that is somewhat dated to me is the radio in the car. It seems that most police now carry a radio on their belt. While smaller or poorer PDs might still only have a radio in the car, would a smaller or poorer PD have a GPS in the car?

There you go, spoiling perfectly good glurge with unnecessary logic. [Big Grin]

Texaco also sells toy trucks, usually pretty cool ones. My brother has gotten one every year for Christmas for as long as I can remember, except for that brief period when Texaco ceased to exist, and then he got some Chevron cars.

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"In perfume, as in underwear, the scantiest of applications provides the greatest of returns." -Silas Sparkhammer

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Aptenodytes_Forsteriis
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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You all misunderstood this one. Let me retell it to clear out the ambiguity.

One day Don Giorgio, capo of the local syndicate was sitting in his office behind the chopshop. An Hispanic bagman named Jesus walked in.

"Hola, Don Giorgio, I am here to discuss a proposition concerning the new autoparts business you have started up. My boss Pablo Escobar has connections in Guadalajara that will pay upto 30% of list for used autoparts."

"Jesus, I am busy now. Please sit, have an espresso, I will be happy to discuss this proposition, when I am finished with these important matters."

"No problem."

Just then a stretch LTC with full lowrider suspension skidded into the parking lot. Raoulle stepped out and called for the Don.

"Don Giorgio, the heater in my ride is out and all the Hos are complainin. I got Johns all over the city waiting for their dates and all the Hos is gonna be out sick if we don't fix it now."

"As a gesture of respect you and the Hos may take my personal bulletproof Mercedes for the night. I will try to fix the heat in your car."

"Thank you Don Giorgio, you are a life saver. My Ho's can spread holiday cheer throughout the town. Thank you so much!"

Raoulle, accompanied by half a dozen skimpily dressed young ladies climbed into the Don's car.

Don Giorgio pulled the limo into the garage. He popped the hood and examined the heater air intake.

"Aha, just as I suspected. It is clogged with dirty lingerie again. I have told Those Hos to stop leaving their unmentionables all over the place."

Just then a series of shots rang out. Giorgio raced into the street and found Officer Grabby McBribe bleeding in the gutter.

"Officer, it appears that you have hurt yourself, let me help you into my office so that we can make you more comfortable."

"No!!!!! I am fine, please don't hurt me anymore."

Giorgio dragged the wounded officer into the garage. strangely he dragged him by the bullet hole.

Giorgio looked at the officer as he lifted a can of wd40, alighter and a ballpeen hammer.

"I can fix anything with some Wd40 and a ballpeen" said Giorgio with a grin.

'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGHH, OK OK $200 a week is fine, I'm sorry I asked for more bribe money. In fact $100 is fine. I'll look the other way for $100 a week."

Just then Rocky stepped into the office and said "Hey boss, I taught that Grabby cop a lesson like you said, Oh I see you already found him."

Giogio called an ambulance for Officer Grabby, who, in keeping with the christmas spirit (the spirit of living until christmas refused to press charges.

Giorgio turned back to Jesus and said " Now my friend, let us talk business."

"OK, we can probably go up to 50% of list. That Rocky is scarier than 19 terrorists and if you can hook me up with that Ho in the Santa costume it'll be just what the doctor ordered. By the way that is some good espresso."

Giorgio basked in the warm glow of another holiday triumph. Then he went back to selling heroin to school children. He packaged the heroin in special glurge puppy shaped wrappers.

Send this email to anyone and Rocky will come give YOU the christmas spirit.

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'Hello, assorted humanoid strangers. You are standing casually in our forest. This bewilders us.' Blatherskite

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boogers
We Three Blings


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But what's with the comment about the "pee shooter?" Was the kid planning to rob the joint or did he just need the restroom?
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Deansinger
Deck the Malls


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quote:
Originally posted by boogers:
But what's with the comment about the "pee shooter?" Was the kid planning to rob the joint or did he just need the restroom?

Good question. A water pistol filled with bodily waste fluid? Truly a deadly weapon for our modern times!

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It doesn't matter if you're wrong.. Be Wrong Loud!

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Lainie
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
I wasn't aware that it was a good idea to give a gunshot victim sedatives.
Or food and drink, either. Of course, I was also surprised that the wounded cop was able to chat with George and attempt to pull his own weapon when the gunman showed up. Chuck's a tough one.

I'm also surprised that the uniform company delivers clean towels on Christmas eve. In my experience, they tell you what their holiday schedule is and expect you to order accordingly. We're talking shop towels, not perishable goods or life-saving medications.

What dated the story for me was the driveway bell. Maybe this is a regional thing, but all the gas stations in Ohio have been self-serve for years and there is no driveway bell.

ETA: And what's with this bit:
quote:
The young man who tried to rob you will make you a rich man and not take any for himself. "That is the spirit of the season and you keep it as good as any man."
Helping somebody make you rich is the spirit of the season? [Confused]

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How homophobic do you have to be to have penguin gaydar? - Lewis Black

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BlushingBride
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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Lainie,
At the risk of defending glurge, I believe that line is intended to refer to all of the lines above it.
quote:
You gave me food and drink and warmed me when I was cold and hungry.
The woman with child will bear a son and he will become a great doctor.
The policeman you helped will go on to save 19 people from being killed by terrorists.
The young man who tried to rob you will make you a rich man and not take any for himself. "That is the spirit of the season and you keep it as good as any man."

I.E. feeding the sick, helping the injured, welcoming children into the world, and forgiving criminals are all part of the spirit of Christmas. Generosity, love, and forgiveness as part of the Christmas spirit.

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"In perfume, as in underwear, the scantiest of applications provides the greatest of returns." -Silas Sparkhammer

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Lainie
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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Holly, I get the part about forgiveness, but it doesn't say, "The man who tried to rob you will go on to be a good and loyal employee," or "will live a useful, productive life," etc. It says "he will make you a rich man." Coming after the other statements, it seems oddly materialistic. I don't think it fits with the other statements.

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How homophobic do you have to be to have penguin gaydar? - Lewis Black

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Methuselah
Happy Holly Days


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quote:
Originally posted by Lainie:
Holly, I get the part about forgiveness, but it doesn't say, "The man who tried to rob you will go on to be a good and loyal employee," or "will live a useful, productive life," etc. It says "he will make you a rich man." Coming after the other statements, it seems oddly materialistic. I don't think it fits with the other statements.

Shhhh...you can't let on that the point of christianity isn't REALLY about being physically rewarded ten-fold for acts of kindness and charity. The church would lose about 98% of its followers if word of that got out. [Wink]

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"The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him." - G.K. Chesterton

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I'm 20th Century Fox
Happy Holly Days


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Aptenodytes_Forsteriis, you SO OMANK for this:
Don Giorgio, the heater in my ride is out and all the Hos are complainin. I got Johns all over the city waiting for their dates and all the Hos is gonna be out sick if we don't fix it now.

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When my chin is on the ground I pick myself up, dust myself off and start all over again.

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Aptenodytes_Forsteriis
We Wish You a Merry Giftmas


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quote:
Originally posted by Anya's First Christmas:
Aptenodytes_Forsteriis, you SO OMANK for this:
Don Giorgio, the heater in my ride is out and all the Hos are complainin. I got Johns all over the city waiting for their dates and all the Hos is gonna be out sick if we don't fix it now.

WHOO HOO (fist pumping in air) my first yomank

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'Hello, assorted humanoid strangers. You are standing casually in our forest. This bewilders us.' Blatherskite

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Tangueray and Whine
Deck the Malls


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Well, luckily, I have a spare keyboard should the need arise, and believe me, it almost did!  -

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If ignorance is bliss, then why aren't more people happy?

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TrishDaDish
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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You see, George? You really had a wonderful life!

quote:
A police car and an ambulance skidded to a halt.
Let's assume (and as a cop's kid, I should know better than you use that word!) that the cop had called in the station, saying he had the perp in his sights and called for backup. Then he was shot (along with the call box). The station used the tracking device to figure out where his location is, when they realise the call box isn't working. So why is the ambulance there? Do they just expect the worst? (Considering this gas station, maybe that is the case! Cripes!)

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I would prefer not to.
My blog

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MsBeaverhausen
Deck the Malls


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quote:
Originally posted by HollyJollyBride:
Texaco also sells toy trucks, usually pretty cool ones. My brother has gotten one every year for Christmas for as long as I can remember, except for that brief period when Texaco ceased to exist, and then he got some Chevron cars. [/QB]

You can't forget about Hess Trucks either. You know "The Hess truck's back and it's better than ever, for X-mas this year the Hess truck's here"

I have to buy my DH two every year for Hanukkah, one for playing and one to be MIB.

ETA: because I forgot the stupid jingle

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I love Jesus... PURPLE JESUS !!!

Posts: 248 | From: Ft. Lauderdale, FL | Registered: Sep 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Canuckistan
Ding Dong! Merrily on High Definition TV


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quote:
George fell to his knees and replied,
"Happy Birthday, Lord."

One of my best birthdays ever had an just like this: someone falling to their knees and responding, "Happy birthday, Canuckistan."

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People need to stop appropriating Jesus as their reason for behaving badly. It's so irritating. (Avril)

Posts: 8429 | From: New York run by the Swiss (Toronto) | Registered: Mar 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
Senior
Let There Be PCs on Earth


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I can picture the guy going to his regular diner for supper that night.

Waitress: Hi, George. How was work today?
George: Same old same old.

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Ad astra per asparagus.

Posts: 4806 | From: Groton, CT | Registered: Jul 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
fledibat
Deck the Malls


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I work at a gas station, and the most exciting thing that ever happened was one of my co-workers passing out on the floor during an asthma attack (She's fine now).

The only "heartwarming" things that happen are when customers spill coffee on my chest.

Posts: 239 | From: Minnesota | Registered: Jul 2003  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a moderator
   

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